I 



^ 




Class _jLl_ ^fw '" 

Si' 



Book 



Gop^Tigiit]^' 



COFi^lGHT DEPOSIT. 






^-^ii^ e-*^~ 'Z^^L^ -^y^ '^—i^'Cji 



The Life 



of 



by 

John Schuette 



/ dedicate this book 

to my friends, 

and to all striving to live 

within their income, 

by which the most gratifying competency 

can best be acquired. 

-J. S. 



THE STORY OF 



who 

Began Married Life 

on an 

Income of $900-00 a Year 

shows the 

Comforting Results 

attained by 

Strict Economy 

Systematic 

House and Bookkeeping 

and their 

Accumulations 

to their 

Olden Age 



(J 



.S4- 



Copyright, 1914 

BY 

JOHN SCHUETTE 



APR 13 1914 



,A371327 



TABLE OF CONTENTS 



PAGE 

Introduction . xv 

Chapter I 
Engagement and marriage. They discuss how to 
finance the family expenses 1 

Chapter II 
Rose a suffragist. Explains it to John. Challenges 
him to debate . 11 

Chapter III 
John presents ten objections to woman suffrage. 
Rose quarrels with suffragists and resigns . . .19 

Chapter IV 
Five years' family bookkeeping. Single and double 
entry 29 

Chapter V 
Trustee company invests John's $1,000 and Rose's 
$500 at four per cent compound interest. Table 
showing accumulation 40 

Chapter VI 
John as supercargo and cook on the schooner Traveler 42 

Chapter VII 
They plan how to acquire their own home ... 47 

Chapter VIII 
They buy a home and move into it. How they 
financed|it 52 



X Table of Contents 

Chapter IX 
John explains stock companies, and how they are 
watered .57 

Chapter X 

How water is squeezed out of stock 64 

Chapter XI 
Rose asks why she was not insured. John explains, 
and tells about insurance generally. Also about 
taxation and income tax 68 

Chapter XII 
Change to a more affectionate subject. First Silver 
Lake picnic 75 

Chapter XIII 
Second picnic. John relates how he built a boat 
named Violet in his boyhood 81 

Chapter XIV 
Adam's twelfth birthday. Gets a yearly allowance 
of $35. Deposits it in a savings bank .... 86 

Chapter XV 
The Rapids picnic. John tells of the storming of the 
county jail 91 

Chapter XVI 

Adam goes to college 100 

Chapter XVII 
The high cost of living induces them to sell their 
house and buy and move on a farm . , . .103 

Chapter XVIII 
First year on the farm. They take an inventory at 
the beginning 110 

Chapter XIX 
John receives $1,000 on his first life insurance policy. 
Donates it to charity 113 



Table of Contents xi 

Chapter XX 
End of first year's operations on the farm. Inventory 
and trial balance at its close 123 

Chapter XXI 
The first farm party. General discussion on topics 
of the day 129 

Chapter XXII 
Second year on the farm. Inventory and trial bal- 
ance. Cannot agree on a second party . . . 143 

Chapter XXIII 
Second party postponed. Wrangle about dessert 
and social etiquette 153 

Chapter XXIV 
Compromise on the second party. A discussion of the 
tariff 159 

Chapter XXV 
Trips to Bermuda Islands, Hot Springs, and Natural 
Bridge 178 

Chapter XXVI 
Their silver wedding. A discussion of socialism, 
municipal ownership, and Bellamyism . . . .201 

Chapter XXVII 
Eva gets married and departs from her childhood 
home 214 

Chapter XXVIII 

John takes a lake cruise 217 

Chapter XXIX 
John, as the only surviving charter member of the 
singing society, delivers his farewell address on its 
fiftieth anniversary 240 



LIST OF ILLUSTRATIONS 

FACES 
PAGE 

Their Home Town xv 

Their Photo 1 

Schooner Traveler 42 

Their House 52 

Silver Lake Convent 75 

Silver Creek Picnic Grounds 81 

Adam's Birthday Party 86 

Rapids Village 91 

Road to Farm 110 

Farm Party 129 

The Cream of the Farm 159 

Hamilton, Bermuda Island 178 

Hot Springs, Va 187 

Natural Bridge, Va . . . 196 

Lexington, Va 201 

Launch El Tempo on River 217 

Point Lighthouse 219 

El Tempo on Beach, North Bay 224 

Entrance Sturgeon Bay Canal 228 

Singers' Picnic 240 

xiii 



INTRODUCTION 

IT is said that experience is the best teacher, but ex- 
pensive. If this is true, having had many lessons 
and many years' training from that source, I ought to 
have acquired a large store of knowledge. Although it 
may have been expensive to me, it may not have been so 
to the reader, who I hope will derive some benefit from it. 
The main purpose in writing this book is to inculcate 
the habit of saving ; and as the dollar plays the most 
important part in it, I shall first elucidate on this in- 
dispensable medium. 

THE ALMIGHTY DOLLAR 

The almighty dollar has a great attraction for our 
people; not for itself, for it may be but a dirty rag of 
paper, but because with it we can buy things dearest 
to our hearts — not exactly everything, but most things. 
Even honor, health, and love find the dollars mighty 
convenient. But in spite of it all, wealth does not 
bring that happiness which many who possess but little 
believe it does. 

Of course wealth sufficient to place us beyond want 
and worry it is by aU means our duty to strive for, but 
at all events acquire it honestly. Then you can ap- 
preciate and enjoy it ; otherwise it will be only a burden 
and a curse to you. 



xvi Introduction 

Some say tKe more you have the more you want, even 
if you have more than you can ever use. This may be 
so with some; but with most who have a large fortune 
and yet yearn for more it is not so much to pile up 
more dollars as for the satisfaction and glory of beat- 
ing or excelling others in the game, from which they 
derive the pleasure of being considered able, clever, 
sm.art, or whatever glory they may find in it. 

It is the same when you play cards, or any other 
game, for fun, without any stakes ; you enjoy the game 
when you win. I remember that in playing chess with 
my wife, when I won, I enjoyed it; but when I lost by 
making a falipe move, I got so angry that I could jump 
out of my hide, though I could not lose or win a nickel, 
but only my reputation. 

Eeal wealth lies in happiness or contentment. If you 
are content with your condition and yourself, you 
are wealthy. A few years ago my only living friend 
and schoolmate in Germany visited me. He had just 
been pensioned after serving as treasurer of the duchy 
of Oldenburg for many years. 

When I asked him how he felt, he replied, "Never 
better in my life, content from A to Z." "Well, well, 
then you are a millionaire ? " " Oh no, " he replied, * ' I 
have not much of the world's goods — just enough to keep 
me comfortable to the end of my days." "Now, what 
more do you want than enough to keep you going to the 
end? When the end is reached, you want nothing more 
to keep you going. But if you remain content, you are 
a millionaire. ' ' And he admitted that in this sense I was 
correct. It is perhaps fortunate that money will not buy 
contentment. If it did, there would be a still greater 



Introduction xvii 

scramble for it, while' as it is, those who possess but little 
may enjoy life, and feel rich in contentment, while the 
wealthy may be poor in contentment and live a life of 
wretchedness. 

But we must therefore not idle our time away, but 
labor to produce (something which creates wealth; and 
although you yourself may have no use for it, others 
will, and eventually it will benefit the human race. 
Wealth acquired by your own effort, and increased from 
year to year, even if moderate in amount, is far more 
enjoyed and appreciated than ten times as much ac- 
quired by gift or inheritance. A German proverb 
says: "Arbeit macht das Leben suess," (Labor sweet- 
ens life.) Now let me show you how it sweetened mine, 
and how by it 

I EAENED MY FIRST SHILLING 

As the earning of the first money in one's life is an 
event seldom forgotten and most interesting to dwell 
upon, I shall now relate when, how, and where I earned 
my first shilling. About sixty years ago our silver coin 
consisted not as now of United States coin, but Mexican ; 
that is, Mexican dollars divided into eighths; one shill- 
ing being one-eighth of a dollar, or twelve and one-half 
cents; two, twenty-five cents; three, thirty-seven and 
one-half cents ; four, fifty cents, etc. 

In 1852, about sixty years ago, before' school hours I 
had to supply the family with water for the day, which 
I did from a well which was nearest and which also 
supplied the neighborhood. It was located a little' east 
of the "Williams house, at the foot of a small hill or ele- 
vation, and was dug about 1845. Many thousand pails 



xviii Introduction 

did I carry up this ten-foot embankment to our kitchen. 
It was an open well, from which with a pole with a hook 
to it, the pails were hauled out. 

This well often reminded me of Woodworth 's poem : — 

''How dear to my heart are the scenes of my childhood, 

When fond recollection presents them to view; 

The orchard, the meadow, the deep-tangled wildwood, 

And every loved spot which my infancy knew; 

The wide spreading pond, and the mill that stood by it. 

The bridge, and the rock where the cataract fell, 

The cot of my father, the dairy house nigh it. 

And e'en the rude bucket which hung in the well." 

1 first carried water in one pail, but soon discovered 
that I could carry two easier than one by simply getting 
inside of a barrel hoop, and carrying the pails outside. 
Just across the street was the first blacksmith and wagon 
shop, operated by John Peters. He was constructing his 
first wagon, and when I was getting water, I would 
often run across to watch its progress from start to fin- 
ish, which was very interesting to me, as it was the first 
I had ever seen built. 

That I at one tinie lingered too long, and kept my 
mother waiting for the water, is attested by the commo- 
tion I raised in our neighborhood. Some one was sent 
after me, and when only the pails and hoop were found 
at the well, the report spread that I must be in the well. 
Of course the dear mothers stood around it crying. 
One of the men, looking down the well, saw bubbles. An- 
other said, ' ' This must be Johnny : he always was full of 
wind. ' ' I took in the situation when I noticed the multi- 



Introduction xix 

tude-, ran across the street, and in a hurry threw myself 
into my mother's arms, with the promise that I would 
never do such a foolish thing again. 

I think Peters must have worked on the wagon about 
two months when it was ready for painting. One day 
when I was watching him mixing green paint, he said: 
"Well, Johnny, at last the wagon is done, except the 
painting; there are no painters in town; by the way, 
could you not paint the wagon? I want it painted 
with one heavy coat of green. ' ' 

"Why, of course I can; what will you give me, and 
about how long will it take to do it ? " 

He replied, ' ' You ought to complete it in a day or 
two, and I will pay you one shilling." "All right," 
said I, "that is a go. But we ought not to paint it 
all green: only the box should be green and the lower 
body red; this will show better taste." "Yes," he said, 
"you are right, and it will cost no more, either." So he 
mixed some red paint, and commenced painting some 
spokes to show me how. Of course I thought I could do 
it better than he, and commenced my job, starting on 
the wheels. When I came to the lower end of the hub I 
had to get down on my knees, and finally on my back, to 
paint the under side. It was now noon and quite warm, 
and when I left for dinner I told Peters that this would 
not turn out as easy a job as I had bargained for. 
' ' Oh, well, ' ' he replied, ' ' when you come from dinner I 
shall have the axle on stools, so that you can turn the 
wheels and you will find it easier. ' ' 

On returning I found it so adjusted. 

How nice! By turning the wheels I could paint the 
hubs and fellies by merely holding the brush on them; 



XX Introduction 

and to still further lighten my labor I procured a soap 
box and sat down to my work. This pleased me so that 
I had to give vent to my feelings by singing all the songs 
I could remember, and could be heard all over our quiet 
village. I know that John Nagle had not yet been born, 
else I might not have had the courage. After the hubs 
and fellies were finished, I tried to paint the spokes in 
the same way, but soon stopped this, as it bespattered 
me with paint. 

My first day's labor done, I went home for supper. 
Mother noticed some red spots on my pants and asked 
whether I had nose bleeding. I explained that it was 
paint from painting a wagon for John Peters, for which 
he was to pay me one shilling. "Why, boy, you leave 
that alone; you will spoil ten times more on your 
clothes than you get." 

I corrected her by saying that I had never paid a 
cent for my clothes yet, and would be one shilling ahead 
after my job was done. Besides, I should not like to 
back out of my first job. Then my father, who heard 
us from the adjoining room, said: "Johnny is right. 
Never back out of a bargain, even if a bad one ; keep up 
a good reputation to the end. It will finally pay best. ' ' 
"You had better give him one of your old aprons," he 
advised mother. This settled it. I went regularly to 
my work, and in about three days had the wagon 
painted. 

Peters examined the work and pronounced it splen- 
did. But I contradicted him and said that the wagon 
was really incomplete. It ought not be sent out of the 
shop before it was striped. "Yes," he said, "I know, 
but I can't afford it." "Afford it? I can't afford to 



Introduction xxi 

paint the whole wagon for one shilling, either; but I 
have done it, nevertheless, to keep up my reputation. 
As this is the first wagon you send out as a sample, I 
will stripe the body black, the box yellow, and scroll 
the corners, all for four shillings extra. ' ' 

"Why boy, what do you think, four times more than 
painting the whole wagon! I am not making that on 
the whole wagon." "Perhaps not, but I am not mak- 
ing anything on my job either. Besides, this was 
daubing; but when it comes to artistic work you must 
know that it is expensive; some little twelve by twelve 
painting costs thousands of dollars, while a whole town 
can be painted red for a song. Now, because your first 
wagon is partly my creation, I will throw in a sunflower 
on the dash-board, a forget-me-not on the tail-board, 
and John Peters either on top or below the forget-me- 
not. So you may have it, forget-me-not John Peters, 
or John Peters forget-me-not. Would this not be an 
advertiser, rolling down hill and dale, through forest 
and plain, with always the same refrain, 'forget-me- 
not John Peters,' costing you only four shillings, while 
you pay as many dollars to have it in cold print which 
no one notices? No, no, you cannot send your firstborn 
so naked into the cold world. I know you have more 
feeling than that, and besides, your reputation would 
be blasted forever. The artistic work on that wagon is 
worth as many dollars as I ask in shillings, and because 
I have become attached to it is the only reason I do it 
so cheap." 

But all my persuasion was in vain; he could not af- 
ford it. So he paid me the first shilling I ever earned, 
and the first wagon I ever painted rolled down the ages 



xxii Introduction 

in an unfinished state, of which. I wash my hands in in- 
nocence. 

This is how I earned my first shilling by work, long 
and persistent work, and I suppose it would be more 
interesting to show how I earned my first one hundred 
dollars, or my first one thousand dollars, from the experi- 
ence of which you might derive a greater benefit. But 
this is another story and would embrace a period of over 
sixty years, too long to tell here. 

This shilling was my first nestling for further ac- 
cumulation. Whether I saved it, and whether it is still 
a part of what I now possess, I don't remember; but I 
do know that strict economy in my younger days con- 
tributed more to what I now possess than the earning 
of it. 

FIRST LARGE FINANCIAL TRANSACTION 

Now allow me to give you my first important financial 
transaction, on the outcome of which might have rested 
my future weal or woe. 

This happened in the year 1857, the financial panic 
year. Many banks and commercial houses failed, hard 
times prevailed, and credit was guardedly extended. 
The merchants at that time had to lay in their stock of 
goods in the fall to last them until navigation opened 
in the spring. My father was fearful lest we had not 
enough money to pay up the old debts we owed to the 
merchants, for they would not trust us for the supply 
of goods required for our winter stock. The navigation 
season would soon close. No money to pay our debts. 
What should we do? 

Somehow we learned that a teacher near Clarks Mills 



Introduction xxiii 

had some money to loan. I was at once sent to apply 
for it. The roads were terribly rough. I started in a 
buekboard in the morning, and arrived at a little house 
on a hill where I was told the school teacher boarded. 
On entering I found the sole occupant, a lady, prepar- 
ing dinner. I introduced myself, and inquired for the 
teacher. She told me he was at the school, but would 
soon be home for his dinner. She pointed to the school 
house, not far distant. I went out to meet him, as I 
was too bashful, or too proud, to disclose in her presence 
my beggarly mission. I saw the children come tumbling 
out of school. Soon my fate would be settled. There 
he comes. Now take courage. ' ' Good-day, sir. Excuse 
me, are you Mr. Fleming ? I am glad to see you. I was 
sent by my father to ask whether you have some money 
to loan." He asked how much I wanted. I answered, 
Yankee fashion (he was a down-easterner), by asking 
how much he had. He replied, "Well, I may have five 
hundred dollars." "All right, I will take it all." At 
my eager, grasping answer he looked startled, and it 
came near defeating my negotiations. But it taught me 
a lesson, that when you want a thing, don't be too eager 
to get it. 

He said he knev/ Sehuette's store, but not that I was 
a son of the owner. "That is so, I will identify myself 
when we get into the house." It was now dinner time, 
and the farmer (I think his name was Evenson) told 
him that I was Sehuette's son (not in Norwegian cus- 
tom, in one word, but the son of John Sehuette), and 
that he considered us all right. After we had eaten din- 
ner, I took out a blank note with my father's signature. 
"Now," he said, "before we proceed any farther it must 



xxiv Introduction 

be understood that it will be repaid in, gold, the same 
as I shall give you, in six months from date, which will 
be the time school is closed and when I shall return 
east again, and the interest is to be twelve per cent." 
All of which I heartily agreed to. , 

I saw at once he knew more about drawing up a legal 
paper than I did, for he wrote in the note, "We 
jointly and severally promise to pay," and made me 
sign it, too, by which he had bound both father and son, 
and had elevated my importance. 

I got my five hundred dollars, all in twenty-dollar 
gold pieces, which was the largest amount I had ever 
carried. Although it was uncomfortably heavy, I drove 
homeward rejoicing over my first successful financial 
venture. As I could only drive at a slow pace, it grad- 
ually became dark, and my ardor cooled, and on coming 
to a secluded spot, it chilled. But I arrived home all 
right. Again I was in a plight as to where to put the 
money, as we had no safe. But I managed to hide it, 
and after a restless night, boarded the boat for Mil- 
waukee, paid off the debt, and bought our winter stock. 

In the spring the teacher received his gold again, and 
went home, while I attended strictly to my business. 

Now let me lead you to the 

ROAD TO WEALTH 

Following it may not bring you to the million dollar 
corner; but even if you should not be so fortunate, it 
will not impair your happiness as long as you possess 
enough to keep you comfortable, beyond want and 
worry, and with good prospects for the future. 

When you enter this road to wealth, keep always in 
sight and mind these guide posts. 



Introduction 



A dollar saved counts more than one hundred dollars 
made and spent. Saving in the earlier days is most 
effective, as shown by the following table. 

Suppose at the age of eighteen years, you place one 
hundred dollars at four per cent compound interest. 
Adding to this one hundred dollars each year, this will 
amount to, as per table below: — 









TABLE 






Showing the accumulation, at the end of each year, and each 


year after the 


age of 18 years (cents 

At Age 


omitted). 






Investment 


18 years $100.00 Investment 


At Age 


End of 1st year 


19 


104.00 End of 51st year 


69 years $16,612.00 




" 2d 


20 • 


212.00 


' " 52d " 


70 


17,376.00 




' " 3d 


21 


325.00 


' ■' 53d " 


71 


18.171.00 




' " 4th " 


22 


442.00 


" 54th " 


72 


18,998.00 




' " 5th " 


23 


563.00 


' " 55th " 


73 


19,858.00 




• " 6th " 


24 


690.00 


• •■ 56th •• 


74 


" 20,752.00 




• '■ 7th •' 


25 


821.00 


• " 57th '• 


75 


" 21,682.00 




• " 8th " 


26 


958.00 


'• 58th " 


76 


" 22,650.00 




' " 9th •• 


27 


1,101.00 


' " 59th " 


77 


" 23,656! 00 




' " 10th " 


28 


1,249.00 


• " 60th ■• 


78 


" 24,702.00 




' " 11th " 


29 


1 403 00 


• " 61st " 


79 


25,790.00 




' ■' 12th •' 


30 


1563 00 


■ " 62d '• 


80 


26,922.00 




• " 13th " 


31 


1729 00 


' " 63d •• 


81 


28,098.00 




' " 14th " 


32 


1902! 00 ' 


■ " 64th •■ 


82 


29,322.00 




' " 15th " 


33 


2^082 ! 00 


• " 65th " 


83 


30,595.00 




' " 16th " 


34 


2,270.00 


' " 66th •• 


84 


" 31,919.00 




■ " 17th " 


35 


2.465.00 


' " 67th " 


85 


" 33,296.00 




' •• 18th •' 


36 


2,667.00 


• " 68th •■ 


86 


" 34,728.00 




• " 19th " 


37 


2,878.00 


■ " 69th " 


87 


" 36 217 00 




' •• 20th " 


38 


3,097.00 


' ■■ 70th '• 


88 


37,766.00 




' " 21st " 


39 


3,325.00 


' '• 71st " 


89 


39,376.00 




• " 22d " 


40 


3,562.00 


' " 72d •■ 


90 


41,051.00 




• " 23d " 


41 


3,808.00 


• " 73d " 


91 


42,793.00 




' " 24th " 


42 


4,065.00 


■ " 74th " 


92 


44,605.00 




' " 25th " 


43 


4,331.00 


' •• 75th •• 


93 


46,489.00 




• •• 26th '■ 


44 


■ 4 608 00 


' " 76th " 


94 


48,449.00 




■ " 27th " 


45 


4*897! 00 


' " 77th " 


95 






• " 28th " 


46 


5,197.00 


• " 78th " 


96 


" 52!606!00 




' " 29th '■ 


47 


5,508.00' 


• " 79th " 


97 


" 54,811 00 




' " 30th ■■ 


48 


5,833.00 


■ " 80th " 


98 


57,103.00 




• " 31st " 


49 


6,170.00 


' " 81st 


99 


59,487.00 




." ;; ^^^ ','. 


50 


6,521.00 


" 82d " 


100 


61,967.00 






51 


6,886.00 


' " 83d " 




64,545.00 




• •• 34th " 


52 


7,265.00 


• ■' 84th " 




67,227.00 




" 35th " 


53 


7,660.00 


• " 85th •' 




70.016.00 




• " 36th '• 


54 


8,070.00 


• •• 86th " 




72,917.00 




■ " 37th " 


55 


8,497.00 


■ " 87th '• 




75,934.00 




• " 38th " 


56 


8,941.00 


• ■■ 88th " 




79,071.00 




• •• 39th " 


57 


; 9,403.00 


■ " 89th ■' 




82,334.00 




• " 40th " 


58 




■ " 90th " 




85,727.00 




• '• 41st " 


59 


10 382.00 


" 91st " 




89,256.00 




• •■ 42d •■ 


60 


10)901! 00 


" 92d 




92.927.00 




■ " 43d •• 


61 


11,44 .00 


' " 93d 




96.744.00 




■ " 44th '■ 


62 


12,003.00 


• " 94th •• 




... 100,714.00 




• " 45th " 


63 


12,587.00 


' " 95th •■ 




104,842.00 




• " 46th '• 


64 


13.195.00 


• " 96th " 




109.136.00 




' ■' 47th " 


65 


13,826.00 


' " 97th •• 




113,601.00 




• " 48th " 


66 


14,483.00 


' " 98th " 




118,245.00 




• •• 49th " 


67 


15,167.00 


■ '• 99th " 




123,075.00 




' " 50th " 


68 


15,877.00 


• "100th •■ 




... 128,098.00 



xxvi Introduction 

These figures may be surprising to many. They show 
the importance of early savings, which therefore should 
be inculcated in the lives of children. This habit can 
best be taught by getting them directly interested 
in what they spend or save, so that they will feel and 
know how it will affect their little pocket books. For 
this reason I would advise that every boy or girl, from 
the age of twelve years, should be given a certain allow- 
ance each year. What this allowance ought to be, 
should be determined by keeping an account for two 
years preceding, of what the child may have cost, for 
all except board. If the average for the two years has 
been, say, thirty dollars a year, this should be the allow- 
ance for the coming year, adding thereto, say, five to 
ten dollars, as a margin for saving. This margin is 
imx)ortant, as otherwise, when the child discovers that 
no saving could be made in any event, it would have no 
incentive to try to save at all, and would soon declare it- 
self bankrupt, and fall back on pa again. Then the child 
should keep a book in which should be entered all it 
purchased and paid for, and credit the allowance from 
time to time, and at the end of the year a balance struck, 
which would show the savings, if any. 

In this way a child would derive great enjoyment, 
especially if it could show a saving. How much pleas- 
ure would it be if it could give pa or ma a little present 
from its own savings. In addition to this, it would be- 
come more systematic, accurate, and independent, and 
learn bookkeeping. The allowance may be increased as 
the child grows older, or as circumstances may permit. 
If the savings grow from year to year, the more inter- 
esting will they appear. The only thing to be feared is 



Introduction xxvii 

that a child may be too saving, and become penurious ; 
but it is easier to correct this than to correct extrava- 
gance. 

In this manner a child can easily have saved the one 
hundred dollars by its eighteenth birthday, the amount 
for starting in the table above given. This would be a 
great incentive. Now let me see how different a child 's 
habit must become, as most are now brought up. What 
interest has a child in savings when its parents provide 
for all its wants ? It even does not know or care what is 
the cost. What doee it care if it uses more or less, as it 
cannot lose or gain? 

But when you say, ''Now John, or Eose, I will give 
you so much for your next year's expenses. This is 
more than you used last year, and from now on you 
must pay for everything you use except board. Now 
see how much you can save from it," you will be 
surprised how much more the child will value a dollar, 
how it will fondle it, begin to figure and plan to save 
it, so that little savings may grow bigger, and how much 
more interesting life will be to it. 

Before dismissing this subject, I wish to impress on 
all the importance of engrafting into a child the habit 
of saving while young, as a sapling can be bent into al- 
most any shape or direction, but not after it has grown 
to an unbendable size. 

This refers to saving and bookkeeping by young 
people; but it applies equally to the older, except that 
they, like large trees, are not so easily bent from their 
former shape and habits. 

Bookkeeping in all lines of business, as well as in all 
other occupations', will tend to instil economy. It will 



xxviii Introduction 

also make your labors more interesting. You will not 
be on a road groping in the dark to find your way, or to 
know where you stand. Bookkeeping will be like sunlight 
to you, which will always illuminate your way, and 
by which you can better determine how slow or how fast 
you progress, and can estimate beforehand about where 
you will land. 

MY FIRST TRIAL BALANCE 

I remember when I first kept books. This was in the 
hard-times year 1857-1858. My father gave to my older 
brother and myself the little stock of goods he had, and 
said: "Now, boys, you run the store. You provide for 
the family, and all you make above this is yours." A 
year from that time, Jan. 1, 1858, I struck my first bal- 
ance-sheet, and found a clear balance of $125.00. This 
was our first year 's net gain. "What a pleasurable event. 
I rejoice every time when I think of it. My happiness 
drove me to run pell-mell to my brother-in-law, Aug- 
ust Baensch, whom I asked, "What do you think we 
cleared last year?" "You mean lost." "Oh no, we 
cleared $125.00, which is the amount we have more than 
we had last year. Here, look at my trial balance." 
Never since have I been so happy and contented, though 
the results showed only a small fraction of what I made 
in later years. 

I will now give you a brief plan of 

DOUBLE ENTRY BOOKKEEPING 

which is a most interesting study and is not hard to 
master. The representative accounts confuse at first, 
and the best way is to have these in mind as being per- 



Introduction xxix 

sons; and bear in mind that you must charge or debit 
a person, or a representative account, what you give it, 
and credit a person, or a representative account, what 
you get or take from it. As cash will be the most fre- 
quent customer you have to deal with, you will soon get 
on intimate terms, and say, "Mr. Cash, here is ten dol- 
lars. ' ' This then, you will debit cash with. And if this 
ten dollars was received by labor, or salary, you will 
credit labor, or salary account, as the case may be, or 
income account, if you keep no other. 

You may soon have occasion to say, ' ' Mr. Cash, please 
give me ten dollars. ' ' This you will credit cash account, 
and if you paid out five dollars of this for coal, and five 
dollars for a chair, you must charge family expense ac- 
count five dollars, and furniture account five dollars. 

Now you must not ask Mr. Cash for more money 
than he has, because he would think you either impu- 
dent to ask it when you knew he owed you nothing, or 
a fool, because you did not know Mr. Cash was pumped 
dry, and had nothing to give, even if he wanted to. 

In married life it is always best to give your wife 
a monthly allowance of say fifty dollars, or as much as 
you can afford, out of which she is supposed to pay all 
ordinary household expenses. "Whatever she saves of 
this is hers, and what she loses is yours. But as she 
knows there will be a rumpus if she taxes you for the 
loss, she will try to live within her income ; and of course, 
if she cannot, and strikes, as a reasonable husband you 
will arbitrate gladly to avoid a lockout. 

At the end of a year your wife's account, and all 
other special accounts actually used for the maintenance 
of the family, must be transferred to and charged to 



XXX Introduction 

profit and loss account. And after taking an inventory, 
all accounts must be balanced, and a trial balance made, 
wMch. will give you a clear insight as to what married 
life has cost, and how you stand financially. Life in- 
surance premium paid should not be treated as an ex- 
pense, but as an asset, charging the company the amount 
paid. 

For a family, single entry bookkeeping will be- all 
sufficient, which may be changed to double entry at any 
time during, or at the end of the year, by merely jour- 
nalizing and posting from the single entries. In single 
entry you will only need an expenditure and income ac- 
count. 

I want to impress on all the importance of bookkeep- 
ing in some form, which I am sure will instil economy 
and accuracy, and give you a clear insight of your 
affairs, which you cannot have without it. I must also 
impress upon you most forcibly, never, never keep a 
speculative account, which is invariably a losing one. 
The moral of all this is : — 

8ave in your earlier days. 

So you must reap the fruit 

Which if too long delayed 

Will not 'be ripe for you. 
Now let us follow the lives of John and Rose, who, as 
they pass along the road of married life, will reveal 
whatever success they met by strictly adhering to the 
rule of economy, their conciliatory interchange of views 
on different questions, and how they traveled through 
life with the largest possible measure of pleasure and 
contentedness. 



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J0l|n mh Ua&t 



CHAPTER I. 

Engagement and Marriage. They Discuss How to Finance 
the Family Expenses 

WHEN John was 23 and Kose 18 years of age they 
were engaged to be married. As this was the 
most romantic period in their lives, they were naturally 
enamoured by it. Their happiness so overflowed that 
they felt their friends would be likewise affected if they 
were aware of it. 

To make the announcement in the usual way, by sen ^- 
ing out somber, black printed cards, seemed to John too 
prosaic, too much like a business announcement. He had 
conceived an innovation more appropriate for such 
occasions, and felt exultant over having discovered it. 
The only obstacle to carrying out his plan was the ex- 
pense, which, according to his means was rank extrava- 
gance, wholly at variance with his intention, which was 
to enter and maintain married life by the strictest rules 
of economy by which others might profit. Nothing 
could be more inconsistent with his plans than to dis- 
play extravagance at the very beginning. This annoyed 
him. After some deliberation he found an excuse for 
his extravagance, which was, that he and Rose could only 



4 John and Rose 

' ' With this income I can give you an allowance of $50 
a month, out of which you must pay the ordinary run- 
ning expenses of the household, which include rent, 
fuel, light, all repairs inside of the house, and your owm 
wearing apparel. I will pay for incidentals for my own 
use, purchase my clothes, pay all expenses outside of 
the house, and will buy the furniture, which latter, how- 
ever, will be an asset. By this arrangement you will 
be spared the necessity of asking me for every dollar 
that you need, and it will obviate many little domestic 
irritations, besides giving you a chance to save money 
from your allowance. 

"You can discuss the plan that I suggest with your 
parents, and if it is agreeable you can let me know 
in a few days." 

Rose naively brushed away John's fears, saying: 
"My father and mother will b© delighted with my pros- 
pects; they will be pleased to see us married and I am 
sure that the quicker we are married the better they 
will like it." 

John doubted Rose's desire to consult her parents. 
Not wishing to have any after misunderstandings and 
chagrins, he stepped into the adjoining room to lay be- 
fore them his financial resources and his domestic 
plans. These were entirely satisfactory to them, and the 
wedding took place on Washington's birthday. 

Instead of taking an expensive wedding trip they used 
the money to lay in household supplies. They made 
a selection of the necessary furniture, costing $150, for 
which John gave a check for $75, leaving a balance of 
$75 to be paid later. Having provided his part for the 
household, Rose must provide her part, though John had 



Engagement and Marruge 5 

not yet paid her her allowance. Here she for the first 
time agreeably surprised him by telling him that she 
had saved and deposited in the savings bank $200. But 
she had no cheek blanks, and, as both needed a little 
pocket money they called at the savings bank, where 
John gave her a check for $50 for her first month's al- 
lowance, after which he drew another check for $5 for 
his pocket money. He made it a practice of transact- 
ing all his business by check, and he intended to con- 
tinue this method because the checks are returned to him 
whenever the bank balances his bank book, and show what 
they were given for. When he gets his bank book bal- 
anced each year he will enter them in his own book. The 
only bookkeeping required is to enter the small disburse- 
ments from his pocket money. 

Eose deposited her first allowance of $50 at the sav- 
ings bank, and opened a new checking account. Out 
of this she drew $10 for pocket money. 

Having transacted their little banking business, they 
went to the house they had selected as their home. Rose 
immediately sent a check to the owner for $10 for a 
month's rent. Then she bought groceries for $8 and 
coal for $7. For these items she also gave checks on 
her bank. For small purchases, such as meat, 50 cents, 
and milk, 10 cents, she paid cash. Like John, she need 
not keep up an account for purchases she paid by checks, 
but only for those incidentals she bought for cash and 
received receipts. These sundry items she posted when 
she had time. 

They now settled in their new home and their house- 
keeping began in the most auspicious manner. 

John each month regularly deposited in the bank his 



6 John and Eose 

$75 salary, gave Eose a check for $50 allowance, and 
checked out $5 cash for himself. 

Eose deposited her $50 in the savings bank, and 
checked out $10 cash and other items as occasion re- 
quired. After they had been married for some time 
they came to the first stream, to the first obstruction 
which needed bridging to cross. While John was busily 
occupied with his work one day, the doctor handed him 
a bill for $10 for services. John, knowing that these 
services were rendered to Eose, told him to present the 
bill to her, which the doctor did with explanations. She 
told the doctor to leave the bill and call again ; she must 
adjust this affair with her husband. 

When John came home Eose upbraided him for send- 
ing the doctor to collect a bill from her. 

John said, "Oh, I know the $50 allowance will not 
settle everything, and that we will have to adjust and 
establish precedents for many other bills. The unravel- 
ing of these tangles may educate us in legal procedure, 
and prove interesting diversions in our daily life. If 
you recall, I told you, you must pay from your allow- 
ance for all repairs inside of the house, and as this is 
one of them you must admit that you ought to pay the 
bill." 

But Eose did not admit it. She answered, "You 
should gladly pay the doctor, because you know that he 
is through with me, and I am well again. Is it not bad 
enough that I had to suffer ? Then why should you ask 
me to pay for my sufferings? The doctor told me that 
worry is dangerous to a sick person. If I had known 
that I had to pay my own doctor's bills I would have 
worried myself to death. If this had happened, then, 



Engagement and Marriage 7 

in addition to doctor's bills, there would have been fu- 
neral expenses for you to discharge, and in addition you 
would have suffered an irreparable loss. Therefore you 
should rejoice that you are privileged to pay the doctor. 
Is this not so?" 

John knew something of the injurious effects of worry, 
and agreed that she was right in this regard; but he 
insisted that the rule must work both ways, so it was mu- 
tually agreed that the precedent be established that John 
should pay Eose's doctor bills and Rose should pay 
John's. On this basis each would be more solicitous of 
the health of the other, and Eose would be the gainer, 
because a wife's medical bills are generally larger than 
her husband's. 

Thanksgiving day was approaching, and Eose was 
thinking that as she had not seen her relatives since her 
wedding day, to visit them would be a pleasure. As 
John had not the time to accompany her she figured that 
the expense for her alone would be about $6. It struck 
her that this might be another stream to cross, but con- 
vinced herself that John should bear the expense. "Is 
this a household expense? No. A repair account? No. 
Must I bear the expense ? No ! No ! " 

When John came homC' she told him of her intended 
trip, and asked him for the $6 required to make it. John 
demurred, "Why, this is for your own pleasure, and as 
I can derive none from it, but on the contrary must do 
the cooking and dishwashing, and keep the house in or- 
der while you are gone, I don 't think you should expect 
me to pay for it. ' ' 

Eose, however, argued that it was not a household 
expense, not an expense inside the house, which his rule 



§ John and Rose 

called for, but an obligation outside of the house, which 
he agreed to discharge. She could not see how he could 
get around it. 

John realized that it was an extraordinary case, re- 
quiring extraordinary diplomacy to adjust. After some 
mental effort he suggested the following compromise : 

"Rose, I have an ideal solution of this difficulty, 
which will keep our life a perpetual honeymoon, by 
which you and I will continue to be as sweet to each 
other as a girl is to the one whom she hopes will in\dte 
her to a ball. Here is my solution: If you go alone 
on Thanksgiving day, when I cannot accompany you, you 
must pay your own expenses; but if you wait until 
Christmas, when I have time to go with you, I will 
invite you to be my guest, and in that case I will bear 
the expense. You will observe that by this rule we will 
be more inclined to be sweet to each other in the hope 
of being invited to travel, you might, if I were very 
pleasant to you, invite me. By such sacrifice I would 
enjoy the trip so much the more. ' ' Rose thought favor- 
ably of the proposition, because she knew her invi- 
tation to John would be remote, and she felt that she 
could easily entice him to invite her. Thus was the 
second precedent established: the one who invites 
the other to make a joint trip must pay the expenses; 
if John travels alone he must pay his own expenses; 
if Rose travels alone — ! Well, this question of expense 
is left to her adroitness to inveigle John to open his 
pocketbook. 

Again they pursued the even tenor of their ways. 
Rose wondered what stream they would encounter next. 
The horizon was not clouded, but in her imagination she 



Engagement and Marriage 9 

hoped and believed that they would confront the largest, 
yet the dearest and most dangerous of them all, this 
being an addition to their family. There was no indica- 
tion of one at that time, and there never might be one, 
but if there were, who would shoulder the burden? Is 
it an inside household expense ? No ; it is an inside home 
asset. May not John regard it as an expensive asset? 
She pondered and argued on it with fond anticipation, 
but in spite of all mental efforts she could not solve the 
question, and waited for John's return when they 
would discuss it. When John arrived home they quietly 
discussed this question. There being no stream in 
sight, there was no need for an immediate decision. 
John admitted that this was a natural and important 
condition, which by all means must be provided for, and 
he expressed the idea that when they got another part- 
ner the best way would be to organize a stock company. 
As his firm had just incorporated as a stock company, 
his mind was entirely engrossed by it. 

Rose was horrified. "Do you want to put us down 
like stock on a farm?" she asked. 

"No, no!" John said, "not in that sense," and he 
thereupon explained. 

"When two people join who are well acquainted with 
each other they generally form a partnership ; but when 
one or more members are added they organize themselves 
into a stock company, for the reason that a partnership 
carries with it an unlimited liability. Supposing a part- 
nership has a capital of $10,000, of which A carries 
$7,000 and B $3,000, and B has $20,000 in addition to 
the $3,000 in other property, while A has nothing more 
than his $7,000 stock. Then supposing the partnership 



10 John and Rose 

had extraordinarily unfortunate losses, which not only 
wiped out their $10,000, but much more. In such a case 
B would not only have lost his $3,000 capital, but he 
might lose his $20,000 besides. On the other hand, if 
the partnership had been an incorporated stock company 
B could not lose more than his $3,000 stock and his 
$20,000 would be saved to him. 

"As our prospective partner would come to us stark 
naked, not adding a penny to our finances, but on the 
contrary adding to our expenses, and in the future 
might by misfortune or otherwise create a liability 
which would absorb our little savings which it has taken 
us years to scrape together, therefore it occurred to me 
that we ought to organize a little^ stock company with 
the capital we have, say $1,000. Supposing that such 
an unfortunate liability should confront us at a time we 
had saved quite an amount : we could not lose more than 
our $1,000 stock and our savings above this would be 
intact. ' ' 

Rose thought this a capital idea, believing John had 
proven himself a shrewd financier, and her anxiety over 
the financial aspect when the prospective partner should 
arrive was somewhat relieved. 

John had to go to his work, therefore they postponed 
their discussion of this problem to another time. 

After he had gone Rose's mind was troubled over 
the problem of the stock company, and the proposed 
benefits which John had disclosed. She doubted that his 
definition of the law was correct, and feared it would 
not apply in their case. 



CHAPTER II. 

Rose a Suffragist. Explains it to John. Challenges Him to Debate 

AFTER John had left, another idea entered Rose's 
mind. She was a suffragist, and at the club meeting 
she had heard the principle discussed, that the state 
must pro%dde for the maintenance of all children, because 
they are the life of the state, without which a community 
or nation must die. Therefore, as the nation derives the 
benefits, it ought to carry the expense. 

On Sunday when John was home she believed it a 
favorable opportunity to launch this new idea. She 
said, ''John, I have been trying to digest the alleged 
benefits of your stock company. Are you sure of your 
construction of the law? Possibly in our case the law 
will not apply." 

John admitted that the point was well taken, and 
promised to consult a lawyer about it. 

"Never mind," said Rose, "I have thought the mat- 
ter over, and gathered a new idea. Have you noticed 
that in France there is a fear that the nation may be- 
come depopulated owing to a decreasing birth and an 
increasing death rate, that this fear is extending to the 
United States, and that our attention is being called to 
this alarming condition? This question was discussed 
at our woman suffrage club and it was resolved — 

" 'That, whereas the state derives more benefit from 
the production of children than do their parents; 

" 'Therefore be it resolved, that the state should pay 
11 



12 John and Eose 

a premium for each child born, and for its mainte- 
nance, as follows: First bom, $50; second, $100; third, 
$150 ; fourth, $200 ; fifth, $250 ; sixth, $300. For main- 
tenance the state should pay: First year, $5; second, 
$10 ; third, $15 ; and an additional $5 each year up to 
fourteen years, ' ' ' 

John felt relieved by the hope that this resolution 
might become law, but he wanted to know what about 
twins and triplets? "Why cut out all born after the 
sixth, and why put $5 the minimum for maintenance ? 

She explained that the first year for maintenance was 
low because the premium made up the deficiency. The 
twins and triplets were ruled out of order. The 
reason for stopping state bonuses after six births was 
because more than six children should not be encour- 



John thought this an equitable plan. He said it 
would greatly relieve the poor, who have to bear nearly 
the whole burden of supplying the nation's citizens, 
while they can least afford it. Such a reform would be 
the greatest of the age. He wondered that it was not 
thought of before. 

Rose was pleased and encouraged to unfold more of 
the reform measures discussed at the club. She contin- 
ued, ''We have also expressed ourselves for universal 
peace. Is it not absurd that civilized nations which 
for generations have discarded the barbarous law that 
might makes right and substituted for physical 
supremacy law courts where disputes between citizens 
shall be settled instead of by brute force, that these 
very nations, when disputing between themselves, order 



KosE A Suffragist 13 

their citizens to suspend their obedience to law, just 
long enough to whip or be whipped by the enemy? 
They command their soldiers to kill, maim, and burn 
by the wholesale, to rob and ruin the enemy; the 
more killed, the vaster the ruin, the greater the glory. 
Yet after the carnage those who have survived it shall 
resume their former civilized life? Is this not prepos- 
terous?" 

That war is the wickedest crime, 
The greatest curse to all mankind, 
Is known to all; and yet it reigns. 
To all nations a 'burning shame. 

"The enormous cost of warfare, the waste, the suffer- 
ing, and the demoralizing effects, are too dreadful for 
the human mind to fathom. The cost of war might be 
sufficient to maintain the children of a nation and pro- 
vide old age pensions. 

''We have many other splendid reform measures in 
reserve, and we will bring them out as soon as favorable 
opportunities offer. We will fight for our principles, 
and I intend to go on the stump for them. When I 
think that you men, the lords of creation, the legis- 
lators and makers of all our laws from time immemorial, 
have never inaugurated reforms such as we now propose, 
always in your power to do at any tinie, is something 
beyond my comprehension. It must be attributed to 
incapacity, reluctant brains, a lack of progressiveness, 
a disregard of the general welfare, unsympathetic hearts. 

"We women, at the threshold of our political careers, 



14 John and Bose 

have worked out measures which you men could not dis- 
cover in all the ages. Doesn't this clearly demonstrate 
that women should have equal political rights with men ? ' ' 

John had listened with amazement to her eloquence. 
He had had in mind at some future time to run for the 
assembly and go on the stump, but now he felt like 
thirty cents, swamped, crushed by his wife's eloquence. 
Who could stand up before such a loaded battery with- 
out being riddled and swept from earth? He was 
cowed ; he- felt the suffragists could sweep the floor with 
him. He was so confused that he had to calm his brain 
before he could make reply. 

After a pause Rose asked, "Well, what do you think 
of our reform?" 

John said, "Think? I am trying to get my thinking 
machine in motion." 

John felt like an auto engine which has lost its spark. 
He cranked and cranked until he believed he was a 
crank, but it was no go. "Well, ' ' he said, "you must ex- 
cuse me until some other day, when I recover my spark 
and get my thinking machinery in condition to pro- 



This was the first time he became aware that his wife 
was a suffragist. At his work all day long he heard 
politics, politics, and now that his wife was getting 
loaded with it more and more, his home was turned into 
a political wigwam. Heretofore he had only simple po- 
litical hash to digest, but now that his wife was a suf- 
fragist he had to digest political rehash, and that with 
a humiliated mind. He dare not express the mildest 
aversion toward it. His wife continued her oratory on 
politics, and it was getting on his nerves. He tried to 



Rose a Suffragist 15 

switch her off onto other subjects, but he could not shift 
her from the main track. The result of his wife 's polit- 
ical activity was that John lessened the time he spent in 
her company, and sought diversion elsewhere. 

Eose became impatient for an answer to her query, 
why he was opposed to woman suffrage, as he had ad- 
mitted that the suffragists had splendid principles, 

John evaded a specific reply by saying that he was 
opposed to it on general principles, that it would drag 
the women in the mire of politics, just like it does men. 

But Rose was persistent. No generalities satisfied 
her. She demanded specific reasons. She crowded him 
to the wall, and when John found himself in the comer 
he took refuge in the statement that the question was 
too big. "I must prepare myself," he said, "and at 
some future time I will present my argument against it. ' ' 

John went and came, and when he and his wife were 
together the conversation was strained and uncongenial. 
Rose was ever eager to discuss politics^ but John dodged 
the question. 

His promised answer he postponed as long as pos- 
sible, because he dreaded to confront the intellectual lion 
in debate. When walking home time and again he re- 
hearsed his anti-woman suffrage arguments, with which 
he hoped to floor his vsdfe. Invariably after supper when 
he intended to launch them forth, he collapsed. 

He had read that some orators take a stimulant by 
which their mental faculties are spurred to the utmost, 
and under such influences make their best speeches. So 
on his way home he stepped into a saloon and took a 
drink of brandy just for a feeler. But after supper 
the effect had gone. "Ah!" he thought, "the brandy 



16 John and Rose 

had evaporated and had been absorbed by supper time. 
I must take it after supper, immediately preceding my 
arguments, when it is still busy in my brain. ' ' 

The following day on his way home he bought a half 
pint of brandy and put it in the bathroom; but unfor- 
tunately Rose found it there. 

She smelled. She tasted. ' ' 0, horrors ! ' ' She accosted 
John and asked, "For God's sake, what is this brandy 
for?" 

John was apparently nonplused. "Brandy! brandy! 
Where ? 0, yes. The doctor prescribed it for me to rub 
my throat and neck to relieve my bronchitis. ' ' 

Rose thought this was a novel remedy, and asked 
John whether he took any stock in it, or had the doc- 
tor explained wherein lay the healing constituents. She 
then told him that as the next meeting of the women's 
club was to be held at the doctor 's wife 's home she would 
then ask the doctor regarding the curative properties of 
brandy. 

John got hot under the collar. "I am in for it," he 
mused. ' ' I must compound — heap one lie on top of the 
other, to get out of this. This is mortifying." He was 
in a quandary. If he left that lie to its own fate, and 
Rose queried the doctor to explain the healing prop- 
erties of brandy which he ' ' prescribed ' ' for her husband, 
the doctor, of course, would be dumfounded, and would 
deny having seen her husband for a month. If that 
happened, Rose, the doctor, and all the club women 
would brand him as an infernal liar, and then all his 
elaborate arguments against woman suffrage would be 
knocked into a cocked hat. John did the hardest think- 



Rose a Suffragist 17 

ing of his life, which is always the case when a person 
deals in lies. 

"0, what a tangled web we weave 
When we, practise to deceive!" 

Finally he got on a line of thought to save his repu- 
tation. He must see the doctor at once, but by the eter- 
nal! he would not lie to him. He would tell him the 
whole truth, just as the matter stands. And if there 
must be lying, he must do it for him. He is used to it 
and is paid for it. - He saw the doctor and told him 
frankly what had transpired and retained him to get 
him out of the hole. 

As he had thought about the case more than the doc- 
tor, he transferred to him the scheme he had concocted 
to enlighten his wife without lying. John told the doc- 
tor that when his wife asked him to explain the healing 
properties of brandy, which he said, he, the doctor, had 
prescribed for him, he should not give a direct answer, 
but instead, lecture her on the- healing properties of 
brandy when externally applied, dealing in high-toned 
medical terms and phrases which she could not under- 
stand. Then she would let the matter rest, without hav- 
ing been answered. 

The doctor, being an extreme anti-woman suffragist, 
gladly helped John out of his predicament. Shortly af- 
terwards, John being anxious to know how the doctor 
succeeded, called on him to see how he had smoothed 
matters over. 

"John," the doctor said, ''the problem was charm- 
ingly solved. Your wife became so bewildered by my 



18 John and Rose 

medical discourse that she almost fainted. I had to 
give her brandy to resuscitate her, and it gave her in- 
stant relief. After taking it she remarked, 'Brandy 
should be in every home.' " 

John, of course, felt tickled, yet he was dissatisfied 
when he recalled the torture his little lie had caused him, 
and how easily it could have been prevented, by merely 
saying to Rose that brandy was a necessity in every 
household, to be used in emergencies as a temporary 
stimulant. 



CHAPTER III. 

John Presents Ten Objections to Woman Suffrage. Rose Quarrels with 
Suffragists and Resigns 

ON arriving home John asked Rose how the doctor 
explained the brandy remedy. 

Rose replied, "The doctor is a highly educated Latin 
scholar. He was so deep that I nearly succumbed try- 
ing to fathom him. I fell into a mental whirlpool. He 
talked me silly. I was dazed by his argument, which no 
doubt, w^as designed, so as to enable him to prove the 
efficacy of the brandy remedy. When I was on the 
point of collapse, he' quickly got the bottle, poured the 
contents down my throat and revival was instantaneous. 
I tell you, brandy is the remedy to revive. But not as 
you said, externally, but internally — right down your 
throat." 

John felt serene that the brandy lie was completely 
washed away from his conscience by the brandy itself, 
whereby he could centralize his thoughts effectually on 
his reply to woman's suffrage. 

Rose had pestered him from day to day to argue his 
case, and as everything must come^ to an end, he de- 
cided to please her. After supper he lubricated his 
brain by taking a little brandy, and turned the wheels 
around to see if it resulted in smooth working. He felt 
confident that he would have smoother running in the 
crucial task before him. 

"Now my dear Rose," he began, "allow me to present 
the reasons why I am opposed to woman's suffrage. 
19 



20 John and Eose 

''First. I believe that in case women were asked to 
vote on the question whether they want equal political 
power with men, not one-third would vote ; and if all of 
them did vote the question would be defeated. 

"Second. If they should get the franchise, and vote 
as numerously as men do, it would double the expense 
of government, and also double the election franchise ex- 
penses to individuals, thus doubling the burden of ex- 
ercising the franchise without compensating benefits. 

"Third. The women would not feel as free to enjoy 
themselves as now. They would not be as happy and 
contented, because there would enter into their lives an 
added duty, which would cause more labor, more vexa- 
tion, more jealousy and more expense; expense many 
could not afford, especially the great class that struggle 
to make both ends meet. 

"Fourth. If the women, instead of voting should or- 
ganize an independent reform club, and when they have 
formulated a policy which they believe would promote 
the public welfare, bring such measure to the attention 
of the party in power, I am sure the appeal would be 
heeded. This has already been done. Such third party 
power would be more effective and would accomplish 
more good than would be accomplished by women 
voting. 

"Fifth. This strikes right home. You know what my 
income is ; you know how I had it carefully planned to 
live within this income and save a little. Now suppos- 
ing you go on the stump for woman's suffrage. This 
will require time and money — the time you must take 
from your household duties, and the money from your 
allowance or my savings. Don't you see that this will 



Ten Objections to Woman Suffrage 21 

completely disarrange our calculations and because of 
it we must suffer privations? Nothing influences a 
voter more than touching his pocket. This point, you 
will admit, is irrefutable. 

''Sixth. Now drawing on our imagination a step 
further, suppose that because of your beauty, charms and 
eloquence, you should be selected as the logical candidate 
for the assembly, and you get the nomination. You 
might at first decline because you had no time; but if 
they persist, alleging that you are the only one who can 
win, and the bee buzzed in your bonnet, and you were 
compelled to accept. You succumbi, and other ladies are 
nominated with you to fill other county offices. These 
candidates are composed of three ladies and six men. 
You canvass the county in autos together, stay out until 
late at night or don't come home 'til morning; and 
while you are doing this who is going to keep up my 
home ? We have no hired girl, and if we had, it might 
be worse for you. I am alone, I must cook my meals, 
starve, or board in a hotel. The first you don't want 
me to do, and the latter I cannot afford to do. But as 
you are a candidate you must fight it out. You battle 
nobly and every one tells you that you will win. You 
feel as good as elected. But the prophecy fails. After 
election you learn that you are snowed under, which 
chills you, so that my blooming Eose withers. Defeat 
will cause you to lose your loveliness, your warmth and 
charm. You will become sour and you and I must 
suffer; and all this on account of an ambition to vote 
and run for office. If you were elected it might be 
worse. 

"Seventh. Let us come nearer home. Suppose a 



22 John and Rose 

farmer 's wife is elected supervisor, and she has to board 
at the county seat when the board is in session — she 
mingles with the members — she likes company, and 
naturally she selects as her companions the nicest look- 
ing and the most congenial men she can attract. She is 
led into temptation, which the Scriptures tell us to 
avoid. Don't you see that such temptation may lead to 
demoralizing results, possibly to divorce? 

"Eighth. Let us suppose you are an alderman. You 
attend the committee and regular meetings of the coun- 
cil, at times getting home at 12 o'clock at night. Possi- 
bly some young, courteous member escorts you home, 
where I have been waiting for at least three hours. 
Don't you think that this would lessen our affection? 

'^ Ninth. I am reminded of a beautiful girl, so charm- 
ing that any young man would fall in love with ber on 
sight; but when you heard her speak, all her charms 
vanished, because her voice was coarse, deep and mascu- 
line. It struck me how a voice could transform one of 
beauty to one that is coarse and masculine. With this 
defect I could not see how anybody could fall in love 
with her and no one did. 

"Now, suppose that you are on the stump, having 
practiced and acquired the most effective stentorian 
voice, which all politicians strive for, and that I should 
happen to see you on the rostrum. You begin in modera- 
tion, but after a little applause you warm up until you 
lose control, walk up and down the stage, roar like a 
lion, clench your fist, pound the desk, tear your smooth 
hair into a mess. I would be horrified at the con- 
sequences. Under such conditions woman's suffrage 
would lessen marriages to an alarming extent. 



Ten Objections to Woman Suffrage 23 

"Tenth. Playing politics is a very expensive luxury. 
Ten per cent may in some way make a success of it, 
while 90 per cent lose by it, and 10 per cent of these 
latter are ruined by it. It is as dangerous to enlist in 
polities as it is to enlist in the army. More die from 
political service than from war service. Both are in a 
field where the greatest glory and honor are attained, 
and for this reason it is fascinating and tempting. For 
the love of women, to relieve them of these dangers, to 
lead them away from temptation, are the reasons why 
the men have taken the burden wholly upon themselves, 
which the women should appreciate and be thankful for. 

"You may say, 'We don't want office, only the vote.' 
But let me remind you that many, especially the rich, 
old maids and many others, have time to kill, money to 
burn and ambition to be in the limelight. These women 
will seek office as the men do and they would be the rul- 
ing spirits, and you and those in your class would have 
nothing to say, although you would be more entitled to 
the honors. 

"Don't you think that such degradation would make 
you and those in your class strain yourselves to get into 
office ? The natural sequence of woman suffrage is, that 
in time the women would become office seekers the same 
as men now are." 

Now that John was through he believed that he had 
made some impression on Rose and asked her what she 
thought about it. 

"Hold on," said Rose, "wait a little'. It took you a 
long time to prepare yourself to answer my few ques- 
tions, and I hope you will give me as much time to pre- 
pare myself to answer your elaborate arguments. 



24 John and Rose 

"But that part which you consider the most objection- 
able, the demoralizing effect of the sexes indiscrimi- 
nately mingling or mixing with each other, I will answer 
off-hand. This can easily be prevented. You men who 
have shown incapacity to rule, just get yourselves dis- 
franchised, and enfranchise the women ; then there will 
not be any mixing of the sexes. A pure woman's govern- 
ment, and I assure you it will be what the term implies, 
a pure woman's government." 

John queried Eose, "Is this all?" 

' ' Yes, for the present. ' ' 

John hoped that it would be closed for all time. He 
feared that she might keep the debate going like an end- 
less chain. He decided for the sake of peace to accept 
her proposition. Knowing that Rose's political somer- 
sault would not happen during their lifetime, he said, 
"Rose, I agree. I really think that as men have always 
controlled the government we can well afford to give you 
the reins, so that we can take a rest. We can look on 
and learn from the women how much better we can be 
governed. The only things that we men wish, to have re- 
tained are the referendum and recall. ' ' To this Rose had 
no objection and now they were' as 

''Two souls with hut a single thought, 
Two hearts that heat as one." 

Rose now cleaned the house from the dust and dirt 
that had accumulated, because she had had no time to 
keep it in order, owing to her political duties. At the 
same time she brushed away the political bee. From this 
time on the household ran along in a normal fashion, and 



Ten Objections to Woman Suffrage 25 

politics were only occasionally discussed, without fric- 
tional disturbance. 

Although Rose believed she had completely brushed 
the political bee from her mind, yet it sometimes buzzed 
whenever the club women visited her to inquire why she 
did not attend their meetings. She did not disclose to 
them that John's ten commandments had somewhat 
dampened her ardor, but gave them evasive answers. 
But when they told her that she was the leading spirit 
of the club, that it could not exist without her, and that 
she must attend the meetings, she at last consented, and 
told John that she could not well refuse them the little 
favor. 

After the first meeting Rose came home in an excited 
state of mind. Her cheeks were flushed and she was out 
of breath. She burst out: "How ridiculous!" (John 
knew the cause. She had to fight to maintain her 
rights.) She again began, "The idea! Just think! 

Mrs. A " John pleaded with her to wait till she got 

her breath and reserve her report of the battle for some 
future time. 

While John was in bed snoring. Rose lay awake in 
mental agony, lamenting that she did not say this or 
that in her debate. If she could confront them now, how 
completely would she sweep away all opposition. 

Next morning she was up early and called John, who 
knew it would be early. She was ready to make her 
report. She said, "You should have been at the club 
meeting last night. It is a wonder that the women did 
not come to blows. That they did not was because 
women have not yet acquired the fighting spirit of men. 
We had a hot time. The excitement began when some 



26 John and Eose 

one presented for discussion the question, Shall bache- 
lors be taxed for the benefit of children? I will cut out 
most of the discussion, giving you the final decision, 
which was incorporated in a resolution, that all bache- 
lors, twenty-five years and over, shall pay a tax of $25 at 
the end of the first year, and that for each year thereafter 
the tax shall progressively increase $5 each year. For 
instance, $25 the first year, $30 the second year, $35 the 
third year, etc., so that at the bachelor's fiftieth year the 
tax will be $150. At this time it will stop. At that age 
they will have a good exemption excuse, by pleading that 
they caimot get any woman to marry them. This resolu- 
tion went through with a rush. 

"The first little ripple appeared on the surface when 
one of the married ladies thought that they could double 
the children's maintenance fund by taxing old maids at 
the same rate, especially as the suffragist contention is, 
that men and women shall have equal rights, equal du- 
ties, equal opportunities. At this some women took ex- 
ception, alleging that there is no equality, because a 
bachelor could ask a lady to marry him and if at first 
he did not succeed, he could try and try again; but on 
the contrary a woman is inhibited from doing this. 

' ' The point was ruled well taken, but it was overcome 
by an amendment — that hereafter old maids should 
have the same right, to ask or conjure a man to marry 
her — which is now exclusively the man's right. Al- 
though some votes were cast against the amendment, it 
passed by a large majority. 

"Then the tug of war began when a mother blessed 
with a lot of children launched the question, Why not 
tax all married couples who have no children on some 



Ten Objections to Woman Suffrage 27 

such basis ? As this would hit over one-half the women 
present, it stirred up a hornet's nest. The poor, dear 
mother was attacked by a veritable swarm of bees. One 
suffragist said woman has not the power of the Creator ; 
she is not to blame. They would be only too glad to be 
blessed by children. But an avalanche of objections was 
launched — too many to specify here. It was here that 
I got in line of battle because I had only recently been 
married and because I was as yet unaware if I should be 
blessed with children. This tax might strike us and if 
it did it might disarrange our financial plan and wipe 
out our savings fund. 

"I gave them a piece of my mind, and as the dear 
mother's motion was not sure of a majority, a vote was 
not risked. The meeting became so disorderly that the 
chairman could not control it. She announced that the 
subject was postponed until another meeting and an ad- 
journment was declared. But even after we were on the 
street the discussion went on in louder tones, which drew 
the police toward us to make inquiries, what the fuss was 
about. Not knomng what might happen, you may be- 
lieve that I went home in a hurry. 

' ' Now let me give you a picture of the woman suffrage 
club. The two hundred members are dominated abso- 
lutely by about a half-dozen of the older ladies, rich in 
dollars and gab, with an abundance of time, who expect 
all the others to mutely listen and applaud thieir 
superior intellects. Just mark the degrading tactics this 
domineering force resorts to. To lure me back they ap- 
pointed themselves a committee to see whether they could 
not prevail on me to attend again. They flattered my 
extraordinary abilities and made it appear that the club 



28 John and Rose 

could not exist without me ; that we must sacrifice our- 
selves for the public need ; and when I finally consented 
and did attend and tried to show my abilities of which 
they flattered me I was so richly possessed, then they ob- 
jected to my displaying them. This got onto my nerves, 
and I poured my wrath on them till I had them drowned. 
This club is ruled by half a dozen tyrants who have 
little respect for their sister members. Like Bismarck, 
they will not tolerate contradiction, not even reasonable 
opposition. 

' ' They are an arrogant, domineering, selfish lot. I am 
through with them, and as they told me their club could 
not exist without me, I will let it die — yes, die, and after 
its death I will not even attend its funeral. 

To which affirmation John added a solemn, "Amen." 

This was just as John had expected. It was exactly like 
"Teddy" of recent fame, who fiattered the people to 
attend his meetings by telling them that they possessed 
the intellectual power to rule. The people must rule. 
The people shall rule, was his slogan. Yet he must rule 
the people, and when these people elected some one else 
to rule them, this, he thought, was out of order, and he 
felt called upon to kill his party, and just how many 
more he will kill the future must disclose. 

It's the same old story, that aU people wish to rule. 
The women and the men are alike in this regard. 

Now that the bogey of woman suffrage, like John 
Brown's body, is mouldering in the grave, let us hope 
that it will stay there, and that its soul will not come 
marching in their household again. 



CHAPTER IV. 

Five Years' Family Bookkeeping. Single and Double Entry 

FAMILY matters were working in their normal state 
again, and as they were approaching the end of 
their first year's wedded life, their thoughts were mostly 
centered on the financial end of it. John had all the 
checks he had drawn on the savings bank returned, also 
the deposit slips, and had his bank book balanced. All 
is specified in the checks except his $5 monthly pocket 
cash, which he could account for, if he felt so disposed, 
or treat it as petty expenses. 

This bank book he treated as his day-book, from which 
he journalized direct. But instead of journalizing all 
the separate checks and deposit slips on the different 
dates as they appeared in his bank book, he assembled 
these checks and slips into as many groups as he wanted 
accounts for, adding each group together and charging 
the respective accounts with them, and crediting the 
bank the totals. (A copy of the Bank Book is shown on 
the following page.) 

In the bank book there were twelve checks for Rose's 
allowance of $50 each, belonging to one and the same 
account, these together making $600. This is charged to 
loss and gain account as family expense. Then there 
were twelve checks of $5 each, for John's cash, a total of 
$60. This with other checks we-re charged to loss and 
gain as family expense, in all $710, and the other checks 
29 



30 



John and Rose 



SAVINGS BANK 

In Account with John — 
End of 1st Year. 



Dr. 

1867 Beginning 1st Year 



Mar. 


1 Bal Due $300.00 


Mar. 


1 Dep. Sal. IMo. 75.00 


Apr. 


1 " " " 75.00 


May 


1 " " " 75.00 


June 


1 " " " 75.00 


July 


1 " " " 75.00 


Aug. 


1 " " " 75.00 


Sept. 


1 " " " 75.00 


Oct. 


1 " " " 75.00 


Nov. 


1 " " " 75.00 


Dec. 


1 " " " 75.00 


1868 




Jan. 


1 " " " 75.00 


Feb. 


1 " " " 75.00 


Feb. 


10 Int. 20.00 



1867 
Mar. 1 
Mar. 2 
Mar. 3 
Apr. 1 
Apr. 2 
Apr. 13 
May 1 
May 2 
May 20 
June 1 
June 2 
July 1 
Julyl 
Aug. 1 
Aug. 3 
Aug. 10 
Sept. 1 
Sept. 2 
Oct. 3 
Oct. 4 
Nov. 2 
Nov. 5 
Nov. 5 

Nov. 6 
Dec. 1 
Dec. 1 
1868 
Jan. 2 
Jan. 2 
Feb. 3 
Feb. 3 



Cr. 

Check, Rose.... $50. 00 
Check, John, cash 5 . 00 

Furniture 150.00 

Check, Rose 50.00 

Check, John, cash 5 . 00 
N.W. Life Ins... 35.00 
Check, Rose.... 50.00 
Check, John, cash 5 . 00 
Check, John, suit 25.00 
Check, Rose.... 50.00 
Check, John, cash 5 . 00 

Check, Rose 50.00 

Check, John, cash 5 . 00 
Check, Rose.... 50.00 
Check, John, cash 5 . 00 
Check, Dr. BiU. 10.00 
Check, Rose.... 50.00 
Check, John, cash 5 . 00 
Check, Rose.... 50.00 
Check, John, cash 5 . 00 
Check, Rose.... 50.00 
Check, John, cash 5 . 00 
Check, Travel 

Exp 12.00 

Check, Books . . 3.00 
Check, Rose.... 50.00 
Check, John, cash 5 . 00 

Check, Rose.... 50.00 
Check, John, cash 5 . 00 
Check, Rose.... 50.00 
Check, John, cash 5 . 00 



$895.00 
Bal. Down 325.00 



$1,220.00 



$1,220.00 



Balance End of 1st Year $325 . 00 



Five Years' Family Bookkeeping 



31 



were charged to the different accounts he kept and all 
credited to the Savings Bank. 

He also found twelve deposit slips of $75 each, a total 
of $900, and one slip for $20 interest. This the bank is 
charged with, and the amount credited to loss and gain 
account. After having grouped and added the items 
into the several accounts he proceeded to journalize in a 
journal-ruled book, about 8x12 inches, of 120 pages, 
which will last a lifetime. To simplify matters, sixty 
pages in the front of the book were reserved for a jour- 
nal and the balance for a ledger : 

This is how he journalized : 



Journal Page 1 . 
End of 1st year. 

Sds-Dr. Savings Bank 


I 


To 
edger 
Page 

62 


Dr. 
$710.00 

150.00 
35.00 


Cr. 

$895.00 


Rose's Allowance 

John's Cash 

John's Suit 

Doctor Bill 


..$600.00 
... 60.00 
... 25.00 
. .. 10.00 




Traveling 


. .. 12.00 
. .. 3.00 










Loss and Gaia, Family Expense 

Furniture Acct . . . 


64 
65 
66 

62 
64 
64 




N. W. Life Ins., Premium . 




' 


Savings Bank Dr., Sds. . . . 

Loss and Gain Salary 

Loss and Gain Interest .... 


920.00 


900.00 
20.00 



John's ledger accounts as they appeared at the begin- 
ning of the year : — 



32 John and Eose 

Page 61 

Dr. Cr. 

Beginning 1st year. . Investments $700. 00 

Page 62 

Beginning 1st year. .Savings Bank 300.00 

Page 63 
Beginning 1st year . .John's Capital $1,000.00 

Besides the ledger accounts above shown, there were 
opened a furniture account, N. "W. Life Ins. account, and 
loss and gain account as they appear in the journal. In 
the journal the ledger page posted to is stated, and in the 
ledger the page in the journal posted from. 

In order to close the year's transactions, he balanced 
the loss and gain account, which he found had a $210 
credit balance, the gain for the year. This he trans- 
ferred or credited his capital with, and debited loss and 
gain, which balanced the loss and gain account for the 
year. To prove the correctness of his account he struck 
his trial balance. 

LOSS AND GAIN 

End of first year ^ 

Dr. Cr. 

Salary $900.00 

Interest 20.00 

Family Expenses $710.00 

Balance Gain to John's Capital 210 . 00 



$920.00 $920.00 



TRIAL BALANCE END OF FIRST YEAR 
Resources ^|f^f Liabilities ^|f|f 

Investment 6i $700.00 John's Capital 

Savings Bank. . . 62 325.00 beg. 1st year. . 63 $1,000.00 

Furniture 65 150.00 John's Gain, end 

N. W. Life 66 35.00 1st Year 63 210.00 



$1,210.00 John's Capital $1,210.00 

The following are the Ledger accounts after being bal- 
anced end of 1st year : 



Five Years' Family Bookkeeping 33 

LEDGER 





From 

Page 

Journal 


Dr. 


Cr. 


Page 61 
Investment Accoxmt 
Beginning 1st year .... Sundries 




$700.00 


.00 


Page 62 
Savings Bank 

Beginning 1st year — Balance 

End of 1st year Salary and In- 
terest 

Sundries 

Balance down . . 


1 
1 


$300.00 
920.00 


$895.00 
325.00 




$1,220.00 


$1,220.00 


Balance down.. 


$325.00 




Page 63 
John's Capital 

Beginning 1st year Balance 

End of 1st year Loss and Gain. 


1 




$1,000.00 
210.00 


Balance 


$1,210.00 


Page 64 
Loss and Gain 

End of 1st year Bank Family Exp. 

Bank Sal. and Int. 

Transferred to John's 

Capital 


1 
1 


$710.00 
210.00 


$920.00 








$920.00 


$920.00 


Page 65 
Furniture 
End of 1st year Svmdries 


1 


$150.00 




Page 66 
N. W. Life Ins. 
End of 1st year Premimn Pd. 


1 


$35.00 





34 John and Eose 

Rose proceeded to balance her account in the same 
manner that John had done except in single entry. She 
got her bank book balanced and her checks and slips re- 
turned, and found a balance of $306 due her. This was 
$106 more than at the beginning of the^ year. All she 
drew out of the bank was for household expenses. It 
showed her savings for the year, but not the total ex- 
pense for each department. This she determined by 
grouping the check slips and the bills she had preserved 
of her cash purchases, into such various departments as 
she wished to know the expenses of. 

After she had assorted and added together the differ- 
ent groups she posted them in her book, which was an 
ordinary day-book, by which she had a clear exposition 
of her stewardship. Following was her first year's ac- 
count: 

ROSE'S HOUSEHOLD EXPENSES AND INCOME 
End of first year 

Expenditures Dr. Cr. 

12 Mos. Rent at $10per month $120.00 

Fuel 28.00 

Light, Gas and Water 42.00 

Groceries and Provisions 260 . 00 

Wearing Apparel 36 . 00 

Sundry Small Expenses 14. 00 

$500.00 

Received Allowance $50 a month $600 . 00 

Received Interest — Savings Bank. 6.00 

Balance Saved first year 106.00 

$606.00 $606.00 

Savings Down 106.00 

Had in Bank beginning first year 200 . 00 

Now in the Savings Bank end of first year $306.00 



Five Years' Family Bookkeeping 35 

On entering the second year John increased his in- 
vestments by taking from the savings bank a $200 three- 
per-cent certificate of deposit, and he had taken in the 
N. Y. Life Insurance Company a $2,000 twenty-year 
endowment policy, for which he paid $70 annual pre- 
mium. For this he opened the only new account for the 
year. After he had his bank account balanced at the 
end of the second year he proceeded to journalize from 
this as he did at the end of the first year, as follows : 

JOURNAL 

End of second year 

Ledger 
Page Dr. Cb. 

Sds Dr Savings Bank 62 $1,040.00 

Rose's Allowance $600.00 .. 

John, Cash 60.00 

John, Clothing 35.00 

Books, Papers 30.00 

Loss and Gain, Family Exp 64 $725 . 00 

Furniture, Chair 65 10.00 

N. W. Life Ins. Premium 66 35.00 

N. Y. Life Ins. Premium 67 70.00 

Investment $200 C. of Dep 61 200.00 

Savings Bank Dr. Sds 62 $926.00 

Loss and Gain, Salary 64 900.00 

Loss and Gain, Interest 64 26.00 

John had posted the above in the ledger, as the year 

before, which is not exhibited here, only the loss and gain 

and the trial balance being given, as follows : 

LOSS AND GAIN 
End of second year -pj ^ 

Salary $900.00 

Interest 26.00 

Family Expense $725.00 

Bal. Gain to John's Capital 201.00 



$926.00 $926.00 



36 John and Rose 

TRIAL BALANCE 
End of second year 
Assets ^^H' Liabilities ^iJ^f 

Savings Bank. . . 62 $211.00 John Capital end 

Investments 61 900.00 of 1st year . . . . 63 $1,210.00 

Furniture 65 160.00 John Capital Gain 

N. W. Life 66 70.00 end of 2nd 

N. Y. Life 67 70.00 year 63 201.00 

$1,411 . 00 John's Capital $1,411 . 00 

Rose in the second year had to pay $2 a month more 
rent and saved only $74. The following is her state- 
ment: 

ROSE'S EXPENDITURES AND INCOME 

Dr. Cr. 

Rent 12 months $144.00 

Fuel 31.00 

Light 26.00 

Gas 14.00 

Water 5.00 

Groceries, etc 262.00 

Wearing Apparel 45 . 00 

Sundry Expense 8.00 



Total $535.00 

Received Allowance $600.00 

Received Interest 9 . 00 

Balance Saved 74.00 



$609.00 $609.00 



Savings Down $74.00 

Had in Bank end first year , 306.00 



Balance end of second year $380 . 00 

The third year was the most interesting in their lives, 
by reason of the arrival of their firstborn, a son, whom 
they named Adam, Though this was an increased tax 
on their finances, they were glad to bear it, and as a con- 
sequence Rose got an extra $60 a year allowance, while 
John got a $100 raise in his salary. 



Five Years' Family Bookkeeping 37 

Rose kept an extra account of little Adam's expense, 
in order to determine how near it was to her extra al- 
lowance, and to the sum which was set by the women at 
the woman's suffrage meeting when they agreed that 
the government should compensate parents for their 
children's maintenance, which she still hoped might be 
realized. 

The formation of a stock company by the addition of 
a new partner, which John once suggested as the safest 
plan, was for the present abandoned, because little 
Adam seemed the image of themselves, with such frank, 
honest features that they felt assured he would never 
endanger the safety of their financial obligations. 

At the end of the third year the journal account is 
not exhibited, only the loss and gain and trial balance 
account : 

LOSS AND GAIN ACCOUNT 
End of third year 
Db. Ce. 

Family Exp... $778.00 Salary $1,000.00 

Bal. Gain to John's 

capital 254.00 Interest 32.00 

$1,032.00 $1,032.00 

TRIAL BALANCE 

End of third year 
Assets ^|f|f De. Liability ^ffff Ce. 

Savings Bank .. . 62 $345.00 John's Capital, 

Investment 61 900 . 00 end second 

Furniture 65 175.00 year 63 $1,411.00 

N. W. Life Ins. . 66 105.00 John's Capital 
N. Y. Life Ins. . . 67 140.00 Gala end third 

year 63 254.00 

$1,665.00 John's Capital $1,665.00 

Rose in the third year had saved only $49, which, 
added to her last year's bank credit, brought it up to 



38 John and Rose 

$429. This was discouraging, because she had had her 
allowance raised $60 for the year, and yet her savings 
had decreased. Of course she had to ask for another raise 
of $60 a year, which was granted, while John got his sal- 
ary raised another $100, which brought it up to $1,100 a 
year. 

At the end of the fourth year is shown John's loss and 
gain account and his trial balance, and Rose's net gain, 
as follows: 

LOSS AND GAIN 
End of fourth year 

De. Ce. 

Salary $1,100 and Int. $38 $1,138.00 

Family Expense $850.00 

Bal. Gain to John's Capital 288.00 

$1,138.00 $1,138.00 



TRIAL BALANCE 

End of fourth year 
Assets ^|fff De. Liabilities ^^fff Ce. 

Savings Bank .. . 62 $528.00 John's Capital, 

Investments 61 900.00 end third year 63 $1,665.00 

Furniture 65 175 . 00 

N. W. Life Ins . . 66 140.00 John's Capital 

N.Y. Life Ins... 67 210.00 Gain 63 288.00 



$1,953 . 00 John's Capital $1,953 . 00 

Rose, at the end of the fourth year, out of her $720 
allowance and $12 interest had saved and added to her 
bank account $112, and then had in the bank $541. 

In the fifth year John added a $300 bond bearing four 
per cent to his investment fund, which fund would now 
have been $1,200 instead of $1,000, but for the loss of his 
mining stock, which had never paid a cent of dividend 
and which someone told him was worthless. With a 
curse at the agent who enticed him to buy it by the 



Five Years' Family Bookkeeping 39 

assurance that it would pay an annual 20 per cent divi- 
dend he reluctantly charged it to loss and gain, the first 
loss he had sustained. But, who knows? It may serve 
as a lesson in the future. 

At the end of the fifth year John and Rose were 
blessed by the birth of a daughter, whom they named 
Eva. Because Rose thought a girl was worth more than 
a boy she felt she ought to get a larger allowance than 
for Adam, which was $5 a month. As John didn't know 
how many more children might come, he figured out to 
her that he could hardly afford it. He said, however, 
that he would try to get a raise in his salary. But first 
he would determine how his finances stood at the end of 
the year, which he found as follows : 

LOSS AND GAIN ACCOUNT 

End of fifth year 

Dr. Cr. 

FamUy Expense $846 . 00 Salary one year $1,100 . 00 

Invest. Min. Stock 

Lost 200.00 Interest 42.00 

To John's Capital 

Gain fifth year 96.00 

$1,142.00 $1,142.00 

TRIAL BALANCE 
End of fifth year 
Assets %'' Db- Liabilities ifdger ^r. 

Savings Bank .. . 62 $419.00 John's Capital 

Investments 6l 1,000.00 fourth year... . 63 $1,953.00 

Furniture 65 175.00 John's Capital 

N.W. Life Ins. . 66 175.00 Gain fifth year 63 96.00 

N. Y. Life 67 280.00 

$2,049 . 00 John's Capital. . . $2,049 . 00 
Rose, during the fifth year, had an allowance of $720 
and $18 interest, out of which she saved and added to 
her bank deposit $111, the bank owing her now $652. 



CHAPTER V. 



Trustee Company Invests John's $1,000 and Rose's $500 at Four Per Cent 
Compound Interest. Table Showing Accumulation 

THEY had been blessed with a fortunate five years 
of married life. John's capital had increased in 
that time from $1,000 to $2,049, in spite of a loss of $200 
on his mining stock. Rose's capital had increased from 
$200 to $652. 

We will now assume that they continue to old age to 
save as they had done, and that John has learned by his 
disastrous experience to keep away from the alluring 
agent 's get-rich-quick investments. In that case, .if John 
invested $1,000 and added to this $200 a year and Rose 
invested $500 from her savings at four per cent, and 
added to this $100 a year at compound interest, then the 
following table will show the net worth of each at the end 
of each five years : 



INVESTMENT TABLE 



End of 5 years 35 2, 

End of 10 years 40 3, 

End of 15 years 45 5, 

End of 20 years 50 8, 

End of 25 years 55 10, 

End of 30 years 60 14, 

End of 35 years 65 IS! 

End of 40 years 70 23! 

End of 45 years 75 30, 

End of 50 years 80 37, 

End of 55 years 85 46, 

End of 60 years 90 58! 

End of 65 years 95 7l! 

End of 70 years 100 88, 

End of 75 years 105 108, 

End of 80 years 110 133, 



Age yrs. 

000.00 Rose's investment 25 

299.90 End of 5 years ''" 

881.44 End of 10 years 

805.60 End of 15 years 

146.64 End of 20 years 

995.00 End of 25 years 

460.50 End of 30 years 

676.70 End of 35 years 

806.32 End of 40 years 

047.30 End of 45 years 

640.40 End of 50 years 

878.60 End of 55 years 

118.20 End of 60 years 

792.96 End of 65 years ^^ 

430.40 End of 70 years 95 

672.36 End of 75 years 100 

299.80 End of 80 years 105 
40 



30 
35 
40 
45 
50 
55 
60 
65 
70 
75 
80 
85 
90 
95 



$ 500.00 

1,149.95 

1,940.72 

2,902.80 

4,073.32 

5,497.50 

7,230.25 

9,338.35 

11,903.16 

15,023.15 

18,820.20 

23,439.30 

29,059.10 

35,896.48 

44,215.20 

54,336.18 

66,649.90 



The Investment 41 

It will be noticed that Rose's $500 investment and 
$100 yearly additions are just one-half of John's, so her 
accumulation is one-half of his, as per table. If it were 
one-fourth of John's, that is, $250 investment and $50 
yearly added, then her accumulation would be one- 
fourth of John's or one-half of her table, as above. 

The investment so appealed to them that they con- 
cluded to enter into it, and as the Trustee Company 
makes it a specialty to safely invest for others on long 
time — collects the interest and reinvests it — John turned 
over his $1,000 investment to it, and Rose gave from her 
savings $500 to invest for her. 

Rose's savings for the last five years were $452, lack- 
ing about $10 of $100 a year, as above provided, but this 
little discrepancy John will gladly add to her allowance. 

After John's $1,000 permanent investment and Rose's 
$500, John will have $419 and Rose $152 left in the sav- 
ings bank as working capital. 

We will not follow John's and Rose's bookkeeping 
any further, assuming that they continue to keep them 
as before, and that John added annually $200 and Rose 
$100 to their investment funds. 

By the table above, they can determine the value of 
their investment at the end of any five-year period. 



CHAPTER VI. 

John as Supercargo and Cook on the Schooner Traveler 

JOHN had been sent by his firm as a supercargo on 
the little schooner ''Traveller" to sell her cargo of 
250,000 shingles in the Chicago market. For economy's 
sake he went and returned on the schooner. The crew 
consisted of Capt. Easson, one mate, two before the mast, 
and a nigger cook. After John's return he told Rose 
about his adventure thus: 

"When the ship was ready and the wind was fair the 
little schooner set sail and proceeded out of the river on 
its course to Chicago. 

"After we were fairly under way with a moderate fa- 
vorable breeze I went into the cabin and was thunder- 
struck when the little nigger cook addressed me in broad 
low Dutch. 

"I looked behind and around him, expecting to see a 
sturdy Mecklenburger addressing me, and it took me 
quite a time to recover from my shock, and be convinced 
that a nigger could be taken for a Dutchman if out of 
sight. 

"After some more talk with him, he told me he had 
sailed on a Hamburg ship and there acquired the Dutch 
language. 

"He was also quite a scholar, could read and write 
quite fluently. 

"We had fair wind all the way and after 24 hours 
reached Chicago. 

42 




Schooner Traveler 



John as Supercargo and Cook 43 

"Now came my hardest task, to sell my cargo of shin- 
gles inside of 24 hours, because any additional time was 
subject to demurrage, and to get a good price and the 
cash. 

"The year was one of the hard-time years, and most 
sales were made on time. 

' ' I sold the cargo all right, but got notes running from 
thirty to ninety days. These notes I discounted at the 
rate of two per cent interest a month after being com- 
pelled to put my name on the back of each. When all 
this was done and the money in my pocket, I felt at ease ; 
had I known at that time that my indorsement would 
hold me responsible to pay back the money with interest, 
in case the notes were not paid when due, I would not 
have felt so happy. 

"Here ignorance was bliss. 

"After the cargo had been discharged and the back 
freight taken in, the little 'Traveller' was hauled by line 
to the end of the harbor piers ready for the return trip. 

"It was now about 4 o'clock in the afternoon; all 
sails were set and the breeze freshening from the south 
with a fair wind. 

"The 'Traveller' surged and pulled on her lines by 
the increasing wind, as if shC' was anxious to be going. 
The captain walked back and forth on the pier impa- 
tiently awaiting the arrival of our nigger cook, who was 
somewhere in the city. 

"The more the wind freshened the more the captain's 
temper rose. I was getting influenced by his impatience, 
and said: 'This is too bad, losing all this nice breeze; let 
us go; I will cook!' Without waiting for a confir- 
mation of my offer the captain said, 'AH right, cast off 



44 John and Rose 

the lines ! ' It was now five o 'clock, the wind was an ideal 
south wester with but little sea, and the 'Traveller' slid 
along at a beautiful gait towards home. 

''Now my new responsibilities dawned on me. In an 
hour I must have supper ready. Asking the captain 
about the bill of fare, he says, 'Well, we must have bread, 
butter, coffee, some cheese, crackers, and two eggs, 
for each.' I looked over the pantry, and was glad to 
find quite a stock of bread, plenty of crackers, etc. I 
felt confident that I could master the whole bill of fare 
except baking a good loaf of bread, of which I had my 
doubt, so the baked bread looked sweeter to me than 
any other time. Now I got the fire going to boil the eggs 
and coffee. I heard that it takes three minutes to boil 
eggs and that coffee must be put in the kettle when the 
kettle begins to sing and blow steam. 

"While I was grinding the coffee Ed. Smith came into 
the cabin with the intention to assist me. 

"Ed. was a general utility man, full of wit and good 
humor. He says: 'Well, John, I suppose I must give 
you a lift !' 'Now, Ed., look here. I am chief cook here 
npw, and I'd rather be chief cook and bottle washer than 
only a bottle washer, even if it takes all my wit to do it. 
You go to your forecastle, and when supper is ready I 
will let you know.' 

"He reluctantly vacated, I suppose for the reason he 
feared he would have to eat a green supper prepared 
by a green hand. 

"Half past six the welcome call 'Supper ready' was 
heard on deck. 

' ' I was favored by a crew with good appetites, and so 
the meal was so much more appreciated. After the table 



John as Supercargo and Cook 45 

was cleared, dishes washed and all stowed away in its 
place, I lit my cigar and asked the captain when alone 
how he liked the supper. 'Why, ' he says, 'first rate ; you 
must have cooked before.' 'Yes, I have, but different 
kind.' The same time I asked what was wanted for 
breakfast. ' Oh, well, the same as supper, only add beef- 
steak and potatoes. ' 

' ' Ah ! now comes the test. I had heard that to make 
tender steak requires a roaring fire, and that potatoes 
must be poked into with a fork from time to time, and 
thereby judge the condition. 

' ' It was now getting dark. The wind being off shore 
the 'Traveller' hugged it close so that we could hear 
the cow bells, the voices of people from shore, lights 
appearing and disappearing. Waukegan light came to 
view, and by taking this all in homeward bound, I felt 
as happy as a king in spite of performing the duties of 
a nigger cook. 

' ' I early sought my bunk, because I thought it would 
be best to get up early, especially as I was not certain 
whether I had not to make several attempts to get my 
beefsteak and potatoes just right. 

"These new responsibilities seemed to have weighed 
quite heavy on my mind, because I had had no sound 
sleep and dreamed beefsteak and potatoes through the 
night. 

"At break of day I was up and doing, and before 
seven o'clock breakfast was ready. How much relief 
was it to me that all the mysteries of cooking had been 
so successfully mastered. 

"The 'Traveller' was now between Milwaukee and 
Port Washington. The wind held out about the same, 



46 John and Eose 

and I calculated that we had good prospect to reach 
home before supper, so had only one more meal to pre- 
pare. 

"The bill of fare for dinner, the captain told me, 
should be the same except cornbeef and cabbage instead 
of steak; but because this would be another experiment 
with me I persuaded him that because the beefsteak 
might spoil, while cornbeef would be everlasting, it would 
be better economy to use up the fresh beef left, to which 
he acquiesced. So we had our breakfast over again. 
When dinner came around we were abreast Sheboygan, 
the wind still favorable. At three o 'clock Manitowoc was 
in sight, and when the 'Traveller' was heading for the 
south pier, where she intended to land this time, we were 
surprised to see our lost nigger cook standing on the 
end of the pier to bid us welcome. As soon as he had dis- 
covered our departure, he took the steamer and arrived 
about an hour before we did." 

This adventure resulted in John's criticism on cook- 
ing being more respected thereafter. 



T 



CHAPTER VII. 

TheylPlan How to Acquire Their Own Home 

HE years rolled along, and in the course of human 
events two more boys were born to them, whom 
they named Henry and George. At this time one was 
three years old and the other one. John philosophized 
on the wonderful laws of nature. While the Almighty 
had blessed them with a couple of children, the image of 
themselves, he, as a good general, was careful to safe- 
guard the human race by creating a reserve. 

Rose had her hands full and discovered that she, and 
all those in her condition, had no time for politics. She 
could not exercise the franchise if she had it, and there- 
fore if women voted, the voting would have to be done 
by the idle rich or the' single women who had time. . Con- 
sequently that class would completely rule her and those 
in her class who were the most deserving. 

This was humiliating to Rose, and she was inclined 
to look upon John's ten commandments as real gospel. 
Her little home had not grown apace with her little 
family, and she speculated on a larger home. She 
planned a new one, which to her was very fascinat- 
ing. From youth onward all of us are more or less 
overjoyed by contemplating the building of our own 
castles. Especially is this so with those who are married, 
who dwell longingly on this acquisition. 

Aside from this Rose had an ulterior motive, because 
she thought by the ownership of their own home, she 
47 



48 John and Eose 

would escape the payment of the vexatious monthly re- 
curring rent. 

One day she reminded John that their house was get- 
ting too small; that she had a beautiful plan in her 
mind for a new one. John had had the same thought 
in his mind for some time, but he refrained from dis- 
closing it to Rose, for he feared it might arouse her 
pent-up enthusiasm and she would overwhelm him with 
her eloquence, so that he might really consent to build. 

The expense was the only barrier to its execution. 
John told her that, but she argued that to pay rent was 
certainly more expensive than to own their own home. 

' ' Yes, ' ' John retorted, ' ' it would be less expensive to 
you, if you expect to be relieved from paying rent, by 
my furnishing you the house rent free. But this would 
be in violation of the stipulation of our agreement, by 
which I purposely arranged that you must pay house 
rent, and for which I provided in your allowance. Other- 
wise the allowance would have been correspondingly less. 
The main object I had in view was to get you financially 
interested in the whole household expense. I knew if 
you had no interest in this part of the household expense 
you would pester me every little while for a larger or 
more expensive house, while, contrariwise, if you had 
to pay the higher rent you would not be so liable to ask 
for it. 

"I know that in most cases where a wife gets an 
allowance, it is made to cover only a certain part of the 
household expense, which will only interest the wife in 
that particular part. But that does not give her an in- 
centive to general economy ; it is not effective and causes 
unpleasant friction," 



Plan to Acquire a Home 49 

He acquainted her with the figures which had revolved 
in his mind, time and time again, because lie, too, was 
possessed of the general desire to own his own home. 
He said, " If we should build our own home a little larger 
than the one we occupy now, it would cost us at least 
$3,000 and the lot $1,000 ; in all $4,000. 

"To furnish the capital for this I would have to sell 
$2,000 of my four per cent investments, and you must 
sell of your investments $1,000, which would then leave 
my investments a balance of about $300, and yours about 
$150. Besides this we would owe on the house $1,000, 
on which we must pay five per cent interest. 

"We will now compare the rent of the proposed new 
house over the old. 

Assuming I loan the house $2,000 at 4% $ 80.00 

Assuming you loan the house $1,000 at 4% 40.00 

Assuming we borrow $1,000 at 5% 50.00 

Total interest $170.00 

Taxes and insurance 50.00 

Repairs 20.00 

Depreciation as a rule is 5%, but we will make 

it 2% 60.00 

Total rent . ., $300.00 

against which you pay $144. This would be more than 
double you pay now. 

" If I should charge you $300 rent, you could not save 
a penny ; and if I should agree to pay one-half the rent 
and you the other I could not keep up my savings as 
formerly. Another drawback: I do not believe I shall 



50 John and Rose 

live in this place all my life, and in case I should want 
to sell I would have to do it at a great loss. Few houses 
sell at what they cost. The owner of a new house which 
he has built must stand a loss when he sells, relieving the 
buyer of it. For these reasons I have concluded that 
it would be far more advantageous to buy instead of 
building a new house, especially with the means at our 
eommand. ' ' 

These revelations gave Rose new food for thought, 
which she proceeded to masticate very slowly, thereby 
inducing good digestion.. 

It was, of course, a hard task to tear herself loose 
from her beautifully laid-olit house plan, but she con- 
soled herself by the proverb : 

"The test laid plans of mice and men 
Gang aft agley." 

The more she reflected on John's hypothesis on the 
house question the more she was drawn to his conclu- 
sions. 

"Yes, he is right. Even in case we should not move 
away from here, as he saj^s we may, and should buy at 
first, one already built, which we can sell with but little 
loss, if any, we can, at any time, build a new one after 
we have saved a little more." 

She was now entirely in harmony with John's house- 
purchasing idea. John in the meantime had watched 
the different houses offered for sale, and at last found 
one which he thought suitable. It contained two more 
rooms than their rented house, and it stood upon a large 
lot, of sufficient size for a garden. 



Plan to Acquire a Home 51 

The owner had built it only five years before at a cost 
of $2,800. The lot cost $1,100; total cost, $3,900. He 
had only lived in it two years. After that he had moved 
west. When the house was rented it had brought $18 
a month, but at times it was empty. It only netted the 
owner on an average two per cent on his investment. It 
had then been in the market for several years. The 
owner at first could not make up his mind to seU at a 
loss, and at his price no one wanted to buy. 

So from year to year he lowered his price, until finally 
he was willing to part with the house for $2,500. He 
would make a good bargain at that, because money out 
west would bring him six per cent, which on $2,500 
would be $150, or about three times the net rental on his 
house. 

After these discoveries John and Rose made an in- 
spection tour. She was pleased with the location, ground 
and garden, but reminded John that the house was 
yearning for a coat of paint outside. "Yes," replied 
John, ' ' and I must bear the expense of it, too. ' ' 

When they were inside the house Rose found the rooms 
of ample size and sufficient in number. Everything was 
lovely. John reminded her that some walls were crying 
for paper, which was inside repair, and for which she 
would have to pay. Of course she would. They agreed 
that the price of the house was low and that they could 
sell it again any time, and build a new one, if they felt 
so inclined, and can better afford it. 



CHAPTER VIII. 

They Buy a Home and Move Into It. How They Financed It 

ROSE was so pleased with the house that she urged 
John to close the bargain as soon as possible. But 
she could not see how to finance the deal, although it 
was far more favorable than if they had to build a new 
home. 

John was in love with stock companies. They are 
convenient. They act as a safeguard, the same as an 
anchor to windward, and can make a big show by either 
wind or water. He had planned the house financing 
many a time and was prepared to present it ready made. 
"The first thing we will have to do," he said, "is to 
raise the $2,500. This we can do by going to the Trustee 
Company, which bought for us the four per cent bonds 
and promised to buy them back again when we wanted 
the money for them for a one per cent commission. 

"I will sell," said John, "of my investment funds 
$1,500, and you must sell of your bonds $1,000 ; this, you 
see, will pay for our house. ' ' 

"Yes, I see," said Rose, "but this will bankrupt our 
investment funds." 

"Yes," John answered, "but only for a few hours, at 
which time we will have the investment funds recouped. 
I will show you how. We will immediately form a 
Home Stock Company and hold our first meeting. Be- 
cause I hold the majority of stock I will elect you sec- 
retary and treasurer, and you will elect me president. 
52 



They Buy a Home 53 

After this is done we will authorize the officers to issue 
twenty-five shares, each of $100, a total of $2,500, of stock 
of which $1,500 will be issued in my name, and $1,000 in 
your name." 

Eose replied, "What do you want with the stock? It 
will be as worthless as your mining stock which you 
threw away." 

"With this difference," said John, "it will cost us 
nothing. 

"Yet it might have value if we should practice the 
deception of the promoter, and foist the stock on some- 
one else; but of course we would not resort to such 
disreputable practice. This is the way we v/ill recoup 
our investment fund, perhaps to you the most impor- 
tant: The officers of the Home Stock Company at its 
meeting will authorize an issue of $2,500 4% bonds, of 
which I take $1,500, and you $1,000. These, then, will 
replace the bonds we sold to the Trustee Company, and 
restore our investment funds to precisely the same con- 
dition as they were, and you must admit it is as safe. ' ' 

This was a financial puzzle to Rose. "You say," she 
replied, ' ' that this new arrangement will leave our four 
per cent investment funds as before, and that we will 
have $2,500 stock and $2,500 bonds in the Home Stock 
Company, and the $2,500 house besides. If this is not 
a juggle, I don't know what is." 

"Yes, our four per cent investment," said John, "will 
be in no way affected. It will keep on earning four per 
cent interest, night and day and Sundays. ' ' 

"You men," she said, "are certainly frenzied finan- 
ciers. I can't understand such juggling. You may en- 
lighten me on the intricacy of the stock company after- 



54 John and Rose 

wards, but you better go and close the house deal before 
it's too late." 

John proceeded to do as Eose requested and closed 
the bargain. While he was gone Rose was in a mental 
whirl trying to disentangle John's financial proposition, 
so much so that she might have to resort to brandy as 
a steadier. When John arrived home she at once pro- 
pounded to him this question : 

"Who will pay me my four per cent interest on my 
$1,000 Home Stock Company bonds?" 

"The Home Stock Company," said John, "or, rather, 
you will. Please pay attention : You now pay to Mr. A. 
$144 a year rent. Before we move out of here we must 
bargain with the Home Stock Company for the rent 
you must pay for the new house. The house has been 
rented for $18 a month, or $216 a year; but because 
you are intimately interested in the company it no doubt 
will put the rent at $150, out of which the Home Stock 
Company will pay the four per cent interest on its 
$2,500 bonds, which will be $100, leaving $50 for the 
taxes, insurance, and repairs. So you see you will get 
$40 interest on your $1,000 and I $60 on my $1,500 in- 
vestment as before." 

Rose did not yet see. She took her time to unravel the 
tangle. However, they moved into the new house, and 
after they were settled she asked John: "Did you or- 
ganize the Home Stock Company for the purpose of cir- 
cumventing liabilities that you told me about some years 
ago?" 

"No," he replied, "but it might in some cases. Sup- 
pose a cyclone blew our house on top of our neighbor's, 



They Buy a Home 55 

wrecked it, and killed or wounded its inmates. They 
might take the house for the damage done, but the Home 
Stock Company could lose nothing if they took it from 
them, because it was mortgaged for all it 's worth, which 
is a first lien." 

Rose laughed. "Why," she said, "the neighbors can- 
not take the house from the Home Company's lot from 
where it is blown away. They have it already on top 
of their house." 

That startled John for a minute, but he recovered, 
and with apparent ease explained, "But the lot re- 
mains, ' ' 

By this time it flashed into Rose's mind that she had 
a bond on the blown-away house, and in a hysterical 
voice cried out, "Oh, my! The house is gone, wrecked. 
What will my four per cent bond on it be worth now? 
Nothing. ' ' 

That very question had taken possession of John's 
mind, and while pondering on it. he solved it. His 
solution he imparted to Rose by telling her that as a 
matter of fact they would make the Home Company in- 
sure the house against cyclones, so that this danger was 
averted. 

But he also told her another remote danger. Sup- 
pose the chimney blew down, fell on somebody on the 
sidewalk; the damage could not be collected because 
the Home Company had no other asset than the house, 
and that was bonded soul and body. John was glad 
that by this talk she had called up the necessity of in- 
suring the house against cyclones. 

As Rose was now pacified John prepared to go to his 



56 John and Rose 

work ; but before going away he asked Rose what would 
be the next intricate problem with which she would tax 
his ingenuity. As she already had in mind that this 
would be watered stock, sfiie told John to prepare him- 
self to elucidate this subject after his return. 



o 



CHAPTER IX. 

John Explains Stock Companies, and How They are Watered 

N his return Rose asked John, ' ' How about watered 
stock? Is it of the mining stock kind you bought 
and lost all?" 

' ' Yes, something like it. The best way for you to com- 
prehend it will be to take our Home Stock Company for 
an example, of which you and I are the sole sharehold- 
ers, and which we absolutely control. In the olden 
times most stock companies issued shares with no stated 
value in them. Supposing a stock company was formed 
with a capital of $2,500. It could issue all in $1 shares 
or in any multiple thereof not to exceed $2,500. The value 
of each share was valued by the net value of the assets. 
In case these should increase, each share would increase 
in proportion to the increases in value ; but if the assets 
should decrease, the share value would correspondingly 
decrease. The value printed on a share, which has only 
recently been adopted, is only nominal. Its real value 
depends on the net worth behind it. 

"For instance, take the twenty-five shares of the 
Home Stock Company, which has the value of a $2,500 
house behind it. Thus each share is worth $100; but 
after the house is mortgaged or bonded for $2,500, there 
is no real value left, only the controlling power in the 
shares. This might bring the value of the shares up to 
or above par, and again it might leave them valueless, 
57 



58 John and Rose 

owing to the vicissitudes of the company. Therefore 
shares of stock are more or less speculative. 

"Now let me get back to the water. Our $2,500 stock 
in the Home Stock Company, although each share has 
printed on its face $100 a share, because the house, its 
only asset, is bonded at its full value, has undergone its 
first baptism in water, and it may be regarded as wa- 
tered in the first degree, the least possible degree of 
watered stock. But I will show you later on how it can 
be baptized in the second, third, and many more de- 
grees — and show why even watered stock may have 
value. 

"Suppose a promoter like the one who decoyed me (and 
there are many more like me) into buying his worthless 
mining stock controlled our Home Stock Company, and 
suppose our city was booming and everybody had the 
speculative fever. Property and rent would surely raise 
at that stage. The promoter rents the house of the 
Home Stock Company for $20 a month, and he adds 
$10 to this out of his own pocket, so that he can show 
the income to be $30 a month or $360 a year. He knows 
that the property actually cost the builder of the house 
$3,900, but as everything is on the boom he thinks he 
can safely value it at $5,000, and he bonds it at $4,000 
at four per cent interest. The income brings $360, less 
taxes, etc., $60; and four per cent interest on $4,000 
bonds is $160, leaving a net income of $140, which would 
pay three per cent dividend on $4,000 stock and leave 
$20 for depreciation. He thereupon issues $4,000 of stock 
and calculates that he could sell the stock at about half 
its face value, that is, fifty cents on the dollar. This 
would, at that rate, bring the dividend rate to six per 



John Explains Stock Companies 59 

cent on the investment, an attractive rate, and to the 
bond buyer he gives an inducement by offering them at 
about 90 cents, which nets the investor about four and a 
half per cent. On that basis he has printed the following 
circular : 

BEST investment EVER OFFERED. 

"Safe and Profitable. Rome Stock Co. 4-0 Shares of 
Stock, and $4,000 Four Per Cent Bonds, which are Se- 
cured hy a Beautiful and Practical New Residence, 
which is conservatively worth $5,000 and has an income 
of $30 a month or $360 a year, after allowing $60 for 
taxes and insurance and $160 for interest on honds, 
there will he left a net income of $lJfO, paying three per 
cent on the face value of the stock, which I offer at 
one-half, or $50 a share, and at this rate will pay six 
per cent on the investment. 

"With this ammunition he hunts and fires on easy 
marks his wares, and by his persuasive power succeeds 
in selling his bonds all the way from 85 to par, and Ms 
stock from $35 to $50 a share. The average he receives 
from his bonds is 90 cents on a dollar, and for the shares 
$40 each. This bring him: 

For $4,000 bonds, 90c $3,600.00 

For $4,000 stock, 40c 1,600.00 

Total $5,200.00 

His investment for the house was . . . .$2,500.00 
Expenses, advertisements, etc 200.00 $2,700.00 

Clear gain to the promoter $2,500.00 



60 John and Rose 

' ' This is certainly a very clever financial venture, and 
may be termed a double baptism of water. I think 
Rose, this will give you sufficient food for thought for 
some time. After you have it digested I shall give you 
some more." 

Rose became more and more interested in stock com- 
panies, which to her appeared a most prolific field to 
operate in. She wondered why John, so clever, and 
with an acute intellect, did not enter into this field, in- 
stead of wasting his years behind a desk, for a paltry 
$100 a month, when he could earn $2,500 in no time. 
He really had great ability and tact, but there was some- 
thing lacking. "What could it be ? It must be a lack of 
application. Yes, that was it. She would speak to him 
about it when he arrived home. 

After supper, when John was in his easy chair, smok- 
ing his pipe, Rose said, "I was thinking why you did 
not finance the Home Stock Company as the promoter 
did. How easily you could have earned the $2,500 by 
which our house would have cost us nothing. ' ' 

John was prepared for this and replied : 

"First, you would not pay $20 a month rent, nor 
would I be willing to pay $10 a month to inflate the rent 
to $30 a month, or $360 a year, as a promotor might do, 
for which you now pay only $150 a year. 

' ' Second, I have not been educated to misrepresent or 
deceive anybody ; and even if I did possess astute abili- 
ties, and by exercising them could succeed in picking up 
millions of dollars by such dishonorable practices, I 
could not enjoy them. I would feel wretched, and poorer 
than a church mouse." 

This elevated John's character, in the estimation of 



John Explains Stock Companies 61 

Rose, on a pinnacle of high nobility. She then entered 
on the subject of the third or more degree of watered 
stock, which John began to explain. 



EAILROAD STOCK 

"So far we have only dealt with small transactions 
and petty amounts. Now we will change to big railroad 
financiering, as it was done in the early days. Instead 
of a capital of $2,500 we will organize our Home Rail- 
road Company with $25,000,000, nominal capital. As- 
sume that the company is organized and has issued 
250,000 shares, each of $100, the total amount, $25,000,- 
000, on which is collected an assessment of 10 per cent, 
which brings a fund of $2,500,000 cash, with which the 
company proceeds to build the railroad. 

"The officers are authorized to issue $1,000,000, 6 per 
cent interest bearing bonds, not to be sold below 90 cents 
on a dollar, for each $1,000,000 labor and materials ex- 
pended on the road till it is completed. 

"The interest rate may seem too high to you, but in 
those days interest was in some cases double the amount 
paid at the present time. We will assume that the road 
is completed in two years and has actually cost $25,- 
000,000 which was derived from the assessments of 10 
per cent on stock, which brought $2,500,000, and the sale 
of $25,000,000 bonds at 90 brought $22,500,000; total, 
$25,000,000. 

'■ ' The road is now set in operation, and at the end of the 
year shows a net earning of $2,500,000, which, after the 
6 per cent interest on $25,000,000, being $1,500,000, is 
paid, will leave to the stockholders $1,000,000, equal to 



62 John and Eose 

4 per cent dividend on the $25,000,000 stock. But as 
only 10 per cent was paid on the stock, it will be 40 per 
cent profit on their investments. As this would be an ex- 
orbitant dividend rate, and as the company must reserve 
some cash for extension, it decides to declare only 1 per 
cent dividend, which will be a 10 per cent dividend on 
the investment and will require $250,000 and leave a sur- 
plus of $750,000 in the treasury. 

"From year to year more rolling stock and equip- 
ments are added and extensions made, and for all of this 
expense more bonds are issued and sold ; but as the road 
is now permanently established with undoubted pros- 
pects of increasing earnings, its bonds can be sold at par 
and on a 5 per cent interest basis. 

"We will now assume that it has been in operation 
for five years and in these years has added to its 
property $10,000,000, all paid for by the sale of its 
bonds and surplus earnings, so that the road cost is now 
$35,000,000. It has paid 1 per cent annual dividends, 
which is 10 per cent on the investments of the stock- 
holders, and there is an accumulative surplus of $2,500,- 
000. In such cases melon cutting is resorted to, which 
means that the surplus fund is cut down by issuing new 
stock to the stockholders, equal to the surplus. They 
hold this stock themselves or seU it. 

"If the net earnings are continually increasing, and 
reach 8 per cent, in such a ease more stock is issued so 
as to keep the dividend rate down to 6 per cent, at which 
rate stocks are considered to be worth par. In this man- 
ner the stock issues may be repeated indefinitely, being 
considered by railroad men legitimate, and by the people 
as watered, watered to the last degree. 



John Explains Stock Companies 63 

' ' By this process some people made immense fortunes ; 
but at the present time, since the railroad commission 
has been created which regulates such transactions, rail- 
road financiering has been greatly improved. 

"Well, Rose, this is sufficient water for you to floun- 
der in. Don't drown in it, and when I come back again I 
will show you how the water is squeezed out of stock. 
So long." 



CHAPTER X. 

How Water is Squeezed Out of Stock 

AFTER John had departed, Rose reflected on all that 
he had said. She was trying to measure, to grasp 
the immensity of millions, which for the first time had 
been brought to her attention. How insignificant now 
appeared to her the few hundreds of dollars they 
possessed. Now more than ever before did she realize 
how little their share is of the wealth of this country. 
Was not this all wrong? Should there not be a more 
equal distribution of wealth? 

Why should some who labor less than others be swel- 
tering in wealth while others more deserving are drudg- 
ing along in poverty? The social doctrine had taken 
possession of her which carried discontent in its train. 
Yies, this disturbed her former contentedness. The few 
dollars savings, which, until then, had been a pleasure to 
her, would now seem niggardly, petty amounts, and rob 
her of her former happiness. 

After John's return Rose related to him what she had 
gathered from his watered stock lecture, how unequally 
wealth is distributed, and she asked him why they were 
not allowed to share in it. 

John thought now that she had discarded woman's 
suffrage she would plunge into socialism. "Nothing pre- 
vents us from sharing in it," he said; ''but wait a 
little. After I have squeezed the water out of stock, 
these beautiful illusions will appear to you as old, 
64 



Watered Stock ■ 55 

washed-out rags which will completely change your pres- 
ent attractive view to a wretched one." 

Then John proceeded to explain how water is squeezed 
out of stock. He said, "Supposing the Home Railroad 
Company which we left as a money-maker, had, owing 
to competition or other causes, somewhat decreased its 
earnings, so that the inside ring agreed that no dividend 
should be declared at their annual meeting, of which 
neither the outsider nor the market had the least con- 
ception. At this stage the inside ring unload their stock 
at a good price, knowing that as soon as it is made pub- 
lic that no dividend can be paid, the stock will drop in 
the market. As soon as this happens they can buy back 
as much as is required to hold the controlling stock, at a 
greatly reduced price, from that at which it was sold, 
and this is done repeatedly. 

' ' The controlling interests of the railroad, by manipu- 
lating the funds of the company, know a year ahead 
what the report will show, by which the prices of bonds 
and stocks are governed, and in this manner they can 
fleece the lamb up and down according to their manipu- 
lations. 

"But these are only ordinary soft squeezes. Now I 
will describe the grizzly bear; no, I mean the bunny 
hug, which squeezes not only the water, but also some of 
the life blood, out of the railroad's bonds, which en- 
dangers the very life of the road. Let me show you how 
this is done. 

"We come to a time in the life of a railroad which by 
several years of failure to pay dividends had depreciated 
the value of its stock to a large extent. At such time it 
is stocked at $40,000,000 and bonded at $50,000,000, a 



66 John and Rose 

total of $90,000,000. At this capitalization, by stock 
speculation, the juggling of funds, and the manipulation 
of books, the directors can make a showing that the road 
does not earn the interest on its bonds, to say nothing of 
dividends on stock. 

"They then agree that the capitalization must be cut 
down to such a figure that it will earn interest and divi- 
dend. This is accomplished by resolving that they must 
default paying the interest on the bonds, which finally 
brings the road into the hands of a receiver. These 
proceedings scare the bondholders, and everybody else 
not inside the ring, into believing that the road is in a 
bad way, perhaps worse than it really is ; and so the in- 
side ring is the only intelligent bidder when ii is sold, 
and the members of the ring buy it at $35,000,000. In 
this way they squeeze out all of the $40,000,000 of stock 
and $15,000,000 of the bonds. The same directors and 
insiders reorganize the company on the reduced invest- 
ment, which enables them, to pay interest and a good 
dividend." 

Rose at this juncture asked, "Were you one of such 
fleeced lambs by your mining stock ? ' ' 

"Fleeced, not much. No, if I had only been fleeced I 
would have got a little on my stock, but I never got a 
red penny. I was buncoed when I entered the deal, 
slaughtered like a lamb. When you remind me about it 
I get so confounded mad I can hardly continue my de- 
scription and must cut it short. 

' ' In brief, everybody should keep clear of investing in 
stock unless they are in the inside ring, and even these 
are often frozen out. The minority stock is always at 
the mercy of the majority, and if this is in the hands 



Watered Stock 67 

of unscrupulous men you are sure to lose. It is worse 
than a gamble. Now you must not believe that I have 
told you all about the intricacies of stock jobbing. I 
confess that I only know the A B C of this subject, but 
it is a lesson sufficient to warn you. We will now hang 
our squeezed-out watered stock on the line to freeze out, 
another process stocks are liable to undergo, which 
owing to the freezing atmosphere I will not explain and 
will end the subject here." 

By this squeezing and freezing process Rose's fever- 
ish mind, which had been worked into a state of frenzy 
when John had painted the sunny side of stock specula- 
tion, was now cooled down to normal again. It proved 
the truth of the old proverb, "AU is not gold that glit- 
ters," which brought her back again to her former con- 
tented condition. 



CHAPTER XI. 

Rose Asks Why She Was A^ot Insured. John Explains, and Tells About 
Insurance Generally. Also About Taxation and Income Tax 

ON one sultry day there was a terrific wind storm, 
many roofs and chimneys were blown down ; when 
John returned home, he asked Eose: "Did you not fear 
that the house would blow down?" "Oh no," she re- 
plied, and described her sensations, how the house 
rocked, but she admitted she had some fear because she 
was not absolutely sure it was insured against cyclones. 
John laughed. ' ' But did you not fear for your own life, 
which is not insured ? ' ' 

"No, not at all. The safety of my investment con- 
cerned me most and crowded out the fear for my per- 
sonal safety." 

John asked, "So you have taken out cyclone insur- 
ance?" 

"I? No, did not you? Don't you know when we 
bought the house you reminded me of this danger ? You 
said we will make the Home Stock Company insure the 
house against cyclones. So you did not insure it ? " 

John, having become shy of lying, frankly admitted 
that he had not, and as an excuse said that he had had 
it in mind to do so, but that the danger was so remote, 
he had postponed it from day to day, owing mainly to 
the little expense of $3.25 for a $2,500 a year cyclone 
policy. But as he had now experienced how the mis- 
taken consciousness that it was insured had quieted 
Rose's apprehensions which, otherwise, might have been 



About Insurance 69 

a fatal shock to her, he resolved to insure against cyclones 
without fail. 

Kose was surprised that he had neglected this, as in all 
things he was so cautious. Everything of value he 
wanted bomb-proof. She said, "I have been wondering 
why you did not think of insuring my life as you have 
yours. Some day your blooming Rose will wither and 
will be blown into the cemetery. Or do you not consider 
me of sufficient value, or is the danger so remote as 
not to warrant the cost of the premium as in the cyclone 
case ? ' ' 

"Yes," John said, "I have thought of this, and I 
would insure you if I could against any contingency that 
would take you from me. But this is impossible. The 
only compensation I could secure is dollars. I have 
often thought that if you should die I surely would 
grieve to death, which would be my prayer. I could not 
live without you. 

"Now, if I should insure you for a good sum and you 
should die, it might happen that this balm would assuage 
my grief to such an extent that I could not die if I 
wanted to, the greatest misery that could befall me. I 
know many a widow whose sorrow was mitigated and 
disappeared in a short time because of a husband's life 
insurance." 

"Well, my dear John, this is certainly the most 
pleasurable confession you could possibly make to me. 
It cheers and makes me happy as nothing else could, to 
know that your love is assured to me and bomb-proof to 
the end of our day. ' ' 

John concealed his emotion, and spoke about the 
general blessings of insurance. "Yes, insurance is a 



70 John and Eose 

great benefit to mankind. It is the palliative of mis- 
fortune, hardly perceptible to those contributing. Take 
fire insurance, the largest protector of all. "Without it 
the whole people would be in continual fear for the 
safety of their property. Take life insurance ; how maily 
widows are saved from want and poverty and are placed 
in a comfortable situation in life, owing to a husband's 
life insurance. 

"Besides those enumerated, you can insure against 
accident, sickness, and burglars; in brief, against any 
conceivable loss at a small cost (premium) which is 
based on the general average rule. If it were not for 
insurance, progress in many instances would be re- 
tarded, and sometimes made impossible. ' ' 

Rose asked John the amount for which he was in- 
sured. 

He replied, "In all, three thousand dollars, payable 
after twenty years, or at any time before if I should die. 
For this I pay each year $105 premium, which is $2,100 
for twenty years, when my policies fall due, and I will 
get the $3,000 of insurance. You will observe that I will 
receive $900 more than I paid ; this is for compound in- 
terest. This, of course, is in case I live the whole twenty 
years. But supposing that after I paid my first year's 
$105 premium I had died the same year ; you would get 
the whole $3,000 insurance, for which the insurance 
company received only $105. In such case the gain 
would be $2,895. Some people cannot understand how 
this is possible, but it is. The insurance companies base 
their losses on their mortality tables, which were pre- 
pared after long years of experience, from which they 
can figure anticipated loss and cost, and by computing 



About Insurance 71 

compound interest they are able to determine within a 
small fraction how much premium they must charge 
each year. ' ' 

"John," said Rose, "You do not believe that if I 
should lose you, this $3,000 insurance would in the least 
mitigate my grief for you, do you?" 

"Well," John replied, "I don't know. I hope this 
will not be brought to a test, because I expect to be alive 
when my policy falls due, which will be in about eleven 
years. Then I shall get it myself. But if you should get 
it I hope it will bring you comfort, for this is the very 
purpose for which I have taken it out. ' ' 



TAXATION 

There is quite a discussion in the papers about taxing 
bonds and mortgages and as this may strike Rose's in- 
vestments she asked John how it might affect them. He 
pacified her on this point by the following treatise on 
double taxation. 

DOUBLE TAXATION 

Bonds are mostly issued by railroads and other large 
corporations, and are secured by a general mortgage on 
all their property. Because there are so many who own 
these bonds, the mortgage is held in trust by a trustee 
company for the benefit of all the bondholders. In case 
of default the trustee company is empowered to fore- 
close and sell and divide the proceeds pro rata among the 
stockholders. Bonds are practically the same as mort- 
gage notes, with this difference: that with an ordinary 
mortgage loan, the owner (mortgagee) gets the mortgage 



72 John and Rose 

with, the note and takes the place of the trustee com- 
pany, and must sue in his own name ; and further, the 
interest paid is endorsed on the note, while the bonds 
have for the interest little coupons attached to them, 
which are detached, and delivered to the mortgagor 
when paid. 

Mortgages and bonds are in some states unjustly 
treated by double taxation. For instance, our Home 
Stock Company is bonded or mortgaged for $2,500. In 
some states these would be taxed, say $40, then the 
house is taxed for $40, a total of $80, while, if it were 
not bonded or mortgaged the house would only be taxed 
$40. As this is so glaringly wrong, the laws in most 
states have corrected it. 

The reasons why this injustice has been so long per- 
mitted is that the people, in general, did not stop to 
more closely investigate taxation. One would say, I 
have to pay taxes on all I possess, say on $5,000, because 
it is visible and cannot escape the assessor's eye. My 
neighbor, who is worth $100,000, in mortgages, stocks 
and bonds, does not pay a dollar. Is this not a shame to 
tax the poor in favor of the rich? 

If we stop here without further investigation we 
would denounce this policy as an outrage and the capi- 
talist as a greedy tax dodger. But if we examine the 
case closer we will find that the capitalist's $100,000 is 
indirectly taxed the same as the $5,000 citizen. How? 
Because his $100,000 is invested in mortgages, bonds and 
stocks, which represent actual property, which is visible, 
and cannot escape the eye of the assessor any more than 
other property that is assessed. 

If he should be taxed on his interest in the properties 



About Insurance 73 

which are already taxed, for which he only holds a piece 
of paper, it would simply be double taxation. What 
would be the value of his mortgage, bonds or stocks if 
there were no actual property back of it? Nothing! 
This in later years has been so convincingly demon- 
strated by our Tax Commission, which has made taxation 
a study, that in our progressive state, double taxation 
is out of the woods and has entered the enlightened field 
of reason. Therefore, we need not fear double taxation 
in our state. 

There is another method of taxation, long in vogue in 
Europe, and to some extent in our country, which is the 



INCOME TAX 

This principle as to individuals is that he shall be tax 
exempt on his net income to the amount assumed 
sufficient for ordinary living expenses, but that any 
amount above this is liable to a tax on a progressive 
scale. For instance, if the exemptions should be $1,000, 
all income above this, up to $2,000, say, is taxed one-half 
per cent, the next $1,000 one per cent, the next $1,000 
one and a half per cent, and so on up to 6 per cent, which 
may be made the limit. 

The principle is just, and the tax the easiest to bear, 
because only those who are fortunate and can afford to 
pay are taxed. The more these fortunate ones pay, the 
better they should feel. Taxation, however, on an as- 
sessed value of their real estate may be just the reverse, 
because they may not derive enough income or none at 
all, to pay a tax with. The only objection to the income 
tax is its publicity, as it exposes the loss or gain of an 



74 John and Eose 

individual. This is obnoxious to most people, especially 
to those who have not progressed in the same way as 
their neighbors. 

Take a business man who is in debt, and knows before- 
hand that he can show no taxable income. He will 
worry because, if his creditors become acquainted with 
this fact, it may ruin his credit. The intention is, that 
the income tax shall supplant the personal property tax, 
so that all taxes shall be raised on real estate and in- 
come only. 



CHAPTER XII. 

Change to a More Affectionate Subject. First Silver Lake Picnic 

ROSE one day reminded Jolrn that so far their en- 
tire talk had been confined to the almighty dollar, 
stocks, bonds, coupons and compound interest. These 
were all dry subjects, of which we must have our fill. 
"It is getting monotonous. Don't you think we ought 
to change to a more affectionate, a more pleasing topic ? 
For instance, on our marriage bond, our little coupons 
and how they will compound? In the time we devoted 
to talking of stocks and bonds, no one would know 
from what we said, or failed to say, that we had any 
children at all, who are really worth more to us than all 
our dollars. It seems, that the almighty dollar has, after 
all, the greatest attraction for you men. ' ' 

"Yes, Rose, you are right, but there is a reason for 
this. When I arise in the morning, and take my break- 
fast, the children are asleep, and when I come home 
ofter supper, they go to sleep. The only time I can talk 
and play with them is a little at noon and Sundays, and 
when I want to play and talk with them, I cannot get 
a word in edgewise, because you monopolize the whole 
bunch. You know how modest I am, not caring to in- 
trude on your prerogative. Why should I disturb your 
reign, especially when all the children are so merry and 
bloom as a Rose ? 

* * The most effective way I can speak to them is when I 
let my pocket-book talk, when they are in need, and with 
75 



76 John and Eose 

this language I am filling my pocket-book from morn to 
night, at my desk, all for their benefit and comfort. Of 
course, I know that the almighty dollar is not all-power- 
ful and does not satisfy everything. Calling my atten- 
tion to this has stirred my mind about another duty to 
perform. So far our children have been so young, but 
now they are getting to that age when they interest 
themselves more and more in their surroundings, and I 
am thinking of giving them more attention than 
formerly, provided you will not interfere too much. 

' * I know some parents who are continually quarreling 
about what to say and what not to say to their children. 
The mother says in the children's presence that their 
father's talk to them will spoil them, and the father re- 
plies that her talk and education will make them society 
slaves, apes of fashion. 

' ' The little tots are between a cross-fire ; are educated 
to believe that they are good for nothing. The only way 
to prevent this friction and consequent bad influence, is 
that children should be mostly spoken to by one parent 
in the absence of the other. Rose, before I go to work 
let me suggest that we take a little outing to Silver Lake 
next week, on my day off. We will go for a whole day if 
the weather is favorable, which it generally is during 
this season of the year. We, of course, will take all the 
children with us, as they are all old enough now. Think 
it over. Good-bye." 

SILVER LAKE 

Rose was delighted by John's proposals. She had been 
longing for a diversion from the continued dry dollar 
subject, and a change to a more refreshing and romantic 



First Silver Lake Picnic 77 

one, in which they could breathe and move in pure coun- 
try atmosphere. Back to the soil and the beauties of 
nature ! 

She looked forward with much pleasure to the day 
when they would go out to camp. At this time Adam 
was 10, Eva 8, Henry 6, and George 3 years old. They 
were just at the ages when they could enjoy such an 
outing. She talked to them about it. She told them 
they would drive out to Silver Lake next week and re- 
main the whole day. She described to them Silver Lake 
as a beautiful sheet of water, with enchanting surround- 
ings. It is really two lakes, connected by a strait, the 
whole about one mile long. On the north, a little creek 
runs into it, and on the east one runs out of it. Both are 
like little harbors from which boats go in and out to 
the lake. 

In. the middle of the north lake is a small wooded 
island. Going around this we come to the strait from 
where we enter the upper lake. On the three miles shore 
line around the lakes is a cow path which may be walked 
with ease. 

To the west lies the beautiful convent with its dwell- 
ings, church, outbuildings and well kept gardens of 
vegetables, fruits and flowers. It is a paradise to look 
upon, especially from across the east bank of the lake. 
The convent is under the management of the Sisters of 
St. Francis, and at this time of the season, July and 
August, about 400 of the sisters return to it to enjoy 
their vacation. 

The shore lines are alternating hills and meadows. 
The beach on the east shore is gravel, and from it rise 
little hills, presenting ideal camping grounds. She told 



78 John and Rose 

them how they would go boating and fishing, and roam 
through the woods, listening to the birds, and that they 
would have to build a fire on which to prepare dinner. 
These descriptions so impressed their little minds with 
delight that they too were yearning for the approach 
of the picnic day. 

FIRST PICNIC 

The picnic day arrived. John's firm had given him 
the free use of one of their conveyances. The day 
promised to be an ideal one; bright skies, with a warm 
summer breeze stirring. When he drove up to the house 
all were in high glee and expectancy. The blankets, 
lunch and utensils were quickly brought out and packed 
in the surrey by the children, and away they drove, out 
to the country, which was all new to them. 

The children were continually asking about this and 
that which interested them. They drove past many 
different kinds of fields, all in luxurious growth. When a 
cow, horse, sheep or bird came to view they wanted to 
know all about it. As Silver Lake is only a four-mile 
drive, they were soon at their destination. As soon as 
they arrived they unharnessed the horse and tied it to 
a tree at the mouth of the creek. At that place there 
was an old boat into which their lunch was carried. 
Then the family got into it, and paddled, Indian fashion, 
to the gravelly beach on the upper lake to unload. 

From there the lunch was carried up the hill, under 
the trees, which place was chosen as the day's camping 
grounds. What a happy family to look upon! One 
vied with another to lend a hand in arranging matters. 
It was only 9 o'clock, and everything being in place. 



First Silver Lake Picnic 79 

some strolled along the beach or through the woods to 
get familiar with the surrouiidiiigs ; others rode in the 
boat and in that way loitered a few hours away. After 
that Rose called for volunteers to get some dry twigs to 
start a fire by which to prepare dinner, and soon the 
kettle was joining the merry twitter by singing its own 
song. 

While dinner was in preparation John attended to 
the horse to see that it fared well. He gave it oats and 
water and was then called to dinner. The dinner was 
spread on the grass and they aU agreed that it was the 
most delicious they had ever eaten. After dinner every- 
one assisted Eose in washing and cleaning up, except 
John, who lazily smoked his cigar. Everybody worked 
but father. When all the work was done some of the 
children rolled around the grass. John took Adam and 
Eva in the boat, fishing, and by good luck caught a half- 
dozen small perch. In this way the day passed all too 
soon. Rose enthused about the beauty of country life, 
how much superior it is to city life. John did not mar 
her pleasure in it, though he was on the point of re- 
marking that there were but few weeks in the year like 
that, and that most of the time it was cold and dreary. 
But he refrained from reminding her of it, as he was 
glad to have her retain her favorable impressions of 
country life, for he intended to move on a farm soon and 
spend his life there. 

Soon after, they heard the evening bells of the convent, 
the solemn tones stealing across the lake, reminding them 
that they must break camp and drive homeward. 

Everything and everybody was taken in the boat 
again, which was paddled back to the mouth of the 



80 John and Rose 

creek, to get ready for journeying homeward. For 
want of room the string of fish was tied to the hind axle 
of the surrey. After the horse was harnessed they 
drove home and on arriving found the fish were missing, 
which must have been torn loose. Their first picnic was 
the talk for days, and many others followed. Next day 
a business man known as a joker asked John how he 
liked the nice string of fish he caught the day before. 
John at once knew all, and not wanting to gratify the 
joker, by allowing him to enjoy his joke in his presence, 
quietly replied, "I always like fish, especially perch. 
They are delicious." The joker was perplexed, and the 
more he tried to draw out John to confirm his joke the 
more reticent John became, until, finally, the joker re- 
tired in disgust. Others told John that the joker had 
bragged about his wonderful exploit; how he drove be- 
hind John's buggy and when driving at a slow pace up 
a hill how his companion jumped out of the buggy and 
cut loose the string of fish, and how they enjoyed the 
meal. This is not a fish story. 



CHAPTER XIII. 

Second Picnic. John Relates How He Built a Boat Named 
Violet in His Boyhood 

THE children were continually asking their mother 
when and where they would go picnicking again. 
Their main talk was about the good time they had had. 
They rehearsed the little details over and over again. 
They asked their father also, and became more familiar 
with him, talking with him more freely than formerly 
because of the one-day picnic, which gave them an op- 
portunity to mingle with each other without restraint. 
Rose called John's attention to the felicitous change in 
their family life, suggesting that they should soon go 
camping again. 

John had thought about this ; he knew that the camp- 
ing season lasted but a short time, so it was agreed that 
they should go the following Sunday if weather per- 
mitted. When Sunday came they again went to Silver 
Lake. When they reached the mouth of the creek they 
were disappointed to find the boat missing, it having 
been taken by fishermen, who would not return until 
after dinner. Thereupon they walked to a small hill 
near the entrance where they established their camping 
ground for the day. The absence of the boat curtailed 
their sport to some extent, but they made up for this 
loss by other exercises. After dinner, while John was 
-smoking, the necessity of a boat, when camping, ap- 
peared most strikingly to him, and he expressed his in- 
tention of building one, with a sail on it. 

81 



82 John and Rose 

Rose asked him, ' ' Can you build a boat ? ' ' 

"Of course I can," John replied. "If I have not 
the time I will show a carpenter how to build it. If you 
will listen I will teU you the story how. 

"When my brother was about fifteen and I was about 
thirteen years old we were eager to build our own boat. 
We felt confident that we could build one, but lacked 
money to buy the required material. We figured that 
the lumber, nails and other things would cost about $5. 
One day when father was in a receptive mood we laid 
our plans before him. He seemed surprised. ' Can you 
build a boat?' he asked. 

"Yes," we assured him that we could, if he would 
give us $5. 'Boys,' he said, 'If you can build a boat as 
you describe I will give you $5. ' We told him the boat 
would be eighteen feet long by four and half feet wide, 
and of sufficient buoyancy to carry eight persons. We 
were gratified over our financial success, which encour- 
aged us in our undertaking. We selected our lumber 
at the saw mill, which cost three dollars. We had it 
hauled to our yard behind the house, and shipbuilding 
operations began. As we were both attending school we 
had to work after school hours. Our tools were primi- 
tive, therefore we were dubbed the jackknife carpenters. 
We had to plane the boards by hand, as there was no 
planing mill in the village. Father watched our progress 
with keen interest and was pleased with our skill. As 
he had in his early days followed the sea, boat building 
interested him. Our estimate of cost was too low, there- 
fore we had to strike him for a few dollars more, which 
he gladly contributed, because we had proved our 
ability. Building went along briskly. We painted the 



The Second Picnic 83 

outside of the boat white, with a red stripe, and the in- 
side light blue. The boat was christened Violet, and 
this name was painted on a violet leaf, made of tin. 

"We planned to launch the boat on the following Sat- 
urday evening. In those early days the store was the 
general meeting place ,for teamsters and choppers. 
When we were ready we told the men in the store to 
bring about half a dozen poles, three inches thick and 
eight feet long, on which the boat should be carried to 
the river. After the men had reinforced themselves by 
several horns of whiskey the Violet was lifted on their 
shoulders and carried from the yard to the -river. Before 
the procession started I jumped into the boat and was 
triumphantly carried to the river bank, from which the 
boat was launched with a hurrah. 

"After paddling the boat back and stepping on shore, 
my brother showed that he had been humiliated. 'Well, 
well,' he said, 'if you haven't got brass.' I asked him 
why. 'Why, you know, I did the most work in building 
the boat, and you want to take all the credit.' 1 
apologized and told him that in the excitement I had not 
thought of his objection. From then on we were boating 
all the time we could spare. One Sunday we gave our 
parents and the whole family a boat ride to the Rapids. 
The only mishap we had was when in a fresh breeze 
from the land, while sailing to Two Rivers, we were 
struck by a squall, which split the seat. The mast was 
held by this, and both it and the sail were thrown over- 
board. This looked from shore as if we had capsized, 
which suspicion soon spread to the village, bringing the 
people to the shore. Boats were dispatched, with life- 
savers, to rescue us; but they soon discovered that we 



84 John and Eose 

were in no danger. We laughed and merrily rowed our- 
selves home. Does this answer your question, Rose? 
Can I build a boat?" "I should say so," replied Rose. 

' ' Now that I have told you of the birth of our boat, the 
Violet, I will now tell you its sad end. 

"After several years of pleasure the Violet had given 
us, the novelty wore off. This always happens, espe- 
cially with boys. One fall the Violet got loose from her 
moorings, drifting out into the lake. We were informed 
of this by a man who told us he had hauled the boat on 
to the beach near the North pier. He said that she was 
but slightly damaged ; that she had sustained no further 
injury than a small hole in the bow. Which could be 
easily repaired; that she was safe where she was and 
that we could launch her at any time. We were profuse 
in thanking him, but he replied that this would not 
satisfy him, that he wanted $5.00 for salvage. We 
thought this was a hold-up, and told him that the boat 
only cost the amount he claimed as salvage. He was 
persistent, however, and advised us to take a look at her, 
and then to let him know what we intended to do. Now 
this was Violet's end: We left her where she was; we 
never took a step to visit her, never intended to repair 
her wounds, left her to the mercy of her fate, and never 
found out what was her ultimate end. ' ' 

This explanation aroused Rose, who chided John by 
saying, "How could you be so indifferent. You created 
and nursed her from the beginning, and she afforded 
you so much pleasure. How could you be so heartless 
as to abandon her?" 

' ' Since that time I have often been amazed about the 



The Second Picnic 85 

boat's abandonment myself, but I excuse that lapse by 
my youth. ' ' 

This answer did not quite satisfy Rose, who said, 
"While you allowed a frail, delicate thing like your 
Violet to drift to its doom, it could not have happened 
to your robust Rose, whose thorns would have caught 
something to hang on to before reaching the lake, which 
would have made her secure. But supposing that I did 
strand; would you treat me as a novelty, a worn-out 
novelty, to be cast off' as you did her ? ' ' 

John assured her that her fears were groundless. He 
told her that he was certain that the older married 
couples grow the more they become attached to each 
other. His reason for believing in this was, that when 
they became old no one else interested themselves for 
them and therefore each was more dependent on the 
other. In youth it is not quite the same. 



CHAPTER XIV. 

Adam's Twelfth Birthday. Gets a Yearly Allowance of $35. Deposits 
it in a Savings Bank 

ROSE called John's attention to Adam's twelfth 
birthday, which would be the following week. She 
told him as they had always intended to give each of 
their children an allowance at the age of twelve, this 
would be the proper time to do it, and the kind of pres- 
ent to give him. She had already fixed the amount at 
$35.00 the first year. As this would be the first large 
allowance that Adam had had in his possession, she 
wanted him to get acquainted with real money, and she 
therefore requested John to bring $5 in gold, a $5 gold 
certificate, a $5 silver certificate, a $5 greenback, a $5 
national bank note, $5 in $1 and $2 bills, 1 silver dollar 
and the balance in subsidiary and minor coins; in all, 
$35.00. 

To make sure that Adam could finance his year's ex- 
penses on the allowance, and to encourage him in his 
first year's efforts, she had provided him with a liberal 
stock of wearing apparel. She reminded John that 
when he presented the allowance, he must explain to 
Adam and the other children the different kinds of 
money, the value of each and its functions, and to see 
that they could count it correctly. 

Adam's birthday arrived, bringing together quite a 
gathering of companions, who wanted to share his joy 
over his presents; expecting, of course, that they would 
consist mainly of toys; but they were somewhat sur- 



Adam's Twelfth Birthday 87 

prised to see only barren money, the value of which they 
did not appreciate. 

John spread all the money on the table, ordered the 
children around him, and asked them to give him their 
attention : 

"First, my children," said John, "keep in mind that 
the unit of value of money is the gold dollar of a certain 
weight and fineness, which by the Jaw of the United 
States is a legal tender. All money, whether gold, silver 
or paper, is coined or printed by our government, and it 
has promised that all these different kinds of money 
shall be redeemable in gold on demand. 

' ' This $5.00 gold piece is equivalent to five $1.00 units. 
The government has ceased to coin $1.00 gold pieces. It 
now coins only $50.00, $20.00, $10.00, $5.00, and $2.50 
gold coins. 

"Now listen. This is a $5.00 gold certificate, which 
was given to some one who had more gold than he 
needed, so he gave it to the government for safe keeping. 
For it he received this certificate, the same as a receipt, 
for which the gold is returned on demand; therefore 
these certificates pass as money. This is a $5.00 silver 
certificate or note, treated the same as a gold certificate, 
and legal tender. This is a $5.00 greenback, redeemable 
in gold and legal tender. This is a $5.00 national bank 
note, not legal tender, but as it is fully secured, and 
redeemable in legal money, it passes at par. 

"These are one and two-dollar notes — greenbacks, 
silver notes, and national bank notes all redeemable in 
legal money. Now we come to the silver dollar and less 
than a dollar ; the change. This is a dollar, this a half- 
dollar, or 50-cent piece, this a 25-cent piece, and this a 



88 ' John and Rose 

10-cent piece in silver, and called our subsidiary coin. 
Now we come to the last of our minor coin, which is the 
nickel or 5-cent piece, and the copper cent. These are 
legal tender only up to $10.00. Now Adam, you and the 
others count the money and see if it is correct." It is 
$35.00 in all. 

They did as he requested. Adam, however, taught the 
others how to properly count it. 

After they had had their try at counting, John asked 
them if they knew the value of money. Some of them 
ventured to reply that it was to buy candy or other 
trifles with. John explained that this might apply to 
those who have an unlimited supply of money, but to 
those who have not and are restricted to a certain 
amount, the value is best realized by buying something 
of necessity or real value. "For instance, you can 
spend this $35.00 in a quarter of an hour for something 
which may injure your health, or fritter it away on 
something that will not do you a particle of good. On 
the other hand, it may last you a year, give you all that 
you require, and you may even have some left at the 
end of the year, and by this you will have enjoyed it 
more than if you had squandered it. ' ' 

"Now, Adam," said his father, "do you know how 
easy or how hard it is to earn money?" > 

' ' Yes, I know that it is not easy. I have been earning 
some for several years by doing errands. You and 
mother gave me a nickel and a dime once in a while for 
shoveling snow, but all that I have earned so far is about 
$5.00, of which I have saved and put into the savings 
bank about three dollars. I know that it is not easy as 
long as I am a boy, but wait until I am a man." 



Adam's Twelfth Birthday 89 

Tlie subject of the almighty dollar was now ex- 
hausted, and the children were called to proceed to the 
banquet table, which appeals more to children than does 
the money table. But before he left it Adam gathered 
up all the money and handed it to his mother for safe 
keeping. Since Rose was responsible to Adam for his 
$35.00 she had a little worry about it. Next morning she 
told him they had better deposit it in the savings bank, 
where it would be safer. So they walked to the bank, 
where Adam was introduced to the cashier. He brought 
forth his thirty-five dollars and laid it on the counter as 
a deposit, for which she asked to be given credit. 

The cashier asked him if he could write his name. 
Adam with pride answered, "Sure." 

The cashier gave him the signature book to write his 
name in, and remarked that it was not absolutely neces- 
sary, but the bank preferred the signatures of all its 
depositors. 

"If you want to draw out money, or deposit more 
money," said the cashier, "please bring your savings 
book along with you." 

"Sure." 

' ' Another thing : on New Year 's bring your book to 
the bank, so that we can credit the 3 per cent interest for 
the year and balance it. Don't forget this. Will you?" 

"Sure." 

Rose, feeling relieved of her responsibility, and Adam 
proud and with more confidence in his ability, they 
wended their way homeward. After arriving home Rose 
instructed Adam as to what the $35.00 really meant. 

"You see," she said, "out of this $35.00 you must pay 
for all your clothes, books and whatever else you may 



90 John and Rose 

want, of course, except board, which, we will furnish you 
free. Last year this cost about $25.00 ; if the same this 
year you can save $10.00. Now we will see what you 
will save. ' ' 

''Must I pay my doctor bill if there is any?" 
"No, I will gladly pay it if you only get well." 



CHAPTEB XV. 

The Rapids Picnic. John Tells of the Storming of the County Jail 

FOR a change Jolin suggested to Eose that it would 
be well to camp at the Rapids on the following 
Sunday, weather permitting. She agreed to it. It 
would be something new again. She prepared for this 
proposed picnic, which aroused the children to happy 
anticipation. She told them that the village was an 
older place than their own town, that it was once the 
county seat ; that in the earlier days it had several saw 
mills, and was a busy place of industry. It lies about 
three miles away, going by road ; but by the river, owing 
to its many bends, it is five miles. She told them that 
she was sorry that they did not have the Silver Lake 
boat. If they had, they could row down the river to the 
Rapids in it. 

The little village nestles in the valley, the most 
romantic and picturesque in the whole county. There 
are many beautiful camping grounds on the river bank, 
which are occupied when the weather is favorable. 
Every Sunday some come by buggy, others by boat, and 
some stroll out to this pretty spot on foot, so that the 
scene is quite animated. 

On the banks close to the river there are many varie- 
ties of trees, shrubs and wild flowers. To one of these 
pleasing spots they will go the first fine Sunday. 

When this Sunday arrived they tumbled into the sur- 
rey, and drove out to the Rapids. They selected their 
91 



92 John and Rose 

camp on the highest ground, on a round top, from which 
the view is unsurpassed for beauty. The river flows in 
graceful turns below. The village lies beyond it, the 
village mill in the distance, also the old church, over 
sixty years old. In the valley beyond, the grounds are 
elevated. Near the banks of the river were different^ 
groups of picnickers, whole families, and the scene had a 
holiday aspect, so varying and interesting. 

After dinner the little family, lying on the grass, 
listened to John's story, the most noteworthy historical 
event of the Rapids, which happened over sixty 
years ago. 

THE STORMING OF THE EAPIDS JAIL 

"About sixty years ago a Mr. C lived across from my 
father's store. He was quite a philosopher in a way, 
and one of those restless reformers, of which so many 
in 1848 drifted from Germany across the ocean, coming 
to this land of liberty. He was the tallest man in the 
village, carried himself erect, and made quite a distin- 
guished appearance. Although he possessed only a 
couple of thousand dollars, he was considered the 
Crcesus of our village. He had no regular occupation 
except loaning out his money at from 12 to 20 per cent 
interest, the income from which was sufficient for his 
needs. He smoked incessantly his long German pipe. 

' ' Having plenty of leisure he was wont to come to my 
father's store every day. He would philosophize, mor- 
alize and criticise everything and everybody, and as my 
father in his younger days, when a sailor, had navigated 
to many foreign lands, he was interested to listen to the 



The Rapids Picnic 93 

description of these countries, and the telling of adven- 
tures that my father had experienced. 

"It seemed he had expected more of the blessings of 
liberty than were apparent. He said he had left his 
fatherland mainly because there was no equality of op- 
portunities, which he imagined was the reason why his 
abilities were ignored there, and which he expected 
would be recognized in this land of the free. With this 
hope he tried to enter into politics, and yet on occasions 
he would find fault with them. 

"In his conceitedness he believed that he was es- 
pecially fitted to hold some kind of office which would 
give him an opportunity to introduce reforms, and to 
which he could devote all his time, in spite of the fact 
that he could not speak English. One day he came to 
our store and orated in such a continuous stream on the 
approaching election that his pipe went out every little 
while. A few days later he told father of his first ex- 
perience of a caucus, where, it seems, he went for the 
purpose of trying to be nominated for an office. He 
raged furiously about its proceedings. 'This you call 
the people's rule, freedom and equality. Why, non- 
sense,' he said, 'three men ruled the whole caucus. One 
moved Mr. A as chairman, another seconded the motion, 
and A took the chair. Then A nominated B for clerk, 
seconded by C, and the chair said, "Carried." Those to 
be nominated for office were nominated in the same man- 
ner, when the chair declared them elected and warned 
them to hold on to it. When I attempted to deliver my 
elaborately worked out speech, I was told the meeting 
had adjourned. Adjourned — what does that mean? 
And they had the impudence to translate it to me as 



94 John and Rose 

meaning, ' ' all is over, now go home. ' ' I was struck dumb. 
Is this land of freedom a farce? "We say intelligence 
rules. Pshaw! Ignorance, impudence and impotence 
are the ruling spirits. I left my fatherland just on ac- 
count of opportunity and here I find it is more re- 
stricted than over there. 0, what a fool I was to listen 
to the alluring representations of the liberties of this 
country ! Had I only remained where I was, so well es- 
tablished and comfortable. Even if they keep you out 
of office they will not allow you to dissent or express 
your opinions. Why, this is worse than Russia. ' 

"In this strain he kept on for some time. 

"Father asked him how he expected to make a speech 
in German, which is not the language of this country, 
and which could not be understood by Americans. 

" 'No,' he said, 'but there were no Americans there, 
all Germans, who could not have understood an English 
speech, any more than I could have delivered one. ' 

"But now comes the climax. The legislature had 
passed the first liquor license law. Some one had 
violated it by selling liquor without a license, and was 
imprisoned in the county jail, which at that time was 
located at the top of the hill, just west of where we are 
lying, in a small log house. Rapids at that time was the 
county seat. This was a direct aggression on the per- 
sonal liberty so dear to the heart of a German, and must 
not be tolerated without the severest protest. Nothing 

could have aroused our Reformer C more then to 

inspire a rebellion than the restriction of what he be- 
lieved human rights. So far he had confined his de- 
nunciations to words; now he would resort to actual 
warfare. One afternoon he gathered around him about 



The Rapids Picnic 95 

six of his accomplices and marched them in front of my 
father's store. They carried a long pole as the weapon 
with which they proposed to ram the Rapids jail, and 
liberate the prisoner. 

"Before leaving, each took a drink of whiskey, which 
was free in those days. Father was invited to join them, 
but he smilingly declined. The captain ordered 'shoul- 
der arms,' which brought the pole to their shoulders, 
and with stimulated courage the defenders of personal 
liberty marched lustily toward the battle ground at the 
Rapids. They soon arrived at the foot of the hill, 
climbed up, and were commanded to point the ram 
toward the jail door, while the captain demanded the 
release of the prisoner, or the jail would be stormed. 

"But the sheriff, Mr. Schneider, had been informed, 
and said, 'I guess not,' and pointing a revolver held in 
each hand at the captain, commanded in behalf of the 
State of Wisconsin that they disperse in a minute or 
he would blow their heads off. Although the captain 
could not understand, this to him was more a mystery 
than adjournment, which was told him meant, 'all over, 
go home.' He accepted it in the same sense, with a 
more clear conception by the revolvers showing him the 
way. There our hero stood, terrified by the sight of the 
deadly guns pointed at his face. He was so dazed that 
he kept his eye on the mouth of the revolvers as if in 
that way he could dodge the balls, and when at last he 
risked to look around he saw that all his volunteers were 
out of range and sight. This struck him was the best 
safeguard for him to take, so he got in line of retreat. 

"But instead of retreating in a body as they had 
come, each one skipped home out of sight of one another, 



96 John and Eose 

as they dreaded to look in one another 's face under such 
ignominious retreat. 

"The whole afternoon the villagers were kept in a 
state of excitement, and were curious to know about the 
battle at the Kapids. The day crept along toward eve- 
ning, and no news of any kind as to how they might have 
fared. Night and darkness rested on the scene, yet 
none had returned, and nothing was heard from them. 
It seemed they had purposely awaited the darkness to 
shelter them, and in this manner had arrived home as 
martyrs of a lost cause. Next morning, of course, this 
little exploit was the talk and ridicule of the whole 
village, except the actors, who kept aloof and silent. 

"There was quite a discussion of the aifair in my 
father's store. But our regular guest, the gallant Capt. 

C was absent. Although the license law was alleged 

to be unconstitutional, my father did not agree to this, 
saying the people rule and make the laws, and therefore 
should be upheld. Gradually our valiant captain ven- 
tured a little out on the sidewalk, and finally to father's 
store again. 

"The villagers having had so much pleasure out of 
this episode, and father believing the captain was 
sufficiently humiliated, did not try to add to it. He 
made no mention of the fiasco, but at once led to the 
general topic of the day, in which the captain entered 
with zest, so as to forget his mortification. 

"This was his first and last notable act in which he 
played a leading part. But few are now alive who ex- 
perienced it. As his wealth had always been overes- 
timated he persistently protested that he was taxed too 
high, and when in spite of it he could get no relief, he 



The Rapids Picnic 97 

felt as being persecuted. To evade this he moved just 
across the city line where after a few years he passed 
away at a ripe old age." 

After John had told his story the' children roamed 
through the woods and down to the river bank to pick 
flowers. When Eva returned with a large bunch of vnld 
flowers, in which were a few wild roses in the last stage 
of bloom, her mother said, "This will be the last rose 
this season, Eva. Don't these remind you of 'The Last 
Rose of Summer,' you memorized and liked so much? 
Recite it, and let us hear how well you have retained it 
in your mind." Whereupon Eva recited it with great 
composure. 

THE LAST ROSE OP SUMMER 

'Tis the last rose of summer, 

Left 'blooming alone; 
All her lovely companions . 

Are faded and gone; 
No fioiver of her kindred, 

No rose-Tjud is nigh. 
To reflect hack her Mushes, 

Or give sigh for sigh! 

' I'll not leave thee, thou lone one. 

To pine on the stem; 
Since the lovely are sleeping. 

Go sleep thou with them. 
Thus kindly I scatter 

Thy leaves o'er the bed. 
Where thy mates of the garden 

Lie scentless and dead. 



98 John and Rose 

So soon may I follow, 

When friendships decay, 
And from Love's shining circle 

The gems drop away! 
When true hearts lie withered, 

And fond ones are flown, 
Oh! ivho would inhabit 

This Meak world alone f 

These verses had affected Rose and she said, "How 
nice, these few simple verses, how they stir the emo- 
tions, of young and old, and are as widely kno^vn as 
the rose itself. Say, Eva, don't the thought of the dy- 
ing of the rose sadden you?" "No," said Eva, "it 
might if I did not know that they will be alive again 
next summer when I will see them again." "Then," 
said Rose, "you will not grieve when I die because you 
will see me again, will you?" "Yes," replied Eva, "I 
will because if you die I will not see you again next 
summer like the wild rose. I shall have to miss you for 
a long time, till after I am dead. This would be awful." 
"Yes," said Rose, "but the belief that we will meet 
again would greatly alleviate your grief, would it not ? ' ' 
' ' Of course, without this hope I could not bear it at all, ' ' 
said Eva. "How blessed you are, Eva, that you are 
possessed of this faith. Cling to it and nurse it all your 
life and it will lighten your sorrows." 

They now all proceeded to where the other picnickers 
played different games and watched their vacillating 
fortunes. 

Finally the evening approached to obliterate the 



The Rapids Picnic 99 

beautiful day they so much enjoyed, to be added to the 
many others they have stored in their memory, which in 
later days when recalled will be a bright spot to dwell 
upon. With these happy thoughts the little family 
drove homeward. 



CHAPTER XVI. 

Adam Goes to College 

THERE comes a time in the life of most parents when 
they are confronted with the problem: what shall 
or can we do for the future welfare of our children? 

Many a day they discuss this question, especially as 
to their boys; where shall we place them? what shall 
be their vocation in life ? 

It is not an easy question to solve, especially when 
the expense must be considered. This causes many a 
great deal of worry, and so it did John and Rose, be- 
cause their son Adam had arrived at an age when a 
decision had to be made as to his future prospects. 

They had often talked it over with him, and as he 
seemed to be inclined to favor a commercial career it 
was decided that he should take a college course, and 
trust to future developments to determine what par- 
ticular branch of activity he might prove best fitted for. 

As the expense in accordance to their means would be 
considerable, John consulted the compound interest 
table (Chapter V) and found that at his age, now forty- 
three years, his investment fund had accumulated to 
$4,990.42, and Rose's to $2,495.21. 

They could draw on their investment fund for the ex- 
pense of Adam 's education, but this they were reluctant 
to do, because it had proved so prosperous. 

John found another resource. His $3,000 life insur- 
ance policies would be due in a few years, on which the 
100 



Adam Goes to College 101 

savings bank would gladly make temporary advances: 
so this source would furnish the required funds, if neces- 
sary. 

As this was the first time Adam left his parental roof, 
and perhaps the last time he would be under its guid- 
ing influence, the parting scene was a most affectionate 
and pathetic one. Rose, in Adam's presence, had packed 
his trunk, and given him abundant motherly advice ; but 
as John feared it might be forgotten, he added the fol- 
lowing precept, which he hoped would be a reminder, 
and forever engraved on his memory. 



FAREWELL TO ADAM 

The first time in your life 
You'll leave your parents' home 
To enter a more ardent strife, 
As yet to you unknown. 

You'll miss your hirthplace, happy spot, 
The school 'bell's calling tones, 
Companions in the school yard's lot. 
With whom you used to roam.. 

You'll miss the dearest to your heart. 
Your kindred — parents, brothers; 
And pain the most when you depart 
From your ever guiding mother. 

Although you'll leave these happy scenes, 
A father and a mother's care, 
Remember these, and it will seem 
If all again united were. 



102 John and Eose 

Be always kind, frank, and polite. 
True to yourself, to one and all; 
These are the virtues of a life 
Sure to succeed and not to fall. 

Never forget your mother's moral lessons. 
Sincerely given to attain your happiness, 
Adhering to these will he the greatest Messing 
You can lestow on her — this my request. 

So now farewell; and our best wishes follow 
You in your college life at every stage. 
Our prayers, which you must ever hallow. 
Will be imprinted on life's youthful page. 

So Adam departs with his parents' blessing upon him, 
and their loving eyes follow him till he disappears from 



CHAPTER XVII. 

The High Cost of Living Induces Them to Sell Their House and Buy and 
Move on a Farm 

THE high cost of living, especially of food stuff, the 
products of the farm, brought on a nation-wide 
discussion in which Rose got interested, as it touched 
her pocketbook. She turned to John for an explanation. 
John said, ''This is simple. The cause is supply and 
demand. Because the population in cities is so immense- 
ly increasing, so the demand proportionately increases; 
and as the population on the farm has not increased in 
like proportion, the products of the farm have not in- 
creased up to the increased demand, and it naturally 
follows that the prices are raised." 

Rose thought that if the farmer got so much more 
than he used to get for his products, he must be in pros- 
perous condition. 

John replied, "Yes, he ought to be. In former years 
he did not get that which he was entitled to. I know 
that in the early days the farmer received for his labor 
far less than for the same labor performed in cities. 
This is self-evident, because the growth in population 
of cities is far outstripping that of the farms." 

"Will this adjust itself soon?" Rose asked. 

"Oh, yes, in time; but farm products may still have 
to be raised in price to give sufficient inducement for 
this adjustment. But when or how soon this leveling up 
process wiU be reached, is hard to forecast. 

"Rose, it seems you look with envious eyes on the 
103 



104 John and Rose 

farmer's life. Would you like to share his lot? We 
could raise our food stuff, sell the surplus, and the high- 
er the price the better we will be off. ' ' 

"Why, yes," said Rose, "you know that I always 
liked country life. I am sure I will be more contented 
on a farm than I am here, especially now when it seems 
more profitable. But can you explain why in the face 
of this, it requires greater effort to keep the boys on the 
farm, and to persuade others who have left it to go back 
to the farm?" 

"Yes," said John, "city life will always be more 
attractive to the young than the farm. They see, hear, 
and read of the great wealth, the conveniences, luxury, 
entertainments, and many other inducements that cities 
offer that are not obtainable in the country. Naturally 
young people yearn for this opportunity, though not one 
in a thousand attains the goal he expects. Still they 
have hope, they are ambitious to get that for which they 
are striving, and hence they gamble for it. This they 
would rather do than drudge along on a farm. 

' ' Let me review my own case. I came to the city and 
took the best position I could get, but I never expected 
to remain long in it. I always watched for a better one, 
hoping against hope. But it never came, therefore I am 
in it yet ; and I consider myself fortunate that I am, as 
I have fared far better than the large majority who 
leave the farm for city life. 

"Rose, do you know that I have been with my firm 
for nearly twenty-six years, a long time, doing prac- 
tically the same office work day after day? It does be- 
come monotonous, but it would be far more so if my em- 



Buy and Move on Farm 105 

ployers interfered in ray work, and did not give rae 
absolute control over my department. Nevertheless I 
do not feel absolutely independent. I am paid $1,200 a 
year salary. I know that this is the limit. I know by 
the books that they cannot afford to raise it, nor could 
I ask it. I know, too, that the firm could get younger 
men at half the salary I am getting, who would do the 
work as well or better. This knowledge makes me feel 
as if I am receiving charity, which is harder to bear 
than labor. I dread the future outlook, but I know also 
that my employers dread to discharge me, and they 
will put it off as long as possible. But I know that it 
must come in conformity with the present trend of the 
times, which means that younger men replace the older. 

"Yes, Rose, I have been thinking about the inevitabil- 
ity of this situation for some time. I consider ourselves 
fortunate that we have saved enough so that it will 
enable us to acquire a farm; and though we may not 
have as large an income as my present one, still we can 
live cheaper on a farm. Taking all the conditions under 
mature consideration, I am willing and as you say you 
are, to enter on a new field of life, which I hope and 
believe will prove a satisfactory change. ' ' 

Since the home was purchased ten years ago, it had 
been kept in good condition, and as the city had had 
quite a growth, John found a purchaser who would buy 
it for $4,000. Before selling he looked around for a 
farm and found one of 80 acres, bordering on a river 
running into the lake, which just suited him. It could 
be bought for $10,000, with everything on it. He spoke 
to Rose about it, and she thought favorably of the tract ; 



106 John and Rose 

but she did not know how they could raise the money. 
John, of course, had been calculating on the same prob- 
lem, and explained: 

""We again must have the aid of our Trustee Company 
in this transaction. The Home Stock Company (keep 
in mind this is you and I) makes out a deed to the pur- 
chaser of the house, delivers it to the Trustee Company, 
together with the $2,500 bonds we hold on it, and a re- 
lease of mortgage with instructions to deliver all to the 
purchaser on the payment of $4,000, which the Trustee 
Company credits to the Home Stock Company. This 
completes the transaction as far as the house is con- 
cerned. ' ' 

Rose was puzzled about the Home Stock Company 
muddle, and she said, ' ' The house is gone, our bonds are 
gone, the mortgage is canceled ; what have I to show for 
my $1,000 bonds, which are canceled?" 

"Don't be alarmed," said John; "don't you see the 
Home Stock Company has $4,000 in the Trustee Com- 
pany, out of which it pays or credits you $1,000 for 
your bonds, pays or credits me $1,500 for my bonds, 
and then it has left $1,500, the profit on the house. Was 
this not a splendid investment ? 

"Now our stock comes into play. When we took it 
it was worth nothing. Now the twenty-five shares, 
$2,500 normal value, are worth $1,500, of which your 
share will be $600 and mine $900. So you see although 
our shares had no value when we got them, yet under 
favorable conditions they acquired it. This we must 
ascribe to extraordinary luck which rarely repeats it- 
self. Do you understand no^v ? ' ' 

"Yes," Rose answered, "but my investment fund is 



Buy and Move on Farm io7 

$1,000 less than before, as that amount of bonds is can- 
celed. Is this not so ? " 

"Yes, that is so, but you have instead $1,000 cash in 
the Trustee Company, and we will have it reinvested in 
a day; the same way we invested it when we bought 
the house. If this is clear to you we will consider the 
house deal closed, and I will proceed to explain how we 
will finance the farm purchase. 

"Now listen! The Home Stock Company (you and I) 
buy the farm for $10,000, pay $1,500 cash, which is our 
profit on the house, and is deposited with the Trustee 
Company, and raise the balance of $8,500 by the sale of 
four per cent bonds. Of these bonds I take $1,500 ; you 
$1,000 and pay this hy cash we have in the Trustee 
Company derived from the house bonds. This will ab- 
sorb the $4,000 received for the house, and replace your 
$1,000 and my $1,500 house bonds. Then there will be 
$6,000 left, to be provided for, for which the Home Stock 
Co. will issue bonds, of which I take $3,600, and you 
$2,400. To pay for these we will again have the Trustee 
Company sell the same amount from our investment 
funds, so that our investment fund will be precisely the 
same as before you surrendered your $1,000 bonds and 
I my $1,500 house bonds, which fund stood then and 
stands now as follows : 

"My investment, $5,805.60; yours, $2,902.80 (see table 
15-year period). 

The Home Stock Co.'s assets of the farm cost. $10,000.00 
Liability mortgaged for 8,500,00 



Balance, surplus $1,500.00 



108 John and Rose 

"This surplus is now the value of our equity in the 
farm. 

"If we should rent the farm for $400 a year this 
equity would pay four per cent dividend." 

Rose disliked being a party to a soulless body. She 
would have liked to have got out of the Home Stock 
Company. It was such a bewildering affair. She could 
not clearly understand it. She asked John, "Why not 
dissolve it and change it to natural, soulful persons. 
In this way," she said, "we would jointly own the farm, 
of which your share would be three-fifths and mine two- 
fifths. This would be simpler, would it not?" 

"Yes and no," he replied. "The difficulty is that if 
the farm is in our name we cannot well bond and mort- 
gage it to ourselves, which is entirely proper to do to a 
third party. In this matter we can better keep our invest- 
ment fund intact, as the stock company must pay us the 
interest through the Trustee Company, while, if we had 
to pay the interest to ourselves we might neglect to do it. 
No, I think our Home Stock Company is all right, espe- 
cially as it has served well so far. The little tangle it 
sometimes gets you into I will gladly unravel. Only 
keep in mind that you and I are the stock company, and 
still better, divorce from your mind the Home Stock 
Company, and I shall from now on treat and speak of it 
as our farm, which it really is, and then you will under- 
stand it. ' ' 

As everything was satisfactorily arranged John pro- 
ceeded to sell the house, and bought the farm on the 
conditions as planned. After the purchase was com- 
pleted John named it the Rosedale Farm. The furni- 
ture was moved to it, and with good-bye to the old 



Buy and Move on Farm 109 

home, and with hopes for the future, the family changed 
from city to farm life. While they did not expect to 
make a fortune on the farm, they would be content if 
they continued to save from the yearly income sufficient 
to add $200 to John's and $100 to Rose's investment 
fund. 



CHAPTER XVIII. 

First Year on the Farm. They Take an Inventory at the Beginning 

FROM this time on John would get no salary, and 
Rose no allowance. Their sole income had to be de- 
rived from the earnings of the farm, except that on the 
investment fund, which they were very solicitous to keep 
intact. At this time John had $300 and Rose had $100 
in the savings bank. On this they would draw against 
for supplies until they got an income from farm prod- 
ucts, and such advances would later be reimbursed. 
John inventoried and classified the farm property with 
the following results: 

INVENTORY AT THE BEGINNING OF FIRST YEAR 

80 acres land @ $70 $5,600.00 

1 dwelling 1,600.00 

1 barn 1,000.00 

1 stable 300.00 

Rosedale Farm $8,500.00 

3 horses @ $150 $ 450.00 

12 cows @ $50 600.00 

Live Stock $1,050.00 

1 wagon $ 50.00 

1 buggy 100.00 

1 sleigh 30.00 

2 harnesses 50.00 

Vehicles $ 230.00 

110 



First Inventory on The Farm m 

1 plough $ 15.00 

1 harrow 10.00 

1 binder 80.00 

1 mower 30.00 

1 reaper 40.00 

1 hayrack 20.00 

1 set of tools 25.00 

Implements $ 220,00 

Total $10,000.00 

For the foregoing he opened accounts in his ledger, 
using a page for each account, and from these drew the 
following : 

trial balance beginning first year 

Assets. Page Dr. 

Rosedale farm and buildings 1 $ 8,500.00 

Live stock 2 1,050.00 

Vehicles 3 230.00 

Implements 4 220.00 

$10,000.00 
Liabilities. Page Cr. 

Bills payable 5 $ 8,500.00 

John's 3/5 equity 6 900.00 

Rose's 2/5 equity 7 ' 600.00 



$10,000.00 



When John made the inventory it occurred to him 
that it would be best to follow Rose's suggestion to dis- 
solve the Home Stock Company and assign the mort- 
gage to them and leave it with the Trustee Company. 



112 John and Rose 

In this manner the Trustee Company would see to it 
that the four per cent interest on the mortgage and 
the four per cent interest on John's three-fifths share 
of $900 and on Rose 's two-fifths share of $600 would be 
paid. Out of this income John expected to derive his 
$200, and Rose her $100, which they required for the 
annual 'addition to their investment fund which the 
Trustee Company would invest for them. The Rosedale 
Farm, of which John owned three-fifths and Rose two- 
fifths, would be jointly operated by them. The opera- 
tion would be recorded in the books, which would dis- 
close at the end of each year, after an inventory was 
taken, what each had contributed and used. Of the 
gain John would be entitled to three-fifths and Rose 
two-fifths. As the bank was not as easy of access as when 
they dwelt in the city, they had to have a larger cash 
reserve and had to keep a cash account. 

The larger accounts could be paid by check, but for 
the smaller, cash was needed, and of these they kept ac- 
count in a small pocketbook, in which could be entered 
all items paid and received, and posted when time per- 
mitted. 

This going back to nature's soil was accompanied by 
hard work and long hours, which at first taxed their 
vitality. But bodily exercise and plenty of fresh air 
resulted in good appetites and sound sleep. The luxur- 
ious city life had been replaced by the simple life, which 
had its disadvantages; but the gain in independence, 
the more direct interest in all that was labored for, light- 
ened the burden and outweighed the disadvantages. 

As it was a new enterprise to them, it was most inter- 
esting and kept their minds and bodies fully occupied. 



CHAPTER XIX. 

John Receives $1,000 on His First Life Insurance Policy. 
Donates It to Charity 

JOHN received a letter from the North. Western Life 
Insurance Company notifying him that his twenty- 
year $1,000 policy had become due, to send in the policy, 
and they would send a draft for the amount. He in- 
formed Rose of this and exclaimed : " Oh my, how these 
twenty years have flown ! Do you know where the policy 
is ? " Yes, she knew. She searched in her drawer, found it, 
and handed it to John, who unfolded it and read, "Pay- 
able to your wife. Rose." He had forgotten this, but 
now it was clearly revived. ' ' Say, Rose, can you recall 
when I took out the policy twenty years ago? I caUed 
your attention and poiiited to where it says payable to 
Rose ? " "Of course I do, and very distinctly, because in 
the same breath you made it payable to yourself by say- 
ing, 'If I should be living when the policy becomes due, 
and be in good health, in good circumstances, and can 
afford it, I shall give it to charity.' " 

John once more looked over the policy and said, 
"Rose, this $1,000 really belongs to you, don't it?" 

"No," said Rose, "I believe it belongs to neither of 
us, since you have pledged it for other purposes. ' ' 

John said, "Yes, I know; but that was at the time 
when I was head over heels in love with you and the 
whole world and in such a riotous condition of the heart 
no one can be held responsible for any foolish act he 
may perform." 

113 



114 John and Eose 

"I cannot believe," said Eose, "that you try to find 
a way by which you can desecrate your vow. Of 
course not. The only way you could justify it would 
be in ease you were sick, or not in good circumstances 
and could not afford to give it. But fortunately neither 
of these conditions exists, and you may feel glad that 
you cannot offer them as an excuse for retaining the 
$1,000 for your own benefit. You cannot better express 
your thanks for the general good health and fortune 
with which you have been blessed for these twenty 
years than by giving this $1,000 to charity as you prom- 
ised to do. As far as my interest in it is concerned, if 
any, I will gladly contribute it, knowing that you and 
I. will derive more pleasure from it in giving it in this 
way than to spend it in any other way. ' ' 

"Yes," John said, "you may be right. I had in 
mind to build a launch when I got this money, in which 
I could give" our neighbors and friends frequent little 
rides, which would be a pleasure to them, and in this 
way I persuaded myself I would fulfill my vow, only in 
a little different form,- But I am glad your pure soul 
has brought me back to the path of righteousness. My 
$2,000 policy will become due next year, and I can build 
the launch anyway." 

To make sure that he could afford to give the $1,000 
away he looked at the books to see how he and Eose 
stood financially and found their investments worth 
$8,707.40. After giving away $1,000 it would decrease 
their net worth only $700, "vvhich now appeared on the 
books as owing to John by the North Western Life In- 
surance Company for premiums paid, which will have to 
be canceled. The other $300 to make up the $1,000 is the 



Insurance Policy Matures 115 

compound interest or profit on the premiums paid during 
the twenty years. John said, ''Well, this is not bad; 
our savings have accumulated from $1,500 to $8,707.40 
in fifteen years, and I hardly think I could plead truth- 
fully that I could not afford to give $700 of it to 
charity. ' ' 

Rose said, "Of course not. Say, to what charity did 
you intend to give it ? " 

"Yes, Eose, to whom to give it where it will do the 
most good. This was settled in my mind once when in 
a reminiscent mood. I searched to find my first impres- 
sion of real joy or happiness, and at once found it to 
be when I received my first Christmas present. Now, 
Rose, let me acquaint you with the Christmastide in 
my youth. 

"Christmas gifts were in those days presented in the 
morning of that day. The evening before the children 
were sent to bed early, after which the parents would 
set a little evergreen tree on a table and trim it with a 
few apples, candy, fantastic cakes, colored paper, and, 
in most cases, common tallow candles. When all was 
completed these were lighted long enough to burn down 
the long wicks. Under the tree on the table a plate was 
placed for each child filled with a few apples, a hand- 
ful of nuts, some fantastic pastry, and candy. We 
children, in our joyful expectancy, lingered long before 
we could fall asleep. In the morning we would be up 
when it was still dark and find the little tree lit up in 
its glory. Each would in excitement find his plate which 
held its long-looked for presents ; the value of each plate 
did not exceed ten cents, and the whole outfit not over 
one doUar ; and yet how much childish joy did it bring 



116 John and Eose 

the children. This, then, was the first happy moment 
I could remember. 

' ' The second Christmas most vivid in my memory was 
when a baker invited the neighboring children to cele- 
brate at his house. There was a large tree in the middle 
of a large room. After all had partaken of cakes and 
sweets to their hearts' content, all joined hands and 
danced and sang till late into the night and were ex- 
hausted. The first Christmastide we jointly celebrated 
was, you remember, when we were engaged, and I came 
to your house every evening to build a toy village to 
be presented to my sister's children on the coming 
Christmas. Were these not happy eveninges while we 
were building it? 

"The plat of the village was made of boards 3x3 feet 
in size. In the back was a mountain constructed from 
pasteboard, coated with sand, pebbles, crushed glass, and 
green worsted to represent grass. Inside of the moun- 
tain was a tin can to be filled with water to run down 
and drive the water wheel of a mill on the river in the 
village. This river ran through the village and the water 
emptied into a pail below. 

"The gardens in the village were also sodded with 
green worsted. Then there were dwellings, outhouses, 
a church, and trees along the streets. Do you remem- 
ber. Rose, to get these trees was the most difficult task? 
I had to go into the woods and hunt for them. I did 
this when a light snow had fallen, just enough to find 
them the easiest. They were of a moss species, about 
two inches high, and represented miniature trees to per- 
fection. The final act of our creation was when we put 



Insurance Policy Matures 117 

our seal on it by cutting our tiny photographs and seat- 
ing ourselves in the summer house in the garden. 

"After having worked for over a month on this 
miniature village it was completed and brought to my 
sister, who used it many a year in front and under her 
Christmas tree. After that, you know, we used it for 
our children on Christmas. 

"After all these happy associations it is natural that 
when I looked around for a medium through which I 
could bestow happiness with the modest means at my 
command I came to the conclusion that this would be 
a Christmas fund, to be drawn upon every Christmas 
in favor of the poorer children. The little city I in- 
tended donating this $1,000 to had about forty on the 
poor fund list. The interest from this fund would give 
each child many times the amount that I received as 
my Christmas present, which, although extremely 
meager, was greatly enjoyed. 

"You will recollect one Christmas, Rose, when we 
overburdened our children with so many presents that 
they could not enjoy any of them. This was when our 
neighbor, attracted by the bright light of our Christmas 
tree, stood outside of the window and observed all that 
was going on inside. The next morning he came in 
laughing and related how we celebrated our Christmas 
as seen by him through the window. 'Well,' said he, 'it 
was funny: John, you should have seen yourself ges- 
ticulating and in a loud voice saying, 'Say, children, 
why don't you sing? Why don't you dance? Why don't 
you jump? Don't you feel happy over the many pres- 
ents? Why, I felt a hundred times happier when I did 



118 John and Rose 

not get a hundredth part of what you have!' Yes, he 
often told this incident to others. So you see that 
wealth and abundance are not necessarily the attributes 
of happiness. 

"The question, Eose, that now bothers me is, will the 
council accept the gift? May it not regard the motive 
as an ulterior one, or the money tainted, unjustly ac- 
quired, for which I want to make atonement, or some- 
thing like that ? Mr. Carnegie has often offered to donate 
over one hundred times the amount I propose to offer, 
and it was rejected with scorn for these reasons. In 
the olden times no one looked into the mouth of a gift 
horse, but accepted it without question. But now we ■ 
are more discriminating. Charity is by some consid- 
ered abominable ; it is contended that the laws should be 
so constituted that charity would never need be offered 
or accepted. 

"Yes, Eose, to remove all these objections and suspi- 
cions the best way will be to frankly state how honestly 
I acquired the money, and the motive why I give it, 
and then it will require delicate diplomacy to bring it 
before the council so it will not be rejected with scorn. 

"I remember when a little boy a neighbor who hap- 
pened to be with my parents offered to give me some 
sweets as a present, but I scornfully rejected them, 
saying I would not accept charity. I was reprimanded 
by mj^ parents for my stubbornness, but nevertheless 
could not be prevailed upon to accept. This was boyish 
stubbornness which I hope the older men have out- 
grown. ' ' 

Eose asked, "Will you appear before the council and 
hand them the $1,000 ? " 



Insurance Policy Matures 119 

' ' Oh, no, 1 will send it a communication couched in the 
most delicate diplomatic language I am able to formu- 
late. Rose, how would this do? 
" 'To the Honorable Mayor and Board of Aldermen: 

" 'Twenty years ago I took out my first 20-year en- 
do'vvTnent life insurance policy, and made a vow that 
in case I should live and be in good health and circum- 
stances when it became due, I would give it to charity. 

" 'This policy has now become due and the amount 
paid, and as a faint expression of gratitude for the kind 
favors fate has bestowed upon me for these many years, 
I therefore donate the $1,000 to the city, to be set aside 
and known as The Christmas Fund, the interest of which 
is to be used for Christmas presents to be distributed by 
the committee on poor to the poor children on every 
Christmas day. 

" 'Gentlemen, you need not thank me for this dona- 
tion, as I will derive more pleasure by giving it than you 
will by accepting it. Therefore you will oblige and do 
me a great favor by accepting it, for which I thank you 
in advance. 

" 'Yours most truly,' 

' ' How does this strike you. Rose ? ' ' 

"Well, it strikes mei that they will find the money 
clean; as you have scraped the taint from it for these 
twenty years, they could find no fault on this score. As 
to the motive, this, too, you explain frankly as being 
a selfish one which they will accept in the spirit you 
have explained. ' ' 

"For goodness sake, Rose, how can you find a selfish 
motive? Where is it?" 

"Why, don't you say that you expect to derive more 



120 John and Rose 

pleasure by giving the $1,000 than they will by accept- 
ing it? So you see you expect to be rewarded by the 
pleasure it may give you, which may be worth more to 
you than the expectation of getting back four times the 
dollars you have given. But let this not disappoint you. 
We all are actuated by selfish motives, only differing in 
degrees. For instance : 

"The first degree is when you give, say, $1,000, and 
expect a return in more dollars than you give. 

' ' The second degree is when you give with the expec- 
tation that the amount you give will be a good invest- 
ment in any event. 

''The third degree when given with no mercenary in- 
terest but to have it heralded about, which tickles vanity, 
worth more to many than the dollars given. 

"The fourth degree when given only with the hope 
that it will make others feel happy, and by it you, too, feel 
happy, the realization of which will be accepted as full 
value received for the dollars expended. 

"So you see that all given to charitj^ is more or less 
actuated by the expectation of a reward of some kind. 
This last degree you come under, and although there is 
a selfish motive in it, it is the least objectionable mankind 
is actuated by, and if all our selfishness would be in the 
fourth degree it would elevate the human race. No, I 
don't see how they could find a flaw in your motive." 

"Then, Rose, there is nothing objectionable in my peti- 
tion by which they might find an excuse for rejecting 
the donation, is there?" 

"Yes, there is," said Rose. "They might object to 
the string you attach to it. You impose on the commit- 



Insurance Policy Matures 121 

tee a perpetual duty, to be performed even after your 
spirit has departed. This they may regard as arrogant 
on your part. It will depreciate the motive and the 
value of the gift, and they may find this of sufficient ex- 
cuse to reject your donation. In order to give them 
the least justification in doing this, I would suggest 
that you strike out this part and loosen the string. ' ' 

"Oh, my," said John. "This is just the main part 
I set my heart on it should contain. But of course I see 
your point, and must eliminate anything which might 
or could be construed as offensive. Say, Rose, how 
would it bei to add after the words 'every Christmas 
day' 'or to any other charity the committee may see fit' ? 
By this the string is loosened, and the committee would 
not feel so much under compulsion, left free to act as 
it chooses, and yet would be more inclined to carry out 
my wish, as indicated above, how the fund should be 
expended. And after I am dead I don't care what 
they do." 

"John, John, there you are! You unconsciously ex- 
pose your selfishness. You had better strike this out, 
too." 

"How can I be selfish after I am dead?" 

' ' Of course not, but you are not dead and may not be 
for many years yet. You say as much as ' I — I want this 
done for my own pleasure as long as I live and can enjoy 
it; after I am dead and can't enjoy it any more I don't 
care if others can't.' Don't you see that by this you 
wiU be selfish in the first degree? Don't persuade your- 
self that by your $1,000 gift your character will receive 
the stamp of unselfish benevolence. The hope of making 



122 John and Rose 

others happy ought to be a sufficient reward, and the 
realization of it will be double compensation for your 
outlay. ' ' 

"Eose, how long have you retained your fine dis- 
criminating reasoning power acquired in the school of 
woman suffrage? I always thought that nothing was 
easier than to give a thing away, but I find that it is 
not easy to give wisely. Well, this ends it ; I shall give 
the paper and the donation to the city clerk and don't 
doubt it will be accepted." 

And so it was, with thanks. 



CHAPTER XX. 

End of First Year's Operations on the Farm. Inventory and 
Trial Balance at Its Close 

THE first year of farm life and operation drew to a 
close, and being a new venture, in which they had 
had no experience, they naturally felt anxious to know 
the result, especially as they intended to remain on the 
farm until the end of their lives. 

A favorable showing would portend a peaceful mind, 
while an unfavorable one would cause worry for the 
future. John prepared to take the first year's inventory 
of the operation of the Eosedale Farm. From the start 
he was nervous and fearful of what the final outcome 
might be. Before he tabulated the inventory in regular 
form he estimated the present value of all the property 
of the farm, added the purchases made during the year, 
and subtracted all losses and depreciations from the 
first inventory. 

He assumed that the land was of the same value ; that 
the buildings had been kept in good repair, and there- 
fore had no depreciation, but an addition to the stable 
costing $50 had been made; hence the farm and build- 
ing account was increased to $8,550. 

The horses were estimated to be worth $30 less than 
at the beginning of the year. The twelve cows he esti- 
mated to be worth $3 less each, or $36 in all ; but as there 
were added three calves worth $36, the live stock account 
was but $30 less, leaving it at $1,020. 

On the vehicle account he estimated a depreciation of 
123 



124 John and Rose 

five per cent, or $11.50, which would reduce the $230 at 
the beginning of the first year to $218,50. 

On the implements he estimated a depreciation of 8 
per cent, $17.60, which reduced the $220 to $202.40; but 
as a sulky plow had been added costing $45, that account 
showed $247.40. 

After this was done he looked up the first inventory, 
used it as a guide, and then proceeded to tabulate and 
transcribe a complete inventory in conformity with and 
in the same order as the first. The following is the 



INVENTORY AT THE END OP THE FIRST YEAR 

Rosedale Farm & Buildings $ 8,550.00 

3 horses @ $140 $420.00 

12 cows @ $47 564.00 

3 calves @ $12 36.00 

Live Stock Total $ 1,020.00 

1 wagon $ 47.50 

1 buggy 95.00 

1 sleigh 28.50 

2 harnesses 47.50 

Vehicle Total $ 218.50 

1 plough $ 13.80 

1 harrow 9.20 

1 binder 73.60 

1 mower 27.60 

1 reaper 36.80 

1 hayrake 18.40 

Sundry tools 23.00 

1 sulky plow 45.00 

Implements Total $ 247.40 



End of First Year on Farm 125 

Hay, 5 tons, @ $8.00 $ 40.00 

Oats, 80 bu., @ 40c 32.00 

Barley, 20 bu., @ 60c 12.00 

Corn, 65 bu., @ 50c 32.50 

Grain Total $ 116.50 

Cash in savings bank, farm acet $ 250.00 



End of first year total assets $10,402.40 

Beginning first year total assets 10,000.00 

Net profit first year $ 402.40 

For the grain and the savings bank new accounts were 
opened, as he did not have these accounts last year. 
Assuming that the four per cent interest on the $8,500 
mortgage and four per cent on John's and Rose's $1,500 
equity in the farm had been paid, and that no other 
liabilities were created ; and, on the other hand, if noth- 
ing had been diverted for other purposes from the 
farm's income or property — in that case the farm had 
earned four per cent on the investment, being $400 and 
$402.40 besides, in all $802.40 ; and in addition had paid 
the household expenses, which were assumed to be equal 
in value to the labor performed by the family. 

To prove the correctness of the farm's net earnings 
of $402.40, he had his bank book balanced, gathered all 
the checks he had drawn during the year, which showed 
what they were issued for, and got back all deposit slips, 
showing the money deposited and from what source, and 
further consulted his petty cash book in which he had 
entered all cash disbursements and receipts. From 



126 John and Rose 

these records he compiled and determined the different 
expenses and incomes, from what the profits had been 
derived, and how close the net earnings agreed with the 
inventory balance. The following was the result of 
these tabulations : 



END OF FIRST YEAR 

Disbursements. 

Interest, 4 per cent on $10,000 $ 400.00 

Paid outsidelabor 100.00 

Paid for seeds 100.00 

Paid taxes and insurance 100.00 

Household expenses accounted for 500.00 

Household expenses not accounted for 17.60 

Net gain as per inventory 402.40 



$1,620.00 



Receipts. 

Received for milk $ 500.00 

800 bu. barley @ 50c 400.00 

400 bu. rye @ 60c 240.00 

600 bu. potatoes @ 50e 300.00 

300 bu. oats @ 40c 120.00 

Vegetables 60.00 



$1,620.00 



Net gain down $ 402.40 



End op First Year on Farm 127 

All the above items were found either in the bank or 
in his petty cash book, excepting $17.60, which pre- 
sumably was paid out for small items not entered, with 
which the balance had to be forced. Of this gain John 's 
three-fifths interest was entitled to $241.44, and Rose's 
two-fifths to $160.96. But as the farm had only $250 
available in the savings bank, they would divide this 
and leave a balance of $152.40 as the farm's surplus. 
They need not do this, and could let the whole $402.40 
stand as a surplus if it were not for (as they treat it) 
their sacred investment fund, which they have nursed 
for many years, by John adding each year $200 and Rose 
$100 out of their savings. They would not abandon it 
or imperil its growth, which had been so satisfactory. 

Rose's two-fifths of the $250 in the bank was $100, 
just the annual investment fund dues, and John's three- 
fifths $150, which took $50 more to pay his $200 dues. 
This he made up by taking it out of his bank credit. 

The farm's savings bank account was now balanced, 
the investment fund additions invested by the Trustee 
Company, and then their first year's operations turned 
out to their entire satisfaction; so much so that they 
entered upon the new year with far more confidence and 
with less perturbation than they had upon the year 
that had passed. They felt blest, and to express their 
thankfulness Rose suggested that they invite their neigh- 
bors in to celebrate their second birthday on the farm, 
to which John heartily assented, and invitations were 
issued. 

After all the accounts had been posted in the ledger 
the balances at the beginning of the second year were as 
follows : 



128 John and Rose 

trial balance beginning second year 

Assets. Page Dr. 

Rosedale farm and buildings 1 $ 8,550.00 

Live stock 2 1,020.00 

Vehicles 3 218.50 

Implements and machinery 4 247.40 

Grain, new account 8 116.50 

Total assets $10,152.40 

Liabilities. Page Cr. 

Mortgage debt 5 $ 8,500.00 

John's 3/5 equity 6 900.00 

Rose's 2/5 equity 7 600.00 

Surplus, new account 9 152.40 

Total liabilities $10,152.40 



CHAPTER XXI. 

The First Farm Party. General Discussion on Topics of the Day 

THE time for the party had arrived ; the guests were 
prompt, and it pleased John and Rose that none 
of those invited had sent regrets. As usual the conversa- 
tion at first was on the weather, on crops, and what per- 
tained to farming; then the good roads movement was 
discussed and generally approved. Mr. Ah el thought that 
the agitation for better roads by the city chaps must be 
attributed to the advent of the automobile, alleging that 
the motive for the agitation might be considered selfish, 
but nevertheless it was commendable, as the farmers 
would share in such improvement. Mr. James agreed 
to this ; then he drifted into another topic, the universal 
lamentation against the high cost of living, especially 
the high prices for farm produce. The cry was heard 
around the country, ''Back to the Farm! Back to the 
Farm!" and the most ridiculous phase of it was that 
the theorists and politicians are the loudest in 
their denunciations and recommendations. They turn 
agricultural experts; they try to teach farmers how to 
adopt scientific farming, alleging that they could there- 
by raise double the crops that they now do. 

Mr. Practical interrupted to say: "The oft repeated 
assertion that if our farmers were taught scientific farm- 
ing and applied it they could raise two bushels where 
they now raise one, is chimerical. I can do that, perhaps 
not scientifically, but with manure, and plenty of it, and 
129 



130 . John and Rose 

with more sweat of my brow. Then the question arises, 
what have I gained? "Would not the extra labor and 
fertilizer cost as much or more than the extra bushel 
gained thereby ? Another thing : wheat is now only 85 
cents a bushel, and other grains are as low in proportion, 
at which prices it does not pay to raise them, for there 
is already an over-production. 

"Now let us scientifically double the crop; where 
would the price go then? We might get less for two 
bushels than for one now. I do not deny that scientific 
farming gives larger crops, but most farmers are doing 
it now without university training, using only their own 
home training and experience. 

' ' The best and most beneficent and inexpensive train- 
ing we farmers have had was and is by the Farmers 
Institutes held each year in our counties. For this we 
owe ex-Governor W. D. Hoard, Hon. Estabrook, C. M. 
Morrison, Hiram Smith, Geo. McKerrow, etc., our sincere 
thanks. If it had not been for them our farms would not 
be worth half what they are now. 

"Many farmers are now sending their boys to the 
Agricultural School at the University, in the hope that 
thereby they will be enabled to operate the farm to better 
advantage, and the boys become more interested and at- 
tracted to farm life. If this is their expectation, it is a 
mistake, because when the boys mingle with what is con- 
sidered a higher class, and richer students, under such 
influence they will come to look upon the farmer's voca- 
tion as degrading, and will never go back to the farm if 
any opportunity is offered them in a city; and if they 
must go back, they do it grudgingly and discontentedly. 

' ' I tell you this agricultural course in our universities 



The First Farm Party 131 

is spoiling the boys as farmers. I have all along thought 
that instead we ought to have one agricultural school in 
each county to which all farm experimental bulletins 
should be sent. — Then all students would be on the same 
footing, and the surroundings and associations would not 
influence them away from the farm. And then, too, it 
would be less expensive. 

"Of course, if the parents should want to send their 
boys to a university to give them an opportunity to find 
out for what vocation they are best fitted, that is another 
question. As to the continous advice to the farmer by 
Dick, Tom and Harry, it is laughable." 

John chimed in, "And this is not all. The bankers 
from their gorgeous offices issue pamphlets, send them 
broadcast, lecture in conventions, and appropriate 
thousands of dollars for the uplift of the farmer. They 
are so solicitous for the farmers' welfare, and so ab- 
sorbed in this educational campaign, of which they know 
little, that they have no time or inclination to reform 
their own banking methods, of which they should know 
most. They all agree that our banking system is faulty, 
in that it throws the country periodically into panics, 
owing to the laxity of our banking laws. This can be 
remedied only by compelling the banks to insure their 
depositors the same as their bank notes, which could 
easily be done. Such legislation would stop financial 
disturbances. ' ' 

Mr. Lang thought that this was easily explained. The 
banker wants the farmer to be prosperous. He knows 
that if he is successful, everybody will share in his pros- 
perity. The banker believes he can educate the farmer 
to double his crops with but little added expense, 
from which, of course, he figures that the farmer 



132 John and Rose 

would have twice the money to deposit. This explains 
the bankers' solicitude for the farmer. 

Mr. Sontag thought that is one of the motives, but he 
gave his version of another motive which prompted the 
"back to the farm" cry. This is caused, he said, by 
the fear the cit}' man has of the keen competition which 
the strong, j^oung farmer boys could give them if they 
were allowed to intrude in their lucrative fields; but if 
they could be kept on the farm, it would bring about 
keener farm competition which might reduce the price 
of farm products, just what the city people are striv- 
ing for. 

Mr, Lure smiled when relating the enticing arguments 
used to stem the tide of young men leaving the farm. 
Farm life is pictured as ideal, beautiful and healthful. 
It is so independent that no one can understand why 
anyone should want to leave it, and prefer to live in the 
dirty, smoky, crowded, unhealthy, demoralizing atmos- 
phere of a city. But in spite of all these alluring repre- 
sentations, city life will always remain attractive to the 
young. 

Mr. Doubter said he didn't know about this. Of 
course in his younger days there were more reasons for 
wanting to get away from the farm. Farm life then 
was a drudge, and with the then prevailing low prices 
for farm produce, the income was not commensurate 
with the labor performed. But in later years this has 
changed for the better. Now he gets about what is due 
him, which in earlier years was denied him. The farmer 
has now far more conveniences, more machinery to 
lighten his labor, and lives a life more equal to those 



The First Farm Party I33 

dwelling in a city. Yet the surplus population still 
naturally drifts cityward. 

Mr. Trade told of a court proceeding which might 
tempt the young men from the farm. It was a case iu_ 
which a commission house was sued to pay back margins 
money which a customer had paid and lost on a wheat 
deal. Among the questions asked by the lawyer for the 
farmer of the commission man was: ''How many times 
have you bought and sold wheat for your client ? " He 
answered, "Oh, many times." Then the lawyer com- 
mented, ' ' So you can sell the whole crop of a farm over 
and over again while comfortably sitting in your office 
chair?" 

"Yes, a hundred times." 

"And you don't raise a bucketful yourself?" 

"No." 

The lawyer sarcastically commented, ' ' You fellows are 
the drones of the earth. While the farmer can raise and 
sell but one crop of grain a year, you fellows can sell his 
crop a hundred times, while sitting in your office 
chairs ! ' ' 

Rose had been entertaining her friends, but when she 
heard ' ' commission merchant ' ' she had a story to tell. 

"John," she said, "you remember when our mutual 
friend Mrs. Knell was visiting us, and told us how a 
commission merchant, Mr. Felz, had made a fortune on 
the Board of Trade by speculating in wheat ; that he had 
bought his wife a palatial residence, and had furnished 
it in royal style out of the profits of his wheat deals." 

"Yes, I remember," said John; "that was about five 
years ago. But Mrs. KJuell also added that she had told 



134 John and Kose 

her husband that he ought to follow Mr. Felz 's example ; 
that he had been on the' Board of Trade for a much 
longer time, but had allowed many splendid opportuni- 
ties to slip by. She spoke of her husband as if he were 
an incompetent and an ignoramus. I shall never forget 
it. But did she tell you the final outcome 1 ' ' 

"No." 

''I thought not. One speculative success is recounted 
a thousand times, while a thousand speculative failures 
are never told. I will give you the other side of the 
story, and tell you how it ended, as told by Mr. Knell 
himself. 

"After Mrs. Felz had painted speculation in glowing 
colors to Mr. Knell's wife, the latter asked her husband 
why he did not speculate. She chided him, and told 
him he had no sand. She wanted him to speculate a 
little at first, and then grow up with it. To this sugges- 
tion he dissented. He had seen many people wrecked in 
the whirlpool of speculation, and he strove to keep clear 
of it. But he said to his wife that if she knew the game 
better than he did he would give her $500 with which 
she might try her luck. But he wanted her to under- 
stand that $500 was the limit; he would give her no 
more, and if she lost it that must end her speculation. 
He told her that when she wanted to buy or sell he would 
do just as she said, and that he would not charge her a 
commission. His wife from then on acquired the habit 
of a broker. The first thing that attracted her attention 
was the market reports. She would often ask whether 
or not wheat was very low, and if it was, it surely must 
go up again. He would tell her that he was no prophet. 
She would keep firing the same question at him, re- 



The First Farm Party 135 

peating it over and over again, and Ms answer would 
always be 'li don't know.' Then she would urge the 
proposition that if wheat prices were at a low ebb didn't 
it stand to reason that they must go up ? But Mr. Knell 
would still maintain that he didn't know. She would 
then get irritable, and taunt him by telling him that if 
he knew anything at all he would have had a house like 
Mr. Felz's long ago. 

"She then said to him, 'Since you are so stupid and 
don 't seem to know, at least I know ; therefore you buy 
for me ten thousand bushels of wheat at 85 cents a 
bushel. Here is the five cent a bushel margin, in all 
$500. ' This he said he did, and as luck would have it, 
wheat rose from day to day, over which the wife was 
exultant. When it had advanced one cent a bushel she 
still thought' that it would go higher, and she asked 
KJuell what his opinion was. He had nothing to say. A 
few days afterward wheat rose another cent a 
bushel. Then she asked him whether or not it was op- 
portune to sell. Again he didn't know. 'Well,' she 
said, 'I don't care whether you know or not. I do, and 
I order you to sell and close the deal. ' He did this and 
brought home to his wife a $700 check in which 
was included her $500 margin. 'Aha!' she exclaimed, 
overcome with joy, 'this is the way to do business. I, 
know how to do it and you don 't. ' As the market was 
unsettled she could not make up her mind what to 
do, but would wait developments. She had long been 
contemplating the purchase of a new set of furniture, 
ever since she saw that splendid set of Mrs. Felz 's ; but 
as she wanted to keep the $500 for margin she would 
buy only $200 worth at first. 



136 John and Rose 

"Wheat was still climbing upward. When she sold it, 
it was 87, but had now reached 92 cents. If she had only 
waited a little longer she would have made $500 more. 
From that price it fluctuated slightly up and down. She 
believed it had reached the highest point and would go 
down. Everything does after reaching a high point. 
'Don't you think so?' she asked her husband. 'Oh, I 
need not ask you, as you say you know nothing. I am 
sure it must go down. Now sell for me 10,000 bushels 
of wheat at 96 on a 5-cents-a-bushel margin.' This he 
did ; but instead of going down, wheat still went higher. 
Mr. Knell was forced to keep up the 5 cent margins and 
pay it out of his own pocket, or otherwise have her deal 
sold out. He told her about this, which made her ner- 
vous. For a whole month wheat rose and fell at times 
to such a price that if he had not kept up the margin her 
wheat would have been sold and she would have lost all 
of her $500 margins and what he had put in, besides. 
All this time she was kept in a state of hysteria, only 
awaiting, the time when she could close out the deal with- 
out loss. When that time finally arrived she did not ask 
him what he did not know, but ordered him to close the 
deal, out of which she barely got back her $500 margins. 
As she had bad luck speculating on a declining market 
she again returned to speculate on a rising market, by 
which she profited on her first deal, and awaited her op- 
portunity. This she thought had arrived when wheat 
was down to 90 cents, when she again had bought for her 
10,000 bushels. From that price it went up and down, 
and in about a week it touched 93 cents. She quickly 
ordered her wheat sold. She could not bear the nervous 



The First Farm Party I37 

strain for a month as she did in the last deal. This gave 
her a profit of $300, on which she rested her oars for a 
time. She bought the rest of the furniture for that 
amount. At this stage she cleared in all $500 with 
which she had bought furniture, and had $500 left, which 
her husband had given her as margin money. 

"But let me condense the story. She, continued to 
speculate, and in the course of a few months gained and 
lost, but lost more than she gained, till not only the $500 
margin money was gone, but double as much more which 
Mr. Knell had put up as margins. Mr. Kjiell told me 
that his dear wife cried like a baby ; but it restored her 
respect for him, which was worth more than the loss, 
though it cost him more than $1,000. Mr. Felz, whose 
success had led to Knell's wife's speculative fever, went 
into bankruptcy. Mr. Knell said his wife could not get 
over her complete failure. He tried to console her by 
reminding her that she got a complete new set of furni- 
ture out of her speculations, which she would not have 
had otherwise. Well, Eose, this is the story which Mr. 
Knell told me about his wife's wheat speculations, and 
you will admit that it was as bad as stock speculation. 

"When he told me all this I was reminded of what 
a miller told me about the business capacity of his son, 
who had told him how much money the boys were mak- 
ing by peddling apples. The father asked his son 
whether he would like to try it. Of course he would. 
' How much capital does it require ? ' asked the father. 

' ' ' Oh, for a peck about 25 cents, ' the boy replied. 

"The father gave him the money and he started in 
business. When he returned his father asked how he got 
along. 



138 John and Rose 

' ' ' Tip-top, ' replied the offspring, ' I sold them all and 
made twenty cents. ' 

" 'Why, that is encouraging; now j^ou have forty-five 
cents, ' said the father. 

" 'No,' the boy answered, 'I have only twenty cents.' 

" 'But I thought you cleared twenty cents!' the 
father exclaimed. 

' ' ' Yes, I did. I had nothing when I started, ' was the 
boy 's retort. ' ' 

Mr. Candid, who had listened with great interest to 
these narrations, could not suppress his feelings, and at 
times gave vent to a hearty laugh, which drew the at- 
tention of the guests to him. They asked him what was 
the matter. He remarked that the story so precisely 
fitted an experience of his own, that at times he believed 
he was the principal of it, and that it was a dig at him, 
with another name substituted to save him from em- 
barrassment. The guests were so interested that they 
insisted that he must tell his speculative ventures. 

"Well, I suppose I must. 

"Some years ago I read how much easy money could 
be made on the Board of Trade ; that while an honest 
farmer could sell but one crop a year, a broker on the 
Board of Trade could sell it many times, as Mr. Trade 
had said. I had quite a talk about this with a com- 
mission merchant, who by his bull and bear explana- 
tions and other secrets of the trade with which he con- 
fidentially initiated me, so impressed me that I began to 
believe the farmer is a dunce, because he simply by hard 
work raises the crop and sells it but once, and allows the 
commission merchant, with no labor, to sell it many 
times over. Anybody can sell the real goods, but 



The First Farm Party I39 

it takes a genius to sell what he does not have. That is 
a trick most of us do not have the capacity of perform- 
ing. However, I would try it. The commission mer- 
chant advised me to try a little at first, to learn the 
ropes. 

"So I did. I gained and lost and lost and gained, and 
when John told ahout Mrs. Knell becoming so hysterical 
and nervous that she could not bear the load any longer, 
I could not restrain my feelings, as I had to go through 
the same torture. But I learned the ropes. I hung 
onto them, trying to regain what I had lost. To be 
prepared in case ruin should stare me in the face, I was 
learning how to put the ropes around my neck. How- 
ever, I dropped the ropes before it was too late, and 
never after attempted to recover what I had lost in try- 
ing to learn the ropes in that or any other speculative 
venture." 

John, noticing that this topic appeared to interest his 
guests most, asked Mr. Lange, who sat close to him, if 
he could not tell of like ventures; to which Mr. Lange 
answered, "No." Then Mr. Lange asked John if he 
ever had any experience in that line. John having told 
his so often that the fear of exposing his stupidity had 
worn off, frankly admitted that he was roped in for $200 
in mining stock, on which he was promised a 20 per cent 
dividend, but never received a cent. He lost all. This 
was not so bad, but it kept him worrying lest he would 
be assessed in addition to his loss. 

"Well, gentlemen," said John, "let me tell you. Few 
believe how much money these brokers and promoters 
draw from the people ; and not, as many suppose, from 
the farmers mostly, but from the professional men, men 



140 John and Eose 

who are presumed to be the best informed, yet the pro- 
moters find that class the easiest marks to work on. 

"This I believe must be attributed to their lack of 
business experience, and to their belief that all business 
enterprises pay, or why would anyone go into them? 
Another reason is because they have no business of their 
own to invest their surplus in, and those in their neigh- 
borhood, in which they could invest, offer but a meager 
rate of interest in comparison to the attractive bait the 
persuasive promoter is continually and persistently 
dangling before their eyes. 

"From all I have gathered I feel sure that in our 
county alone, hundreds of thousands of dollars have 
been drawn out by these speculations, yes, and lost; 
completely thrown away. If this money had been in- 
vested in home enterprises we would have four times as 
many factories here as we now have, and these invest- 
ments might have proven very profitable. In no case 
could they have proven as disastrous as they have been. 

"If anyone approaches you with an investment with 
a promise of from 6 to 8 per cent interest, pay no atten- 
tion to it, unless you know the inside of it, or you like 
the gambling element in it. As a general rule, the safety 
of an investment is measured by the rate of interest it 
bears. 

"I have often wondered why there have not been 
organized insurance companies, insuring all kinds of 
credits and investments. Everything under the sun is 
insurable on the general average principle at a certain 
rate of premium commensurate to the risk. Insurance 
companies now insure merchants against loss in their 
book accounts; insure cities and states against loss by 



The First Farm Party 141 

their officers at I/4 per cent premium a year and less. In 
some states deposits in banks are insured against loss, 
and it will not be long before all investments can be in- 
sured. This will be a great relief to all the people. ' ' 

John having exhausted his subject, called on Mr. 
Caution to give the guests the benefit of his many years ' 
experience in speculations, but he kept mum. A painful 
silence hung over the guests. John ventured the asser- 
tion that more than one-half the guests at some time or 
other had had speculative experiences. There was no 
response. He became more aggressive and challenged 
all the guests to a bet, ten to one, that there were not 
five in the room who had not lost by speculation. There 
were no takers. He became bolder, and offered any- 
one who would state and show how much he was ahead 
in his speculations, ten per cent on such gains. Again 
no takers. He got more courage and added, "I will 
include the ladies," but all remained silent. The com- 
pany thought that John's triumph might embolden him 
to such an extent that he would call on one after an- 
other, and persist that they make answer; and as this 
would be embarrassing to many, they consulted their 
watches and reminded their wives that it was time ta go 
home. John thus unintentionally and regretfully broke 
up the party. 

After the guests were gone Rose reprimanded John 
for his arrogant behavior. She said, "We had such a 
congenial party, and that you spoiled it toward the end 
is a pity. ' ' 

John admitted he was to blame. Whenever he was 
allowed to dwell too long on a subject he became so ab- 
sorbed in it that it ran away with him. He had realized 



142 John and Rose 

this as soon as he saw the guests grabbing their watches, 
but then it was too late to remedy it. The harm is done. 
"We cannot undo it, so let us console ourselves that soon 
all will be forgotten. 



CHAPTER XXII. 

Second Year on the Farm. Inventory and Trial Balance. Cannot Agree 
on a Second Party 

ANOTHER year had rolled away, and John took an 
inventory to determine the result of the second 
year's operation on the farm. He turned to his last 
year 's inventory, and as the farm and buildings had had 
no change he left the value at $8,550.00. To the live 
stock he added three cows, costing $150.00, two pigs 
costing $20.00. He lost one cow. He estimated the three 
horses at $135.00 each, a total value of $405.00 ; the 11 
cows at $44.00 each, a total of $484.00, the three heifers 
at $30.00 each or $90.00. To the; vehicle account he 
added one wagon, costing $60.00, and depreciated 5 per. 
cent from, last year's inventory. The implements re- 
mained the same, but from this account he deducted 
from last year's inventory 8 per cent depreciation. He 
then weighed and estimated the grain on hand and com- 
puted the cash in the bank. After all that was done he 
proceeded to tabulate and transcribe as follows : 



INVENTORY END OP SECOND YEAR 

Rosedale farm and buildings $ 8,550.00 

3 horses @ $135 $405.00 

11 cows @ $44 484.00 

3 cows @ $50 150.00 

3 heifers @ $30 90.00 

2 pigs @ $10 20.00 

Live stock account $ 1,149.00 

143 



144 John and Eose 

1 wagon $ 45.13 

1 buggy 90.25 

1 sleigh 27.07 

2 harnesses 45.12 

1 new wagon 60.00 

Vehicle aeeoimt $ 267.57 

1 plow $ 12.70 

1 harrow 8.48 

1 binder 67.72 

1 mower 25.40 

1 reaper 33.85 

1 hayrack 16.93 

Sds. tools 21.16 

1 sulky plow 41.40 

Implement account $ 227.64 

Hay, 6 tons @ $7.00 $ 42.00 

Oats, 70 bu. @ 40c 28.00 

Barley, 40 bu. @ 50c 20.00 

Corn, 70 bu. @ 40c 28.00 

Potatoes, 30 bu. @ 30c 9.00 

Grain account $ 127.00 

In savings bank, farm account 375.00 

End of 2nd year— total assets $10,696.21 

Beginning of 2nd year — total assets 10,152.40 

Net profit 2nd year $ 543.81 

"With the aid of the bank book and his cash book John 
proceeded to compare the inventory with the operating 
disbursements and receipts as he had done a year be- 
fore, with the following result: 



Second Year on the Farm 145 

end of second year 

Disbursements. 

Int. on $10,000 @ 4% $ 400.00 



and insurance 100.00 

Labor outside 220.00 

Family exp. accounted for . 530.00 

Sunds to bal. not accounted 36.19 

Net profit 2nd year $ 543.81 

$1,830.00 
Receipts. 

Milk .$ 700.00 

900 bu. barley @ 55c 495.00 

200 bu. rye @ 60c 120.00 

60 tons of beets @ $5. 300.00 

400 bu. potatoes @ 30c 120.00 

Vegetables 65.00 

Fruits 30.00 



$1830.00 
Net gain on farm. $ 543.81 

With the $36.19 sundries above, which was the dis- 
crepancy with the inventory, presumably paid out for 
small items, the balance was forced and agreed with the 
inventory. 

From this second year's gain of $543.81 they took as 
a dividend $375.00 deposited in savings bank and added 
the balance of $168.81 to last year's surplus. Of the 
$375.00 John's 3/5 share was $225.00 and Eose's 2/5 
share $150.00. Out of this John had the Trustee 



146 John and Rose 

Company invest $200.00 of his dividends, and Rose had 
Ji5lOO of her share, which was added to their investment 
funds. 

John's remaining balance of $25.00, and Rose's 
$50.00 they have the savings bank credit to their private 
accounts. By this the farm's bank account was balanced. 

After the accounts were posted in the ledger they 
showed the following balance at the beginning of the 
third year : 



TRIAL BALANCE BEGINNING THIRD YEAR 

Assets. Page 

Farm and buildings 1 $ 8,550.00 

Live stock 2 1,149.00 

Vehicles 3 267.57 

Implements ' 4 227.64 

Grain 8 127.00 

$10,321.21 
Liabilities. Page 

Mortgage debt 5 $ 8,500.00 

John's 3/5 int 6 900.00 

Rose's 2/5 int 7 600.00 

Surplus 9 321.21 



$10,321.21 



The bookkeeping will not hereafter be exhibited. It 
is assumed that the farm accounts, John's and Rose's 
private accounts, and the investment funds will be con- 
tinued as before. 



Second Yeae on the Fabm 147 

John could have kept more detailed farm accounts, as 
is sometimes done on larger farms. For instance, he 
could have kept account of expense and income of each 
particular product, such as live stock, grain, dairy, etc., 
which would show precisely what would pay best. This 
he may have done, but if so it is not exhibited here. 

The second year's operation of the farm had proven 
more favorable than the first, and naturally they felt 
contented. John was so pleased over it that he asked 
Eose how it would do to arrange for another party. She 
was surprised. "Do you suppose anybody will at- 
tend?" 

"Why not?" he replied. "At our last party did they 
not have a good time?" "Yes," Eose replied, "they 
did until I served the dessert on which you spread so 
much pepper and salt by your arrogant talk, that no one 
would touch it, and left it in disgust. No, I don't think 
they will subject themselves to such insults again." 

"Dessert? Why, they must have felt gratified that I 
spiced it and made it so unpalatable. If I had not, and 
they had devoured it, it would surely have spoiled their 
stomachs, and some might have become sick, and even 
died. Think of such a calamity! I could have been 
held responsible and have been sued for damages. No. 
My spoiling the dessert was a blessing. ' ' 

"You seem," said Eose, "to have found an easy ex- 
cuse for your rude behavior at our last year's party. 
You really turn it into benevolence. Do you believe a 
little dessert, cake or pie would do any harm ? ' ' 

"No, not in itself, if it were not that it is eaten 
after you are satiated and then crammed down, after 
your stomach is already full. This brings the harm. 



148 John and Rose 

The innocent pie is continually proclaimed as injurious 
to health. This wrong impression has been formed be- 
cause it is generally eaten, not because you have an 
appetite for it, but because it is a dessert, which not to 
eat would show a lack of manners or a breach of eti- 
quette. What are the contents of pie anyway? They 
are flour, fruit, and lard or butter, just the right kind 
of mixture to make it healthful! How often. Rose, did 
we have our little quarrels when I wanted to eat my 
dessert first, and you grabbed it away from me. If all 
desserts were served first at meals, stomachs would not 
be loaded beyond their digestive powers, and a great 
general improvement in health would follow. Rose, you 
know I am no gambler nor bluffer. I will bet you $10 to 
$1 that if you consult the physicians in town they will 
confirm what I say, that well baked pie is healthful." 

' ' 0, pshaw, ' ' said Rose. ' ' I won 't bother about it. It 
seems you are always trying to turn the earth upside 
down. ' ' 

"Not at all. I am trying to turn the earth downside 
up. If we have another party would you relieve me of 
my responsibility by serving the dessert first?" 

' ' 1 guess not. How can you ask me to do such a foolish 
thing? Do you believe that because we are farmers, we 
are so independent that we can renounce the common 
rules of etiquette, and set up a new code of our own? 
Why, the papers, always on the lookout for the sen- 
sational, would at once grab at the opportunity we 
would offer them. They would picture our party, our 
dinner, as of the barbarian ages, and I as an ignora- 
mus, crank or what-not. 0, no, you cannot expect me 
to sacrifice myself for that, can you?" 



Second Year on the Farm 149 

"Sacrifice yourself? Gracious, no! You would im- 
mortalize yourself. You would be hailed as the savior 
of suffering humanity. The doctors would acclaim the 
innovation as the greatest health restorer of the age. 
All the papers, as you say, are on the alert for some- 
thing new and original, and they would at once herald 
it around the world, and picture you as the greatest 
benefactor. You might even get the idea patented." 

"What an odd fellow you must be! I don't believe 
there is a single person who will agree with your 
hypothesis. To put pie down as a healthful food is 
preposterous. During my whole life I have never heard 
a person who did not denounce it as a harmful food, 
and now you turn it around as a healthful food." 

"Yes, it is if you don't ram it down after you are 
already full. I am sure that if your entire meal con- 
sisted of pie you could not overeat and oppress your- 
self, and excite your stomach to rebellion. The trouble 
is our meals consist of too many courses, all of which 
must be tasted, stimulating the appetite. If all meals 
were limited to a single course we would not be subject 
to dyspepsia and other ailments as we now are. Simple 
life and meals are the cure. Rose, I have worked out a 
prescription for a menu — sane, inexpensive, delicious, 
simple and healthy. Would you do me the favor of pre- 
paring it, and dish it out to our guests ? I can give you 
the prescription." 

**I should say not. Do you suppose I need a doctor 
to prescribe my dinner? Our guests are not sick yet, 
and will not be after partaking of my menu. Can't 
you allow me to manage my own affairs ? It seems you 
have but little faith in my ability to manage my part 



o 

150 John and Rose 

of the household. I have a prescription, as you call it, 
for our dinner, if we are to have one. The last one we 
had was a back number. I found that out when I at- 
tended a party in the city. They had a dozen courses 
and four different kinds of dessert, all delicious, and 
flowers in profusion. I took note of this, and to some 
extent will have our next dinner like it. ' ' 

' ' Dinner ? Are we going to have a dinner 1 I thought 
it was to be a supper. ' ' 

' ' No, a dinner, like we had last year, ' ' said Eose. 

"A dinner?" John asked. "Why, last year we had 
a supper in the evening, didn 't we ? " 

"That again shows how much you are behind the 
times. A dinner is not a mid-day, but an evening meal. 
Your old time dinner is now called lunch. ' ' 

John asked since when was supper a dinner and din- 
ner a supper? He thought those terms designated the 
time when they were eaten, and had nothing in common, 
as to what kinds of meals were served. "For instance," 
he said, "breakfast is served in the morning, dinner at 
noon, supper in the evening. I suppose this is another 
fad of the upper class, so one can tell to what class one 
belongs. One who takes his dinner at supper time be- 
longs to the select upper class, while those who take their 
dinner at dinner time belong to the common herd, the 
lower class. You accuse me of trying to set everything 
upside down: you certainly can do it better. In my 
blessed ignorance, if one would invite me to dinner I 
would be on hand sharp at noon. Rose, before I forget 
it, if you should give a dinner at supper time don't in- 
vite the guests to dinner but to supper, as I fear that 
they may be as ignorant of the fads as I am ; otherwise 



Second Year on the Farm 151 

you will start our party far worse than I ended the din- 
ner last year." 

Kose said, "Don't bother yourself about this. I can 
manage it. John, you ought to have been at the city 
dinner I attended. Besides the food it furnished the 
stomach, it supplied food for the brain, sufficient to en- 
liven the conversation, which was kept up the entire eve- 
ning over the twelve courses and four desserts they had 
eaten. It was grand, magnificent. ' ' 

"You said," replied John, " 'the table was under a 
cloud of flowers.' How inconsistent with the hygienic 
teachings of to-day. How is it possible that this upper 
class who are so fearful of germs, bacteria, bugs and 
snakes will allow these flowers to unload their hidden 
germs and bugs on a dining table? I am not at all 
sensitive. I like flowers in their place, but please keep 
them away from our meals. I wondered, Rose, why 
you didn't tell me more about the magnificent dinner. 
Oh, I see. The day after you became so sick that you 
thought telling me about it would make you feel worse. 

"Now, Rose, I do wish you would do me the favor of 
preparing our party supper after my prescription." 

"Now, John, how can we? It would violate an old 
custom in vogue for a century. ' ' 

John asked, "Why don't you apply the century 
custom to your hats, as well, and your clothing ? These 
fashions or customs you change every month, and with- 
out any practical benefit, sometimes bringing on a tor- 
ture; inconvenient, unbecoming, real ugly, all owing to 
the fashion tyrant. Now Rose, do you mean to say that 
what used to be my dinner at noon is now my lunch, 
like I used to take standing before a saloon counter ? ' ' 



152 John and Rose 

"No, no. A lunch is taken at noon the same as you 
used to take your dinner; but it is not the main meal, 
only a slight repast. We had better postpone this discus- 
sion, and continue it some other day, when you are more 
agreeable. ' ' 



CHAPTEB XXIII. 

Second Party Postponed. Wrangle About Dessert and Social Etiquette 

" A LIGHT repast, is it? Well, of course I cannot 
±M. expect yon to serve a lunch, or repast, as you 
call it, but I think you could leave out the dessert with- 
out offending the guests, and oblige me. Say, Rose, I 
read a few days ago that our honorable Secretary of 
State at Washington knocked all your old table etiquette 
into a cocked hat. He had a hard time to get his wife 
to consent to it. She made the same objections you did. 
To overcome these, he told her that he would take all 
the responsibility for his new reform table etiquette, 
and explained to her how he would do it: After the 
guests were all seated at the table, and just before com- 
mencing to dine, he would arise, hold up his hand, and 
say, 'Ladies and Gentlemen: You will please excuse me 
for addressing you at the beginning of our dinner, which 
for ages has been allowed to be done only at its close. 
But we are now in a progressive age, have torn our- 
selves loose from the old moss-grown precedents, which 
too long have kept the human race in bondage. The 
very atmosphere is pregnant with new ideas as to re- 
forms, new laws, new customs, which, after the people 
have adopted them, will give them more equality, more 
prosperity, more contentment, more healthfulness. I 
need not longer dwell on these measures, as they will 
come one after another. At present I will speak of a 
reform which just now confronts us, our dinner. 
153 



154 John and Rose 

" 'I suggested to my wife that we would, as our first 
reform measure, cut out all wine and champagne from 
our table, to which she at first strenuously objected ; but 
after I gave her the reasons why, she consented. And 
these reasons are : All my ancestors, as far back as I can 
trace them, never allowed intoxicants at the table. 
Knowing that wine and champagne are most injurious 
to health, especially after a hearty meal, I always won- 
dered why this custom was so long allowed to undermine 
the health of mankind, and that in high places, which 
justified the people in following the example set by the 
upper class. 

" ' I often hoped that I would be placed in a position 
to remedy this, and as I am now, by the grace of the 
people, in this position, I shall not lose the opportunity. 
You understand that any new custom is soonest adopted 
by the people if inaugurated by or originated from a 
high source, and by persons in high places. 

" ' As our capital city, and our state dinner, offers the 
best opportunity to amend a long standing, pernicious 
evil, therefore I have eliminated from our dinner all 
intoxicants, which I hope will be adopted as a national 
custom. That after its general adoption the health of 
our people will be greatly improved, will be attested to 
by all our physicians. Being actuated by such benefi- 
cent motive, I know you mil not feel offended when, 
at the end of the dinner, you will not be served with the 
customary champagne, and I hope that you will enjoy 
yourselves better without than with it. 

" 'Now, ladies and gentlemen, please arise, and let us 
drink — gracious, no ! let us sigh — to the success of the 



Second Party Postponed 155 

new-born dinner and banquet custom. May it prove a 
blessing to our country, now and forever.' 

"Well, Eose, how effectively and smoothly the Secre- 
tary smashed the old custom without the least friction ! 
Why can't we follow suit?" 

"Follow suit! How often have you accused me of 
aping a century-old custom, as you term it, of serving 
dessert after a meal, and now you hasten to ape a secre- 
tary's fad, which is only a few weeks old, and which 
smashes fundamental customs. 

"This secretary must have had an abundance of im- 
pudence to address his guests in the way he did, and 
force on them his hobby. Do you think he could do 
this sober-minded? I can't see how he could without 
some stimulant. Do you know what I suspect? He 
drank all the champagne reserved for his guests, other- 
wise he could not have acted as he did." 

"Oh, no," said John, "he is a bold, courageous per- 
son, and when he is wrapped up in what appears to him 
a good cause, he is so stimulated by it that he needs no 
other, and fears nothing." 

"Say, John, I have not read that in the papers, what 
you just told me, but I did read half a dozen comments 
and criticisms and ridicules on his hobbies. The secre- 
tary will be greatly disappointed if he believes his hobby 
will be followed." 

"Ridiculed ! Why, every new fashion from Paris, when 
it first makes its appearance, throws the people into con- 
vulsions, and in less than a month the women fall over 
each other to be the first to adopt them. I am not op- 
posed to a fashion that is practical, convenient and be- 



156 John and Eose 

coming, but the continual change for the worse irritates 
me. The other day when in a street car there were 
about a dozen ladies whose hats were all of different 
shape and color, while the men's were nearly all alike. 
I had my eye on one conspicuously shaped lady's hat. 
The lady, noting that it had attracted my attention, 
asked, ' How do you like my new hat ? ' I asked, ' Is this 
the latest style?' 'Yes,' she answered, 'it is.' As it 
had not the least resemblance to any one of the other 
eleven hats, I asked whether all the others were out of 
style. 'No,' she said, 'that is something mysterious, 
which men cannot fathom, nor women explain. Well, 
how do you like my hat?' 'My dear lady,' said I, 'as 
I suppose you will like that hat the best which no one 
else would think of imitating, you surely have the one.' 
This seemed to please her better than if I had said, ' It 
is a nice, practical and most becoming one.' 

"Well, Rose, the secretary has cut off the tip of the 
tail, why can we not cut out the whole tail, the dessert? 
This would complete the banquet reform nicely, would 
,it not?" 

"John, are you so conceited as to assume that you, -a 
farmer, can set the pace for a new custom, because a 
high government official can? And even he will have 
but little success.". 

"Why not? A farmer is considered by the highest 
authority as the lord of aU he surveys, the embodiment 
of independence in the highest degree, while the Secre- 
tary of State is merely the servant of the people. Don't 
you remember when even our President Cleveland said 
that he was the hired man, and of course all officers be- 
low him also? No, no, farmers are the mainspring of 



Second Party Postponed 157 

our nation, and I do not see why we should not set the 
pace." 

Rose was amazed at John's presumption, his self- 
esteem, resembling Roosevelt. He is cut out as a leader. 
If fate had dropped him in a higher field of activities, 
who knows but that he might have reached the highest 
pinnacle of fame? But in his present position his en- 
deavors are futile, ridiculous. 

"These high dignitaries," John said, "remind me of 
what I read in the papers a few days ago, relating to, 
as Cleveland would have phrased it, 'the innocuous 
desuetude of woman suffrage.' I do not intend in the 
least to resurrect the interest you once had in this ques- 
tion, but only to add one more chapter to my ten rea- 
sons why I was opposed to woman suffrage, which I gave 
you some years ago. 

"This paper says that the wife of our ambassador to 
France gave her reasons why she was opposed to 
woman suffrage thus: 'While the leading women don't 
know enough to put pockets in their dresses, of which 
the men have a dozen; while they don't know enough to 
put the buttons on the front, instead of on the back of 
their dresses, so as to enable them to dress without hav- 
ing a servant at their back ; while they encourage a con- 
tinual change in fashion of hats, of dresses, and of ap- 
parel in general, and that of the most hideous styles. 
She would not trust them to have any part in the govern- 
ment of our country.' " 

Thus they discussed the proposed dinner pro and con, 
and as too many cooks spoil the broth, so did they, 
though only two. They cooked, baked, fried, too hot, 
then too cold, mixed such incongruous ingredients in it. 



158 John and Eose 

and were so long about it, that the meats were overdone, 
the desserts dried up and stale, the liquids evaporated. 

''Yes," said Rose, "this dinner is certainly spoiled. 
I am satiated and exhausted in the attempt at its prep- 
aration. It is too bad, as I had such a nice one 
planned. ' ' 

John said, "How easily you get discouraged. You 
must practice more persistency. Say, why not make it 
all into hash, which it will be anyway when it gets into 
the stomach, thereby saving all masticating, and thus 
avert the danger of over-eating ? ' ' 

This was too much for Rose. She felt terrorized. She 
really feared that if they dwelt much longer on the din- 
ner John's mental faculties would become affected. He 
must have a touch of it now or how could he entertain 
such ridiculous propositions? To avert such a catas- 
trophe she said, "John, I think the better way will be 
to postpone; the party to some other year." And so 
they did. 



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7 









CHAPTER XXIV. 

Compromise on the Second Party. A Discussion of the Tariff 

FINALLY, John and Rose having compromised about 
the dinner, the second party was arranged and 
held. 

In spite of Rose's fears, the invited guests were all 
present except a few, and among those present was only 
a single Democrat. After the usual preliminary saluta- 
tions, the conversation and discussion centered on a 
speech delivered by a Democratic candidate a few days 
previously. Our lone Democrat, of course, and a few 
Republicans attended the meeting, ^nd it gave them an 
abundance of material for discussion. 

Our lone Democrat, said, "WeU, gentlemen, it is too 
bad that every one of you did not hear our candidate. 
He went for the monopolists in great shape. Why, he 
did not leave them a shred to contradict him on. He 
would have convinced every one of the necessity of a 
change of government." John asked what his main 
points were. "Why," said the Democrat, "they were 
all main points! He said that discontent and unrest 
were floating over all the land, caused by the outrageous 
high cost of living. We have studied for some time to 
locate this cause, and at last have found it. It is the 
octopus trust and the robber tariff. Yes, he said all is 
plain as dirt. The trusts can make the prices as high as 
they choose, and the manufacturer can raise his price up 
to the 40 per cent protection. Give us a chance and we 
159 



160 John and Rose 

will burst the trusts, and you will see how prices will 
tumble. Down with the tariff, and we will save you on 
your goods forty cents on a dollar. 

"Why is it that the trust octopus and the robber tariff 
barons are making millions over millions? Because we 
allow them to and pay it all out of our own pockets. But 
wait ; all things have an end. The Republican Party, the 
mother of trusts, has nursed it and prosperity to such a 
stage of opulence that it endangers the life of our nation, 
and therefore we offer our services to call a halt, to get 
prices down, doAvn as low as we always had them in 
democratic times, down so low that everything will be in 
reach of the poor people. Yes," he said, "you may de- 
pend upon it, our banner is, 'Crush the Trusts and 
Banish the Tariff, ' and we will guarantee that the cheap 
times all are crying for will be with us again, as they 
always have been when we were in power. I tell you it 
was a fine speech ! ' ' 

John said, ' ' How easy it is to convert one if he listens 
to only one side of the question. I will wager that if you 
listen to the other side, you will admit that this speech, 
which seems to have convinced you, is all torn asunder, 
and has nothing left to stand on. 

"Now what are the facts of this issue? I am not in 
the least interested in any trust, I know nothing about 
them, and I cannot say anything against or in favor of 
their methods. But as to their products, there is a 
question whether these would not be higher in price 
without them. My convictions are that large corpora- 
tions can produce more cheaply than the many small 
ones, and if it can be shown that they take undue advan- 



Compromise on the Second Party 161 

tage of protection in some cases, we could put such 
products on the free list. This is as far as I would go. 

"Take, for instance, the beef trust, the one most con- 
demned, whose products are the highest in price and 
the most complained of. This trust was prosecuted for 
violating the anti-trust law, and after a long trial in 
court, and after being subjected to a severe investiga- 
tion, nothing could be found to convict it on, and noth- 
ing by which it could be held responsible for the high 
price of meats. It disclosed that the high price of meats 
is caused by the natural laws of demand and supply; 
and, further, that the packers make their millions by 
earning only one-fourth cent net on each pound sold. 
Their books showed only a reasonable profit on the 
many millions of dollars invested. I talked to a local 
German butcher about this, who told me that because 
he was used to the old method of butchering, he bought 
cattle from the farmers in the old way, which supplied 
about half of his trade, and the other half he bought 
from the packers. He believed that he could do better 
by buying all his meat from the packers, but continued 
partly in the old way because he was attached to it. He 
admitted that if it were not for the packers, who owing 
to their enormous output are able to utilize all the offal, 
which he had to throw away, meats would be higher still. 
The buying of cattle by the butcher stamps the asser- 
tion that the packer controls the price of cattle as un- 
true. 

"Now as to the tariff: Most people believe that if the 
forty per cent duty on manufactured goods is removed, 
goods will be that much cheaper, and that the manufac- 



162 John and Rose 

turers' profit will be that much less; as if the manu- 
facturers were making a. clear profit at least equal to 
the amount of the duty, which we will assume to be 
forty per cent. The fact is that his profit may not be 
seven per cent, and in some cases nothing, in spite of 
the forty per cent duty." 

Mr. Democrat wanted to know why such high tariff, 
if it gives so little protection, should not be reduced to 
ten per cent? 

John said: "It might be so reduced in many cases, 
and be as much protection as the forty per cent. This 
high duty is imposed because, as distance lends enchant- 
ment to the view, so many people think that distance 
also adds value to an article. They take pride in being 
able to say, ' This is from Paris, ' or from somewhere else 
abroad, although the home product may be superior. 
For this class the tariff is made high so as to discourage 
the buying of foreign goods, and those who do are 
made to pay for their folly. 

"This is on manufactured goods. Now let us see 
about the high duty on farm products, which many say 
gives no protection. But it does. On wheat the duty 
is 25 ct. a bu., barley, 30 ct. a bu., potatoes, 20 ct. a bu., 
and on eggs, butter, and other products about 30 per 
cent. The average duty on all farm products is about 
30 per cent. Here, again, we know that the farmer does 
not get as much more for his products as the duty im- 
poses. Six to ten per cent duty might protect him as 
much as the thirty per cent at times, but not always; 
and to protect him all the time the rate is made high. 

"Canada ships farm products in here, especially bar- 
ley, in large quantities the whole year, in the face of the 



Compromise on the Second Party 153 

high duty. Last winter, owing to our small potato crop, 
Europe sent millions and millions of bushels of potatoes 
over here in spite of our high tariff. It has been esti- 
mated that on an average the farmer is benefited by the 
tariff at least six per cent on all he sells from his prod- 
ucts. ' ' 

Our Democrat asked, ' ' Then why not reduce the duty 
to six per cent ? ' ' 

John replied, "While this might be adequate in nor- 
mal times, conditions may arise when in the face of the 
high tariff there would be an immense quantity shipped 
in here and flood our market. This is proved by the 
large quantity shipped in here now, and if this is done 
in spite of the high duty, we may be sure the imports 
would be immensely increased by a low tariff, or no 
tariff at all. 

"Take barley, for instance, which brings fifty-two 
cents a bushel here, on which the duty is thirty cents a 
bushel. We all know that because of this duty we do 
not get thirty cents a bushel more for it, or that we 
would get thirty cents less for it if the duty was re- 
moved, for then we would get only twenty-two cents a 
bushel, at which no one could afford to raise it. 

"The principle of the Republican party is to protect 
all classes alike, and exclude as much as possible all for- 
eign products which can be produced here as well as 
elsewhere, thereby reserving our immense resources to 
our own people. ' ' 

Democrat. "In such case, what would prevent the 
manufacturer from putting his price to the high-tariff 
limit?" 

John. "The many other competitors of our own 



164 John and Rose 

country. You must remember that we have free trade 
between forty-eight states of our Union, an extent larger 
than England, France, Germany, Austria, Norway, and 
Sweden. The competition among these states would 
make monopoly or agreeing on high prices an impos- 
sibility. ' ' 

Democrat. "Why would it be impossible for them 
to combine and agree on high prices?" 

John. "Yes, they might agree; but if they did, and 
thereby made a large profit, or only a profit a little 
over the average, this could not last long before others 
would know of it and build new factories in this line 
of industry, which would at once break up the com- 
bine, and create new competitors. 

"In this large, wealthy country, where money is so 
abundant that it is loaned on a four per cent interest 
basis, any enterprise promising, say, six per cent interest 
or profit can get all the capital required, and therefore 
we need not fear that the benefit of a tariff is for only 
a favored few. 

' ' If there is so much profit in the manufacturing line, 
why is it that every city and village has its business 
club, all trying their utmost to get factories in their 
midst, and as an inducement offer bonuses in addition 
to the high protection the government gives them ? Can 
anyone explain why this is necessary if factories are 
earning immense profits owing to the tariff? 

' ' Every country except England has tariff laws. Why 
should we allow such countries to sell in our markets 
duty free, when all we send over there must pay a duty ? 
Do the foreign factories which sell us their goods pay 
any taxes here, employ any labor here, build up or sup- 



Compromise on the Second Party 155 

port our country ? No, nothing of the kind ; on the con- 
trary, they draw out our money. 

"Do we not know that taking other countries as a 
whole, labor is only half as high as it is here ? How can 
one compete with them under such disadvantages, as 
labor constitutes about ninety-five per cent of the value 
of manufactured goods? For instance, an engine cost- 
ing $3,000 weighs about 25 tons. The ore required for 
this iron can be obtained on a royalty of eighty cents 
a ton. Assume that the 25-ton complete engine, owing to 
waste in melting and contraction, requires fifty tons of 
ore in the mine. This you can get at eighty cents a ton, 
making $40. Add $60 for brass and metal, and we have 
the total cost of the raw material as $100, and the balance 
of $2,900 is labor of some kind, bodily or mental. To dig 
it, haul it, smelt it, freight it, cast it, roll it, plane it — in 
short, it is all labor of one kind or another, to complete 
the $3,000 engine. If the engine builder were not pro- 
tected by a tariff, it requires but little argument to 
prove that in that case labor would have to be reduced 
to the foreign standard; and if this could not be done, 
then the engine could not be manufactured here." 

Mr. Democrat wants to know why it is that farm 
machinery and sewing machines are exported to for- 
eign countries in the face of the foreign duties, and 
then sold at lower prices there than here. 

John admits that this to many looks like a corker, and 
it has been used by every free trader as an unanswer- 
able argument against protection, but he explains : "It 
is a fixed policy of every manufacturer to operate his 
factory to its full capacity, as thereby he can best 
cheapen his production. In some lines, when the pro- 



166 John and Rose 

duetion exceeds the demand, they naturally look around 
for other markets, and so try to introduce their surplus 
in foreign countries. Thus it happens that such goods 
are at times slaughtered to get rid of them, in foreign 
markets, and hence the lower price you hear about. ' ' 

There happened to be a flour miller in the party who 
had had some actual experience in this line. He said : 
"Allow me to interrupt you here, as I can give you 
some facts in this case derived from my own experience. 
My mill grinds one hundred barrels of flour in ten hours. 
By having a traveling man on the road we can just 
about sell our ten hours' output, except in the fall, 
when the demand is strongest; then we run night and 
day for about two months, and make about two hundred 
barrels. At this rate the cost of operation and all other 
expenses is thirty cents a barrel, while when running 
only during the day and making one hundred barrels 
the cost is forty cents a barrel. 

"A flour mill can be operated just as well night and 
day. If I could run the mill nights this one hundred 
barrels would only cost twenty cents a barrel, or the two 
hundred barrels day and night output would cost thirty 
cents a barrel. I, of course, exerted myself to find a 
market for the night output. I was informed that some 
mills sent part of their flour to England, as this is the 
only country it can be sent to without being subject 
to duty. So I corresponded with a flour broker in Eng- 
land, to whom I sent samples. I ought to have received 
$4.20 a barrel, although at this price I made not a cent 
on the flour exported. But I saved ten cents a barrel 
by the double production, which enabled me to sell the 
flour at home at ten cents less, or make ten cents more 



Compromise on the Second Party 157 

a barrel profit. Well, what was the result? The first 
account of sale the net proceeds for a barrel of flour was 
thirty cents less than it actually cost me ; but the broker 
encouraged me to try another car, as the flour had to be 
introduced. So I sent another car, hoping to fare bet- 
ter, but it turned out about the same. But I still had 
hopes, and sent a third car. As I lost more on this 
than on the first, it broke the camel's back and I stopped 
exporting. When I tell you that for some of the flour 
exported I received fifty cents a barrel less than the 
same kind of flour was sold for right at the mill here, 
you would think it impossible, and yet it is a fact. 

' ' If your Democratic speaker should hear what I have 
just said, he would use it as the most convincing argu- 
ment that the tariff is robbing the people, and as a proof 
he would say: 'When a miller extorts from his custom- 
ers at home fifty cents a barrel more for flour than he 
gets for the same grade in England, does this not show 
that he must make an exorbitant profit on what he sells 
at home and makes you pay for it?' when the facts are 
that all millers are well satisfied with a clear profit of 
from ten to twenty cents a barrel, or, say, an average 
of fifteen cents a barrel. 

' ' These same conditions, with few exceptions, apply to 
the occasional cheap sales of farm machinery, etc., in 
foreign countries." 

The Democrat asked, "If, as you say, the foreign 
trade is a losing game, why is it that so much is being 
exported, and why don't others stop exporting as you 
did?" 

"Yes, most of them do. Some may cling longer to 
hope than I did," the miller answered, "and continue 



168 John and Rose 

longer losing money. Then, too, there are young men, 
or others young in business, who have not yet had any 
experience, and must pay for it in the same way I did, 
and therefore such experimental shipments will go on 
forever. It is an established fact that with but few 
'exceptions factories could not exist here if all their 
products had to be sold in foreign markets, except those 
having a patent monopoly." 

Mr. John tells of a mother's reasoning on the tariff. 
He said: "My mother, about twenty years ago, lived 
in a small house where her sons used to visit her fre- 
quently. Although she had seen eighty-six seasons come 
and go, she could read without glasses, having regained 
her sight about eight years previously. Ever since she 
left Germany she had received from the little village 
in which we were born, a little local paper about ten by 
twelve inches in size, which gave her the news, of which 
nothing escaped her notice. One morning she stepped 
into the little parlor, paper in hand, and said: 'Boys, 
what does this mean?' 'What is it, mother?' they asked. 
'Why, I see in this paper from our old home in Ger- 
many that their woolen mills sent over $50,000 worth 
of woolen goods, and it is predicted that after the tariff 
is reduced they will send ten times that amoiint over 
here. Don't we make woolen goods here?" 

" 'Yes, of course, we do, and plenty of them. But 
have you not often reminded us of the pitiable con- 
dition of the German workmen ? Should we not give them 
a share of our abundance?" 

" 'Well, well, since when have you become so unselfish 
and charitable? I begin to think you are a better boy 
than I gave you credit for. ' 



Compromise on the Second Party igg 

'"Mother, how often have you told us how thankful 
we ought to be that father brought us over here? In 
Germany we could never have had the opportunity 
which is afforded us here, and we cannot better express 
our thankfulness than by being charitable.'' 

" 'Yes,' said she, 'but we ought to take care of our 
people here first, instead of those across the ocean.' 

" 'Yes, perhaps so, but this is the Democratic prin- 
ciple that is now trying to get into power. ' 

" 'What,' said she, 'Democratic principle? Are they 
so much more unselfish than the Republicans ? Are they 
working for the benefit of those in Germany at the 
expense of our own people?' 

" 'Yes, it seems so. By the way, mother, you ought 
to go on the stump.' 

" 'On the stump. "What does that mean?' 

" 'That means going around the country and preach- 
ing protection.' 

" 'Yes, if all people were not selfish, if all those who 
dwell in a rich, resourceful country would share their 
riches and advantages with those not so fortunately 
located, in that case the theorist is right when he con- 
demns the tariff and contends that all should be free 
to buy in the cheapest market without hindrance. But, 
unfortunately, the human race is not so unselfish. A 
rich country will no more divide its riches with a poor 
country than a rich man will divide with a poor man. ' ' 

Our Democrat is still unconvinced. He is against 
the government, right or wrong. He says: "Pshaw! 
you can't tell me that the benefit of protection is equally 
distributed. Why, the manufacturer is getting about 
all there is in it." 



170 John and Rose 

Here Mr. Glaus gets Mm cornered. "Say, Democrat, 
what are you talking about? Don't you remember when 
you and I attended the meeting called by the Menomi- 
nee, Michigan, Beet Sugar Factory people for the pur- 
pose of making a contract for the next year's beet crop 
with the farmers? This factory cost over a million dol- 
lars. It contracted everj^ fall for its beets, and paid since 
it was built about ten years ago, $5 a ton for beets, except 
last year, when it paid $5.50 a ton. ' ' 

Yes, he remembered. 

"Well, then, do you also remember what a hot time 
we had when we were advised that they could not pay 
more than $5.00 a ton next year, giving as a reason that 
the Democrats were bound to lower the sugar tariff ? ' ' 

"Yes." 

"And after a long wrangle we compromised, and 
the contract was so written that they would pay us $5.50 
a ton, provided the tariff was not reduced, but only $5.00 
a ton if it was reduced, and this contract you signed 
too. Is not this the honest truth?" 

"Yes, this is true." 

"All right. Did you not tell me that you had last 
year ten acres of beets, had an immense crop of one 
hundred tons, which brought you $550, and did you 
not tell me this was the most profitable crop to raise 
on a farm, and that if you could get the help you would 
double the acreage next year?" 

"Yes, I have this option in the contract, but if the 
tariff is reduced by which I will get only $5 a ton, I 
think I shall not increase my last year's acreage." 

"Because the tariff cuts your profit in two. But sup- 
posing you do double your acreage and raise two hun- 



Compromise on the Second Pabty 171 

dreds tons of beets, and the tariff is reduced : this lowers 
the price of each ton from $5.50 to $5, and you will 
receive $100 less for your crop. This loss you sustain 
by the robber tariff, do you not?" 

"No, I have not, yet, and I may not!" 

"Don't this show plainly that when a tariff is reduced 
it will first hit the farmer and the laboring man? These 
it will hurt most, and the greatest number who can 
least bear it 

"Ten thousand farmers and laborers will lose to one 
single manufacturer, and these latter, although they will 
lose a larger amount, generally can bear it easier than 
the many thousand others. Then there is another con- 
dition. If the tariff should be entirely removed, no pro- 
tection of any kind remaining, the factories may be 
compelled to put the price of beets down to $4.50 a ton, 
at which price the farmer might be compelled to cease 
raising them altogether. ' ' 

John thought the moment had come when he could 
give our Democrat the complete knockout. If this 
would not completely solve the tariff question, nothing 
would. He asked our Democrat: "You say that if the 
tariff remains the same as now, you will double your 
beet acreage, but if lowered you will not ? ' ' 

"Yes." 

"Well, this is precisely what will happen to all the 
productions of our industries in the land. What will 
be the result of the reduced output ? As our miller told 
us, a higher production cost, which logically would raise 
the price of the goods produced. If these cannot be 
raised, owing to the cheaper price of foreign imported 
goods, or the price of labor lowered to meet this foreign 



172 John and Rose 

competition, then the factories here must close up, leav- 
ing our market to the foreigners and throwing our men 
out of employment, the same as was done to our mer- 
chant marine. Because it was the only enterprise not 
protected, it was swept from the ocean. If the reduc- 
tion of the tariff meant only that much less profit to 
the manufacturer, but still enough to avoid the neces- 
sity of lowering the wages of our men, it would be dif- 
ferent ; but this is not the case. The first who will have 
to suffer by a lower tariff are the laborer and the farmer, 
as was shown in the case of the beet raiser. 

"Let us now summarize the tariff: 

' ' Tariff laws have been in vogue in most countries for 
centuries, and must have proven beneficial; otherwise 
they would not have been enacted or retained. Com- 
merce is most sensitive to tariff legislation. If wisely 
adjusted and applied it will bring prosperity; if not, 
it will cause adversity. The tariff has been and will 
be the paramount political issue of our presidential 
campaigns. 

"The United States, from its birth to the time of the 
rebellion, had low tariffs, mainly for revenue only ; and 
in consequence had no factories to speak of. Nearly 
all manufactured goods were imported. 

"The first high tariff was enacted during the War 
of the Rebellion, 1862, primarily to raise war funds, 
but incidentally it provided strong protection, under 
which unexpectedly factories of all kinds were built, em- 
ploying a large number of laborers at good wages, and 
spreading prosperity over all our land. 

"As the high tariff proved such a blessing, it of 
course was retained after the war. Under it our fac- 



Compromise on the Second Party 173 

tories have grown to immense proportions, owing mainly 
to the immense market of our own country, enabling 
them to manufacture on a large scale, the most favor- 
able condition to produce cheaply. 

"Bismarck, about thirty years ago, said that he 
ascribed the marvelous prosperity of the United States 
to its high protective tariff, which induced Germany to 
adopt a high tariff system. Under it Germany is now 
outstripping free trade England, which formerly could 
defy the world to compete with her in manufactured 
goods, but is now alarmed at her loss of vantage. 

"The goods of Germany and other nations are over- 
flooding her markets, so that the people fear being 
swamped by them. They are beginning to cry for pro- 
tection and it will not be long until the English gov- 
ernment will have to give it. 

' * Experience has shown that as soon as a party hostile 
to a protection tariff comes into power, it throws appre- 
hension into all our industries; and when the tariff is 
really lowered, stagnation prevails all over the land, 
production is curtailed, lower wages are paid — in a 
word, hard times. 

"By such disastrous experience the people can best 
be taught the benefit of a protective tariff. And so 
they were. When the tariff was lowered they realized 
their mistake and reinstated the protection party to 
power, after which prosperity again blessed our coun- 
try for some years. But sooner or later the politicians 
will again prejudice the people against the protected 
few, as they claim, and so the tariff will be continually 
used as a political football. 

"That the general result of a low tariff mil be hard 



174 John and Rose ' 

times, and of a high tariff prosperous times, has been 
clearly proven by actual experience. 

"Gentlemen," Mr. Philoso said, "let me present this 
subject from a different angle. Supposing we were 
not so selfish as to exclude (as we do by our tariff) all 
foreigners from the benefits we enjoy, owing to our 
immense resources and opportunities, but were willing 
to share them with those foreigners less fortunately lo- 
cated. In that case free trade between all nations might 
benefit the nations as a whole, but it would be at a loss 
to us and other advantageously located nations. 

"The result would be that all wealth, earning power, 
opportunities, and the standard of life would be more 
uniform the world over. But now comes the obstacle. 
A common laborer in foreign countries receives about 
$1.00 a day, and for the same work a laborer in our 
country gets $2.00 a day; together they get $3.00 a day. 
Supposing you would say to our laborer, 'You ought to 
divide the abundant wealth you have here with the 
poor foreigner who is not so fortunately situated and 
has not the means to come over here. Be brotherly, di- 
vide with him. Allow him to make fifty cents a day more, 
and you fifty cents a day less, so you mil both get the 
same, $1.50 a day. By this sacrifice you will elevate him 
and alleviate the suffering of all humanity.' 

"Does any one believe that we will ever eradicate our 
inborn selfishness for such a benevolent act ? No, never. ' ' 

Rose had waited impatiently for the gentlemen to get 
through with their tariff discussion, as she had dinner 
ready. She asked whether they had digested what they 
had discussed, and remarked that they were probably 
exhausted and would require some nourishment ; and, if 



Compromise on the Second Party 175 

so, she would be pleased if they would proceed to the 
dining room. Our lone Democrat, who was so thoroughly 
defeated and driven into a corner in the tariff discus- 
sion, was glad of an opportunity to get out of it, and so 
led the procession, including the ladies, to the dining 
room. ' ' Now, ' ' he said, ' ' let us sit down and pitch in. ' ' 

After all were seated John rose and said: "Ladies 
and gentlemen ! If I had the eloquence of our Secretary 
of State I could tell you a long story of this dinner, or 
rather, supper, why it took us so long in its preparation, 
and how finally Eose and I compromised on it. But as 
this is too long a story I shall not tax your patience. 
The only thing I wish to mention is, that this will always 
be known to us as the compromise dinner, or supper. ' ' 

Here Mr. Philoso came forward and said: "Ladies 
and gjentlemen, please arise." They obeyed. "Now, 
my dear neighbors, let us express our sincere thanks to 
kind Providence that he has been so good as to 
plant the seed of prosperity in the Eepublican party, 
which has borne us such bounteous crops, from which 
all have reaped so rich a harvest. And let us hope that 
this seed may be transplanted to any other party which 
may steer the ship of state, and that it may be so guided 
that our prosperity will be retained and not turn our 
horn of plenty into an empty dinner pail." 

As this was another squelcher to our lone Democrat, 
he again said, "Now, let us all sit down and pitch in." 
Amid story-telling and joking the supper drew to a close, 
when there was a lull in the conversation. Our lone 
Democrat feared that to fill out the gap some one might 
renew the tariff discussion in which he was so terribly 
lambasted, and that he might again be bounced upon. 



176 John and Bose 

in the presence of the ladies, which would be the more 
humiliating. But he had recuperative power like his 
party, which although defeated time and again always 
bobs up again. He conceived a plan by which he hoped 
to divert the guests' minds from the tariff topic, so he 
proposed that some one should sing Auld Lang Syne. 
But no one volunteered. This he expected, as no one 
could sing it but he. Of course, he was called out, and 
he apparently hesitatingly responded. He had a good 
voice and sang until the rafters trembled. He was ap- 
plauded, and this greatly retrieved his former self- 
esteem. But he had more in store by which he felt con- 
fident he would completely wipe out the humiliation he 
had sustained in the tariff discussion. Then the ladies 
were invited to sing, to which some responded with good 
effect, and there were many encores. John was itching 
to be called out, as he considered himself to be the star 
singer of them all, having once upon a time been selected 
by the singing society to sing a solo at their concert. 

Rose noticed his eagerness and restlessness and said, 
"Say, John, won't you sing us the beautiful Abend- 
glocken (Evening Bells), which you sing so often?" At 
last he was recognized! Of course he would. He sang 
it so softly and sweetly that he had to repeat it several 
times. Now he was in his glory. As in everything else 
in which he was absorbed he could not stop, so he sang 
all the old songs he used to sing in the singing society. 
After the last was sung they all joined in singing 
"America" and "The Star Spangled Banner." 

Our lone Democrat felt so elated that he thought an- 
other exhibition of his superiority would completely 
redeem his defeat and restore his former eminence in 



Compromise on the Second Party 177 

the eyes of his conquerors, so he proposed that some one 
dance a jig. But as no one could dance it except he, he 
could get no partner. He knew this, so he danced it 
alone with great eclat and felt happy and completely 
vindicated. It was now dramng towards morning, and 
the guests prepared to go home. While their prepara- 
tions were in progress Rose whispered to John, how nice 
it would be if he, while the guests were departing, would 
he at the gate and sing "Gute Nacht" (Good Night). 
This would give the parting a nice rounding. Why, yes, 
how gladly he would ! Thus, when the guests were some 
distance away, he sang his piece in such loud tones that 
it must have awakened the birds in the forest. 

After the guests had all departed, Rose said: "Well, 
John, was this not a grand party? How much more so 
than the first we had, at which you with your rough 
corners scratched all present, so that they left in a hurry. 
Who should have thought that I in only a few years 
would be enabled to cut off your rough edges and polish 
your manners, by which this party ran along as smooth 
as velvet and as sweet as honey ? ' ' 

To which John ejaculated: "Ya, ya, it don't take 
much to mould and polish a soft stone. ' ' 



CHAPTER XXV. 

Trips to Bermuda Islands, Hot Springs, and Natural Bridge 

JOHN'S second life insurance policy for $2,000 be- 
came due, and as he and Rose had never made 
an extended journey, he thought they were entitled to 
one, and that he would spend a part of this income for 
travel. He speculated where best to go. As the expense 
played an important part, they must plan the trip to 
conform to their purse. 

He had often read about the beauties of the Bermuda 
Islands, lying in the Atlantic ocean, which have a sum- 
mer climate in midwinter. He had also heard his 
father tell about the wonderful natural bridge in Vir- 
ginia, and had often longed to go. He suggested the 
Bermuda trip to Rose, telling her that it would only 
take about a month, and they could be back before farm 
work commenced. 

Rose at oncei agreed to such an alluring invitation, 
which would entail no expense on her. "Why," said 
she, "this will be splendid, just at the right time of the 
season, too. As regards our children, they are all of 
an age that we can leave them in the care of my sister, 
who will take them for a month with pleasure. ' ' 

Preparations were made, and on the second day of 
April they started for the Bermuda Islands. On their 
way they stopped and remained a few days at Wash- 
ington. Then they continaed their journey to New 
York; and from there sailed on April the seventh on the 
English ship, Bermudian, for the Bermuda Islands. 
178 



Trip to Bermuda Islands 179 

While passing out of the harbor there were many ex- 
pressions of regret that nearly all the ships were for- 
eign, hardly an American flag being visible. The sea 
was smooth. The next day they saw and passed many 
ships, but it was as when they left the harbor, they 
were nearly all foreign ships. 

The passengers began a discussion as to the cause 
which forced an American, who wanted to travel only 
a few hundred miles on the ocean, to do it on a foreign 
ship, his own country having none. Some thought it 
is a shame that the citizens of the United States have 
to depend on the foreigner for their transportation. Such 
remarks as the following were heard: "Has not our 
country or have not our merchants the patriotism to keep 
up our merchant marine, to show the world that the 
United States of America is on the map?" "It is no 
wonder that other nations are getting the business, be- 
cause our maritime trade is handicapped for the want 
of a merchant marine." "I have often thought about 
it, and must say I could never solve it, and never found 
one who could. But there must be a reason for it, and 
I should like someone to give it. ' ' 

John had been an interested listener, and as he 
thought that he could give the reason convincingly, he 
said, "Gentlemen, allow me to give you what I think 
are the reasons. We all agree that our business men are 
the shrewdest in the world. If investment in ships paid 
better than in any other line, they surely would know it, 
and because it does not, they don't invest in them. The 
fault does not lie with the business men, but with our 
government, which protects all industries except our 
merchant marine. 



180 John and Rose 

' ' Ships can be built in foreign countries for one-third 
less, and operated for one-third less than here. This is 
hopeless competition. Gentlemen, you will have observed 
that the reviving of our merchant marine by subsidy, 
which question has engaged the minds of our congress- 
men for over twenty years, without any accomplishment, 
is again being seriously considered by our present con- 
gress, upon the recommendation of the president. The 
reason why it has failed so far is : — 

'^ First. Because the term subsidy is very obnoxious 
to our voters and a scarecrow to the politician. 

'^ Second. It is regarded as sectional because it is 
believed that it will benefit only those sections of our 
country bordering on the sea coast. 

''Third. It is considered class legislation because it 
is proposed to subsidize only the larger and speedier 
class of ships. This last objection is the most tenable. 
If our protective tariff had been drawn so as to give 
protection only to the large, wealthy, progressive indus- 
tries, it would have met with stronger opposition than 
the subsidy bill now meets ; in fact, could not have been 
passed at all. Therefore, if we want to foster our mer- 
chant marine by government aid, we must do it on the 
same lines ; that is, by protecting not only one class, but 
all, without discrimination. This we can best do- 

BY EXPORT BOUNTIES 

paid principally on manufactured goods carried out of 
this to foreign countries, in American ships, large or 
small, fast or slow. Only by such an impartial system 
can we hope to induce our capitalists to invest in ships 
for foreign trade. 



Trip to Bermuda Islands 181 

"There is nothing which more clearly demonstrates 
the benefit of protection than the decadence of our mer- 
chant marine. While nearly every other industry com- 
peting with foreign countries is protected, our merchant 
marine has been left to struggle unaided to keep afloat, 
and has had to retire from the ocean and surrender to 
the foreigner. 

' ' That our ships, wherever they compete with foreign 
ships, labor under a most disadvantageous condition 
with no hope of reasonable earnings, is generally known, 
and the most convincing proof of this is that we have 
no merchant marine. 

OUR SEA COAST CAPITALISTS 

would like nothing better than to invest in ships, even 
if the net income would not exceed four per cent. There 
is something fascinating and patriotic in owning a ship, 
sailing to and returning from foreign countries, with 
but little exertion and labor to the owner. 

"But no one ventures on these seas of commerce be- 
cause there is not only no chance of a profitable voyage, 
but it is absolutely known before the start that such ship 
is going to its doom. Therefore the capitalist selects the 
more safe and more lucrative interior seas for his opera- 
tion. Our merchant marine can only thrive by govern- 
ment aid, 

OR UNDER FREE TRADE 

and low wages, as we had before the war, when practical- 
ly free trade was in vogue. But at what fearful loss to 
our home industries, which were then as scarce on land 
as now our ships are on the ocean ! 



182 John and Rose 

"Upon protecting our industries, the flags of our 
ocean ships were transferred a thousandfold on our 
manufacturing plants, from one end of the country to 
the other, and spread prosperity beyond expectation. 
Of course this was at the loss of our merchant marine, 
but this is only an insignificant loss in comparison to 
our gain in manufacturing. 

"We cannot have a merchant marine unprotected and 
our industries protected and have both prosper. The 
protected will thrive, while the unprotected must perish. 

"All agree that a merchant marine would be of im- 
mense benefit to our commerce, and incidentally train 
our young men in navigation, so essential to our navy, 
and thus give us more prestige. 

"Every stump speaker enthuses his audience most 
when he takes a ship, hoists a flag at its peak, points it 
to all parts of the compass, and promises that this is the 
way we will sail and show the world that we are on the 
map and on deck when we get into power. 

"There is no appropriation the government can make 
which will so surely be repaid as the one to aid our mer- 
chant marine. But not as now proposed, to aid only the 
large and speedy ships, which mainly carry the wealthy 
tourists, who carry millions of dollars away from here 
to foreign lands. No, it must be for all ships that carry 
away our products and bring back millions of dollars to 
our shores. 

' ' It seems to me that a bill on the lines above proposed 
has a better chance of passage, and is more equitable and 
effective, than the class legislation heretofore under con- 
sideration. 

"What products are exported, and the amount of 



Trip to Bermuda Islands 183 

bounty to be paid thereon, so as to give the best results, 
can be easily ascertained by the government statistical 
departments. 

"All may as well take it for granted that we cannot 
have a merchant marine without government aid, and if 
we fail to extend this we should not wonder and lament 
that we have none." 

As this presentation was somewhat novel, the discus- 
sion continued to a late hour. 

Next morning John and Eose were early on deck, so as 
not to lose the view of the island from afar. The sun had 
just emerged out of the ocean under a clear sky as the 
little island came into view. When quite near they 
noticed in front of St. George's entrance an old-timer, a 
square rigged brig, a foreign ship, lying at anchor. 

St. George is the naval station on the north end of the 
island, while Hamilton, their destination, is the govern- 
ment seat, and is situated on the south end. They saw a 
launch coming out of the St. George's entrance, which 
they were told had a pilot on board. All were surprised 
to see that he was a full-blooded negro. This was a 
novelty, to see a negro taking full command of a ship 
with all its white passengers, whose safety depended 
upon his guidance. 

The steamer kept close in shore, running parallel with 
it in a crooked course, dodging a coral reef here and 
another there, for these abound on all sides. The water 
is so clear that one can easily see the bottom. 

"When nearing Hamilton, John looked for the harbor 
piers, as he had never entered a harbor without these 
structures; but nothing appeared, all rock reefs and 
water. Finally they headed for a little opening between 



184 John and Eose 

two barren rocks, about fifty feet above the water, and 
ninety feet apart. The steamer passed through this en- 
trance, and then ran about one-half mile, again dodging 
coral reefs, into a basin, which had a few docks built on 
its sides. At one of these they landed. There were but 
few ships in the harbor, and these again were foreign 
ships. Here their destination was reached. They en- 
tered a hack, and were driven to the Hotel Hamilton. 
On their way to it they observed what is generally con- 
sidered the most conspicuous sight on the island, a large 
tree, about forty feet high, and ninety feet in circum- 
ference around its branches, in full bloom, with flowers 
of a scarlet red, without a green leaf on it. It looked 
like a large red ball, and is known as the sword tree. 

John's long cherished hope that he might visit these 
islands had at last been realized — its descriptive beauty 
verified — it is a paradise ! He described it in his home 
paper as follows: 

''Bermuda is a jewel, a beautiful precious diamond, 
pinned on the bosom of the Atlantic Ocean. It is in 
nature a piece of luxury, not of material value. It has 
no natural resources to speak of — not even fresh water, 
which has to be gathered from rainfall. The only pro- 
duce from which it derives a scanty income are onions, 
potatoes, and Easter lilies, and if it were not for the 
tourist crop, the population on the island — about 6,000 
whites and 14,000 negroes — could not exist. 

"The buildings on the island are nearly all fireproof, 
also the docks and fences, and almost everything is con- 
structed of stone — even the shingles on the roofs. Build- 
ing material is sawed out of coral rock, which abounds 
everywhere, just as we saw lumber out of logs. 



Trip to Bermuda Islands 185 

"Nearly all buildings, including roofs and fences, 
which are of unusual height — from eight to twelve feet — 
and enclose every homestead, are whitewashed; and as 
the roads are also gray white it is dazzling and trying 
to the eye. 

"The climate is superb, and with the flowers, is the 
main attraction of the island. It is now as with us in 
mid-summer — flowers of all the varieties we have at 
home, and in addition many tropical kinds are in full 
bloom and many remain so the year around. Flowers 
here, there and everywhere. 

"Yachting is a great diversion for the tourist. There 
are about fifty yachts, nearly all of one size, about thirty 
feet long, and all propelled by a triangle sail. They are 
owned and sailed by negroes. They flit continuously 
back and forth between and around the different islands, 
and many are always in view from the large hotel ve- 
randa. They present a splendid, varying picture. Every 
other day there is a yacht race somewhere. There can- 
not be a more favorable place for yachting. Rose and I 
have often taken these little yachting cruises — over 
which she enthuses without end, and she cannot under- 
stand why I cannot appreciate all, as she can. How can 
I remain so complacent, with all these beautiful sur- 
roundings, while she drops in ecstasy at every turn and 
scene? "When the first time she noticed the hues of the 
water different from ours, she rapturously exclaimed: — 

" 'Look, John, how beautifully grand here the view 
The waters, how costly, and heavenly Nue, 
And all around here how perfect, sublime! 
There is nothing like it in our northern clime.' 



186 John and Rose 

" 'Yes, Rose, in part I will agree with you, 

And that is, they are certainly costly to vieiv; 

But when I think of the more beautiful green 

Which every day without cost can he seen 

Right at our home, why then enthuse 

Over all this hlue — which gives me the '^hlues" — 

While the tropical sun is burning my nose 

As red as the brightest Bermuda red rose. 

But I see '' distance lends enchantment" to a scene. 

And therefore the blue conquers the green.' 

"The roads are excellent, like the best macadam, and 
in many places they are hewn out of solid rock to a 
depth of fifty feet, and run in all directions over the is- 
land, which is about twenty miles long by one wide. 
These roads are used a great deal by the tourist. The 
native growth of timber was originally exclusively red 
cedar, but as the island has been inhabited over 400 
years, the oleander and many other tropical trees and 
flowers are now growing wild. 

"To keep in harmony with the luxurious surround- 
ings, England maintains a navy yard, a few war vessels, 
and about a thousand soldiers here. 

"The tourist, besides following the ordinary paths of 
pleasure, as carriage and boat riding, going to all 
churches to fill out the remaining time, switches on less 
sacred paths, which one seldom does at home, as going 
to theatre, concerts, and balls, at one of which I was in- 
vited to a dance. I bore patiently everything so far, but 
here I had to draw my line. What foolish things a per- 
son must put up with when traveling for pleasure. But 
nevertheless the island is a fairy land. 



Trip to Bermuda Islands 187 

In Europe they say, 

"See Naples and die." 

This to Bermuda 

We can apply. 

But why die? 

When during my stay 

I gained a pound every day f 

Then why not say this: 

''See Bermuda, and live!" 



HOT SPRINGS, VIRGINIA 

They drove to St. George, the navy station, and to 
other points of interest, and after having been on the 
island ten days they boarded the steamer Bermudian 
for New York, stopped there a few days, and then pro- 
ceeded by rail to Natural Bridge, Va., known as a won- 
derful natural architectural structure. On their way 
they would pass near Hot Springs, Va., a bathing place, 
known as a resort for the idle rich who bask in the 
height of fashion. 

Eose, never having seen a place like it, suggested that 
they stop over for a day while they were so near it. 
John thought they would be out of place, but he never- 
theless consented to Rose's wish. They entered a bus 
and with others were driven to the Homestead Hotel, the* 
grandest in the little place. It was an immense build- 
ing surrounded by large verandas. Here they had a 
chance to get initiated into fashionable society. 

Although the many guests, nearly all from the large 
cities, presumably came there for recuperation, or a 
change of life, to enjoy and stroll around the beautiful 



188 John and Rose 

woods and surroundings, go bathing and exercising in 
tlie fresh air, they loitered their time away inside the 
hotel on the limits of the verandas. They slept until 
nine o'clock in the morning, dawdled a few hours away 
at breakfast; at dinner and supper they used about the 
same length of time, and then prepared for dress parade. 
They appeared in the height of fashion, with the intent 
to excel or to attract and draw the admiration and the 
envy of the other guests. 

Rose called John's attention to this or that costume, 
the glittering diamonds, and to one dress especially 
which she thought must have come from Paris and must 
have cost more than $1,000. John said, "That slouchy- 
douchy dress? I don't know what yours cost, but I 
know it did not cost over $50, and I and most men will 
find it more beautiful. ' ' 

Rose said, "Yes, you and the men. John, do you 
notice the men have large shirt bosoms which they dis- 
play, and how straight they have their pantaloons 
creased and turned up at the bottom 1 ' ' 

"You bet I do," said John, "and this brings me back 
to my boyhood. When we bought our pants how anxious 
we were to get the creases ironed out for fear we would 
be ridiculed; and when they were too long at first and 
we had to wear them crimped on the bottom till they 
shrunk shorter, how we were teased about it. Well, the 
crease is not so bad, but the crimp on the bottom is a 
nuisance, gathering dirt and unsightly. I cannot under- 
stand how anyone should follow such a filthy fashion. ' ' 

Rose had brought a book on etiquette with her, from 
which she had read a great deal on the journey. She was 
in hopes that it would excite John's inquisitiveness to 



Trip to Bermuda Islands 189 

know what she was reading, and thus casually get him 
to study manners, of which he was so ignorant. Of 
course she did not remind him of it by frankly holding 
the book up to his face, as that would have infuriated 
him as a red flag angers a bull. So she never risked it. 
But she would tempt his curiosity by laying it down 
where he could see it and read it in her absence. But 
no use! John was not inquisitive, because he knew all 
the time what the book contained. 

When at the dining table, amidst the many fashion- 
able guests whose critical eyes would muster each other, 
Rose became nervous. She worried, fearing that John 
would forget himself and think he was home shoveling 
down his meals the quickest way he could with knife 
and fork, so as to get through in a few minutes. This 
was not so bad at the other hotels, when everything was 
in a hustle, but here one was put to the test and she 
feared the result. 

Because of these apprehensions she mildy reminded 
John how careful all were to eat with the fork only. 
John noticed her anxiety and knew the cause. ' ' Yes, I 
see," said John, ''I will try not to forget. Not that I 
want to show my respect for others, but to please you, 
and save you from embarrassment. ' ' 

By this he was again reminded of when he was a boy 
in Germany. "In Germany," he said, "we were taught 
to eat with the fork only. When we came here prac- 
ticing this acquired habit, we were asked if all the Dutch 
had lame or sore arms. We were teased and ridiculed 
till we had to Americanize and eat with knife and fork ; 
and after acquiring that laborious habit we were again 
forced to go back to the German custom. ' ' 



190 John and Rose 

In the evening they sat in the corner of the large 
reception hall watching the throng, parading, surging 
back and forth, gesticulating and conversing in an ani- 
mated manner. The most obtrusive were two officers 
dressed in full military uniform with swords dangling 
from their belts. Then there were an artist and a group 
of actors, all dressed conspicuously to suit their voca- 
tion, so that by the flash of the eye one could know what 
they represented. 

Rose wondered whether their station in life could so 
easily be detected by the clothes they wore ; and if they 
could, whether they would be looked upon as intruders. 
These thoughts disturbed her and she felt abashed. 
John noticed her discomfiture and to allay her fears 
said, "All move and act with the greatest composure. 
Even the strutting officers, artists, actors and actresses 
who are so conscious that they are the cynosure of all 
eyes. But why not? They deceive no one as to their 
vocation. For instance, all know that the officers are 
ready to kill, the actors to play or sing, and if we are 
identified, to give them their daily bread. 

"Here is a paradox. The ones who should be least 
considered are the officers, because their vocation is to 
destroy and kill, yet they are the most admired. Those 
who should be considered the most are the farmers, be- 
cause they peaceably produce ; yet they are esteemed the 
least." 

"Yes," said Rose, "you may talk about a farmer's 
prominence, but it is of no use. If you mingle with this 
throng you will subject yourself to ridicule, snubs and 
insults. This is attested by our fear to mingle with them 



Trip to Bermuda Islands 191 

and timidly keeping in the background, in the corner. 
Why don't you try to mingle with them?" 

"Try it?" said John, "I don't need to try. I know 
I can. I can keep my head up as high as any of them, 
and if a fop insults me I will quickly resent it by going 
him one better, or worse. I might create a sensation 
which no one would fail to see or hear, and be honored 
as a hero. You know all honor a winner when he is 
on top, no matter who he may be or whether he is right 
or wrong. No, that I am not in the least timid, as you 
say, is shown because I keep in the background; this I 
do because you are the best company I can keep. But 
to show you my self-esteem I will now enter the arena, 
and you keep watch. " 

Rose became alarmed. "For goodness sake, don't," 
she pleaded. "Suppose you get into a quarrel with the 
officers. You say they are always ready to kill, and if 
one should only unsheath his sword and point it toward 
you I would swoon away in my little corner. ' ' 

This led John to say, "When I think of it, those 
officers are really the most offensive in the multitude. 
They come brazenly around, have an undue advantage 
over all others, and therefore can defy all who differ 
with them, without fear. They are the ones out of place, 
and they ought to know it; and if they don't that is 
sufficient reason to ignore them. So do not fear' that I 
will come in contact with them. I saw in a paper an 
illustration of a Washington ball. Here the military 
officers predominated, and it surprised me to see that all 
of them had their swords buckled to their belts. What 
a nuisance this must be to the ladies whose dresses get 



192 John and Rose 

tangled and torn by them. I/wondered why such per- 
sonages are tolerated at all or^' such occasions. ' ' 

It was now past ten o 'clocH a late hour for them ; but 
as the air in the hall was quite warm they agreed to go 
out on the veranda for a While before retiring. They 
found the outside air more refreshing, as a light breeze 
was wafted to them from ^he near-by hills. 

After a while they hesbfd the clear tones of a whip- 
poor-will. 

"Oh, my!" said John, "a whip-poor-will — the first I 
have heard since I was a boy, when I sat outside on 
warm summer nights. Why, this is delightful! Is it 
not strange how pleasantly one can be affected by so 
little 1 The tones in themselves are not musical, but be- 
cause they are seldom heard, and then only in the night, 
and especially to me because they are associated with 
the happy times of my boyhood, they are most de- 
lightful." 

Kose was interested to learn whether the call would 
be answered by the mate. John explained, ' ' Oh, no, the 
females of birds do not sing." 

''Yes, that is so. Then it must be his rival trying to 
excel. Is it not a strange coincidence that nature has 
endowed the male of the feathered tribe with the most 
beautiful voice and plumage, while in the human race 
it is just the other way ? ' ' 

"B.ose! it just occurred to me how much happiness I 
derive by recalling incidents happening in my past life. 
Then, too, the older we grow the more our thoughts dwell 
on the past rather than on the future. This is because 
in youth we believe the road to our end is long, that it 
requires all our thoughts and strength to get there ; and 



Trip to Bermuda Islands 193 

hence we are more concerned about our present progress 
than the future. But the nearer we approach the end 
the more we slack our pace and take time to look back. 
Then it is that you will derive either pleasure or sadness 
from your recollections. For instance, if by going back 
along the road you find only fortunate or happy inci- 
dents, and that you always followed the path of recti- 
tude, in such a case these recollections will revive them 
again and give you great comfort. But, if not, the re- 
collections will sadden you, especially if they should re- 
call any mean or dishonest act that you were guilty of. 
All pleasures, especially those derived from pure 
motives, are not only enjoyed at the moment, but every 
time we recall them; so wrong doings not only distress 
us at the moment they are committed, but haunt us 
throughout our whole life. 



"What pleasure in our olden age 
When turning hack, page after page 

In our memory hook, 
To find nothing therein contained 
For which we need he ashamed 

When hackward we do look. 

"Eose, I have often thought that our public schools 
should give more time to the teaching of morals. The 
children should be taught that every wrong act will ex- 
act fearful restitution. We are all actuated to do things 
for gain of some kind. If we impress children with the 
idea that any gain wrongfully acquired will be at an 
enormous loss at the end, I believe it will have a whole- 



194 John and feosE 



some effect. Cause and effect /should be constantly held 
up to them by examples in stories, in plays, and in every 
other conceivable manner. "Well, let this suffice. I think 
we had better retire as it is quite late. ' ' 

The next day was Sunday, and the ideal spring 
weather tempted them to take a stroll around the beauti- 
ful grounds. Every little while they were asked if they 
had seen the countess, who, they Avere told, arrived the 
night previous, stopping at a private residence. The 
whole village was thrown into excitement. It was cir- 
culated that the countess would attend church in the 
morning. Of course the church would be crowded. 
The chance to worship her, if none other, could not be 
lost. The little church was located on a beautiful road- 
way a quarter of a mile from the hotel. Early a stream 
of worshipers wended their way toward it. Though 
John detested worshiping humanity, to please Rose he 
meekly followed her guidance. As they were early they 
managed to get a seat inside of the church. The great- 
est number had to be content to remain outside on the 
lawn, but the opportunity to pay homage to the countess 
was a sufficient reward for their uncomfortable station. 
She was late, as such personages usually are, by which 
they wish to impress others with their importance. 
After a long suspense she arrived in an equipage. 
When she entered the church there was no seat vacant, 
but in an instant half a dozen persons jumped up to 
have the honor to seat nobility. 

There was so much commotion and craning of necks 
that the minister, who had commenced his sermon, had 
to stop to quiet the worshipers of the countess, so that 



Trip to Bermuda Islands 195 

he could be heard. His sermon was an appropriate ex- 
position of the beauties of spring. After he had con- 
tinued for some time he touched on bird singing. At 
this point there happened a phenomenal incident which 
stirred the whole congregation to a high pitch of solem- 
nity. Just when the preacher uttered the words "bird 
singing" a mocking bird perched on the open window 
frame and sang its lay, sweet and clear, by which all 
were piously affected. It seemed as if Providence had 
dropped it there to give more effect to the minister's 
utterances. Some thought it was a special dispensation 
for the countess. The minister again had to stop until 
the bird was through with its song, and then continued 
without further interruption. 

After the ceremony was over the congregation pro- 
ceeded to walk out, all but the countess, who remained 
seated near the entrance, to give all a better opportunity 
to observe her at close range as they filed by. But this 
did not satisfy. The people ranged themselves along 
both sides of the walk for quite a distance. Then the 
countess majestically appeared and walked through the 
file of worshipers in triumph. 

John said, "Well, if that doesn't beat everything!" 

"Yes," said Rose, "this is awful, subjecting the coun- 
tess to run such a gauntlet, such an insult. How em- 
barrassed she must be by a thousand eyes staring at her. 
It is a shame." 

John answered, "Why, no. This is just what she came 
here for. She glories in it. She accepts it as an honor, 
and so it is. You need not concern yourself about her 
embarrassment. No, you had better envy her pleasure, 



196 John and Rose 

the enjoyment she derives from the homage paid her. I 
don't blame her either for accepting these obsequious 
attentions. I blame those who so humbly extend them. 
'What fools we mortals be.' I have had enough of this. 
Here everything goes against my grain, or I run against 
the grain, I don't know which. I must have been bom 
that way, or I was born too many years ago — getting too 
old. Yes, I guess that is it. 

"Well, Eose, I suppose you too have had enough of 
this high life and I hope you have not been infected by 
it. I think to-morrow we shall proceed to more nati:y:'al 
surroundings, where we will feel more at home — to 
Natural Bridge. What do you say 1 ' ' 

"Why, of course," said Rose, "that suits me to a dot. 
I wondered what kept you here so long. I almost sus- 
pected that you might have found some one attractive to 
you or you attractive to some one else. Of course, I am 
glad to get out of here. ' ' 

TO NATURAL BRIDGE 

The next morning they boarded the train for Natural 
Bridge, but a few hours' ride. As soon as they arrived 
they took the only bus at the station, and were soon at 
the Natural Bridge Hotel, the only hostelry in the vil- 
lage. "Ah," said John, "this is more in harmony with 
our station in life, more like our country hotels ; it just 
suits me." 

The whole village had but a dozen houses. They were 
surprised at this, because they had thought that a place 
they had read about in school, and that had been re- 




Natural Bridge, Va. 



Trip to Bermuda Islands 197 

uowned for iiimdreds of years as containing one of the 
natural wonders of the world would, at least, be a good 
sized village, and would have several prominent hotels. 

Of course the first walk they took was across the 
natural bridge, only a stone 's throw from the hotel. Al- 
though it was wonderful, it did not come up to their 
anticipation. They imagined that it spans a large 
stream, but discovered that it crosses just a small creek, 
about 100 feet below. The span over the gulch is about 
200 feet long and 40 feet wide. They descended to the 
creek and inspected the name of George Washington 
carved on a rock abutting close to the stream. 

The next day John went to a barber's shop, but found 
the door closed. He was told that the barber was oc- 
cupied elsewhere, and would be around in about an hour. 
In an hour he returned, the shop was opened and ready 
for business. John told the barber of his astonishment 
that the village was not larger, and the barber explained 
that most of the tourists stopped only long enough to 
cross the bridge and back, consequently larger and more 
pretentious hotels could not be sustained; and as there 
were no other resources the village was limited and its 
growth stationary. After he had been shaved he handed 
the barber the smallest coin he had with him, a 50-cent 
piece. The barber fumbled around to find change, 
when John said, ' ' Never mind, keep it all ; you deserve 
it, as you may not get another to shave during the day, ' ' 
which the barber admitted might be the case. 

John asked the barber what his regular charge for 
shaving was. The man of the razor answered, ten cents. 

' ' How foolish you are ! " John retorted. ' ' You are the 



198 John and Rose 

only barber in town — you have a monopoly in your trade. 
Why don't you grasp your opportunity as the monopo- 
lists do, take all you can get, or all people will stand for ? 
No one can underbid you. Charge at least twenty -five 
cents. This is not unreasonable. The courts would up- 
hold you as a reasonable trust, as you could prove that 
you were not earning a dollar a day at that rate. ' ' 

"Twenty-five cents a shave!" said the barber. "I 
surely would be advertised as the greatest shaver in the 
country. No one would stand for it, or better, no one 
would sit for it in my chair. ' ' 

"Here you are mistaken," said John. "If you are 
right that this would advertise you as the greatest shaver 
in the country, your reputation and fame would build up 
your little village into a large city, and you would be- 
come a capitalist. 

"Things and services are not valued by their actual 
worth, but by their costliness, rarity and reputation. 
God knows that you are a rarity. Now, add to this high 
cost, fame and name. What is your name?" 

"Arter." 

"Well, we will change it to Artist. I am sure that 
you will make a success of it if you follow my advice; 
and if you do you will feel under obligations to me for 
giving it. 

"If I can afi'ord to give you fifty cents, being only a 
farmer, and poor in comparison with most tourists that 
come here, I believe you could just as well charge a dol- 
lar, as many would consider themselves as receiving full 
value by having the privilege of saying that they were 
shaved by the greatest artist at Natural Bridge. Yes, 
you better try it. Won 't you ? ' ' The barber was so in- 



Trip to Bermuda Islands 199 

flated by the prospective wealth and fame John held up 
to him that he could make no coherent reply. 

John felt elated over the generous advice he had given 
the barber, and told Rose all about it, and how it affected 
the barber, who from now on would live in happy ex- 
pectancy. 

Rose smiled and marveled at John's sagacity. "I 
wonder," said Rose, ''that you did not advise the bar- 
ber to incorporate, because you are so fond of stock com- 
panies. He could call it the Natural Bridge Greatest 
Shaving Company, make Mr. Artist president, me secre- 
tary and you treasurer. If it promises as well as you 
made the barber believe, it might offer an opening for 
our Adam." 

John exclaimed, "Shaving Company! Oh, no, this 
would suggest what it might develop into, and discour- 
age all temptations. No, I would substitute Artist Com- 
pany. This would be a better drawing card. As for 
our Adam, I would never want to see him associated with 
such institutions. However, we will drop it 'at present, 
and think it over when we are home and in a normal 
state again. We need not fear that anyone else will in- 
fringe on my schemes. ' ' After having seen all there was 
to be seen they took the cars for Lexington, Virginia, 
only an hour 's ride. It has the Washington and Lee Uni- 
versities and the military institute of which Ceneral 
Lee after the late Civil War was president. He and 
General Jackson was buried there. They remained only 
a day, and then entered on their homeward journey. 

When they neared the depot, they were notified by the 
screeching sound of the locomotive that the train was 
waiting, which inspired John to exclaim : 



200 John and Bose 

"Oh, what a sh^ain, 
When nearing a train, 
That so warningly screams 
From its surplus of steam. 

But now this dire strain, 
Is at once changed 
To a most pleasing sound, 
When we are homeward hound. 



CHAPTER XXVI. 

Their Silver Wedding. A Discussion of Socialism, Municipal Ownership, 
and Bellamy ism 

ROSE called John's attention to tlie approach of 
their silver wedding. "Well, well," said John, 
''already!" "Yes," Eose replied, "on Washington's 
birthday ; and let me tell you we ought to celebrate it in 
grand style, make it a noble affair, and have a dinner 
as elaborate as a state dinner to excel everything in our 
neighborhood." "You mean a supper, Eose, don't 
you?" "Why, no; a dinner at supper time, don't you 
understand yet?" "Well, never mind," said John. 
"Do you intend to have a large party? You see, this 
might cut into our investment fund." "Well, what if 
it does?" replied Eose. "Don't you remember the very 
simple, inexpensive wedding we had, and without a 
wedding trip ? Of course then we could not well afford 
a more expensive one, but now, twenty-five years later, 
I think we can afford to go to a Kttle extra expense, 
being only once in twenty -five years, can't we?" 

"I don't know about this; let me look up our invest- 
ment fund and see how much it has grown in the twenty 
years since it was planted." He reverted to the com- 
pound interest table (Chapter V) and said, "Why, how 
fast it has grown ! It must be in fertile soil. 

My $1,000 has grown in 20 years to $ 8,146.64 and your S500 to $ 4,073.32 

And on our golden wedding will be 30,047.30 and yours will be 15,023.15 

" " " diamond " " " 46,878.60 ' " 23,439.30 

" " " 70th wedding day " " 71,792.96 " ' 35,896.48 

201 



202 John and Rose 

''But let me stop here, for it will soon run into mil- 
lions, which to possess will make anybody miserable, 
hated, distrusted and unpopular. Aside from this, I 
see our private deposits in the savings bank have in- 
6reased considerably." These figures so enthused 
John that he feared he might become one of the hated 
rich, and forget all about the simple dinners he once 
tried to convert Rose to. He was now so reckless that 
he gave Rose cart Manche to the menu and its expense. 
Thereupon it was agreed to invite all in the country 
roundabout, and make it a most democratic affair. 

Just before Washington 's birthday a heavy snowstorm 
blockaded the roads, and Rose feared many of those in- 
vited could not come. But some of them did, and 
were profuse in their congratulations on their silver 
wedding. The conversation was animated, the ladies 
recalling the happy daj^s of the past, while the 
gentlemen discussed socialism. "Yes," said Mr. Lang, 
"it is proposed that all productive enterprises shall be 
conducted by the United States, the states, or municipal- 
ities. Everybody is discussing it. The farmer is not 
directly concerned, but he, too, is infected by it. ' ' 

After dinner the gentlemen withdrew to an adjoining 
room and continued the discussion. Mr. Abel said : — 

"Now let me give you my opinion on municipal 
ownership of public utilities. As this question has been 
so thoroughly threshed out, I will only state the most 
salient features of it. The whole benefit, in a nutshell, 
lies in dollars and cents, and the service rendered. 

"Some dispute this by saying, we don't care for dol- 
lars and cents, and even if a private service is better and 
cheaper than a municipal one, we want our own for prin- 



Their Silver Wedding 203 

ciple's sake. While this sentiment may influence some, 
I imagine there are but few who can be converted to 
municipal ownership by this sentiment. 

' ' It cannot be compared to an instance where honor is 
at stake; it has no connection with the saying, 'Millions 
for defense, but not a cent for tribute. ' As long as you 
are fairly treated, there is no excuse for ruining your fel- 
low men, nor resorting to revengeful measures. 

"The mainspring of municipal ownership is, what 
material benefit will it be to us ? I admit that in many, 
especially large cities, public service corporations have 
made exorbitant profits on their franchises, while in 
smaller places I am quite sure some lost money, and on 
the average none have made more on their investment 
than any other industry, and are well satisfied with a 
7 per cent net profit. If this is conceded, and good ser- 
vice rendered, then I cannot see the benefit to be de- 
rived by the people owning and operating public utili- 
ties. 

' ' Now, if a private plant, with its superior economical 
operation, can only earn 7 per cent on its investment, we 
may safely assume that a municipal plant would not earn 
more than 5 per cent, if that. 

"What benefit would be derived by the inhabitants if 
they would invest their money in a public plant earning 
but 5 per cent, when they could earn double this if they 
kept it in their own business and under their own con- 
trol? 

"The socialist, the main force advocating municipal 
ownership, does not stop at this, but embraces all sources 
of production and distribution, as railroads, street cars, 
coal yards, insurance, banks, all factories ; in fact, nearly 



204 John and Rose 

everything. They even go so far as to take in the saloons 
on the theory that these too belong to the class of public 
utilties, because they only exist by the suffrance, or 
license, of the council. 

''It is claimed saloons could be better regulated by a 
city than by individuals in that they could be better 
limited in number, kept better socially and morally, and 
would give to a city a larger net income, than all the 
other public utilities combined. What would such an 
evolution in our social life lead to ? 

"There would be created an office-holding class of 
immense proportions who would appoint the operators. 
They would control and manage all for which they were 
more or less fitted. 

"The Democratic party, after the Republican party 
had been in continuous power for over twenty years, 
made this campaign argument from the stump : How 
can any other party get into power, when the party in 
power has all the government appointees behind its 
back, who will invariably vote for the party that ap- 
pointed them? 

"If these comparatively few can exert such influence 
over our elections, how much more would this be if the 
appointees of the government were increased tenfold! 
Some will say that all must go under civil service. That 
would mean an appointee to be retained in office during 
good behavior, perhaps for life. Others say that we 
could disfranchise them; yes, all this can be tried, but 
we will find it of no avail because there would be such a 
determined struggle by those in power to hold onto it, 
that any change attempted by which a rotation in office 



Their Silver Wedding 205 

could be attained, would be almost impossible of accom- 
plishment. ' ' 

John here entered the discussion and said: "Gentle- 
men, the whole socialistic agitation reminds me of the 
time I was on the verge of being converted to Bella- 
mjdsm. 

"It was in the prime of my life, always in a hurly 
burly, full of worry, so that I yearned to get out of hot 
water, and was in a receptive mood to grasp for any- 
thing promising to lighten my burden, when some one 
asked me, 'Say, did you read Bellamy?' I asked, 
'What? Who? Why?' 'Bellamy's book. "Looking 
Backward." ' I said, 'Pshaw! I have no time to look 
backward. I am looking up, on, and forward. 'Well,' he 
said, 'it strikes me the title is wrong. It ought to be 
"Looking Forward. ' ' But no matter ; here, take it along ; 
read it, you will find it very interesting.' 

"In the evening, after I had finished smoking, and 
was cozy in my easy chair, I said to my wife, ' Some one 
gave me a book which he says is immensely interesting. 
Please sit down and pay attention. ' 

"After having read a few pages we agreed it looked 
unpromising. Then I tried reading backward, to con- 
form to the title, but this too proved uninteresting, and 
so I threw the book in a corner saying, 'Why, he is a 
crank. ' 

"A few days later I said to my benevolent friend: 
'Say, you must have a queer literary taste to accept 
Bellamy as interesting. Why, he is crack-brained. ' He 
asked, 'How much did you read?' I told him several 
pages forward and several backward. 'Well,' he said. 



206 John and Rose 

'you have not touched the heart of it. Keep on, keep 
on, it will come. ' 

"In the evening I told my wife that my friend had 
said to keep on reading and we would enjoy it. So we 
continued and read the book with the greatest of in- 
terest. 

"All was so beautifully pictured that my mind was 
continually occupied with it, and to more fully grasp the 
realization of such a social evolution, I embraced every 
opportunity to tell others about it, hoping that thereby 
I could draw out a discussion by which I might be en- 
abled to form a correct conclusion of the alluring millen- 
nium. But I seemed to be a bore to my listeners, and 
to some a crank. 

"Nevertheless one day I asked a lawyer whose good 
judgment I highly respected: 

" 'Say, did you read Bellamy?' 'Who?' 'Bellamy's 
book, ' ' Looking Backward. " ' ' No, ' he replied, ' I have no 
time even to read what I must, my law books. ' 

" 'There you are,' I said; 'no time, always in a hurry. 
This book points the way to get rid of all the hurry, 
worry, and strain of brain. I know you would enjoy the 
change of life as described therein. Take it along, and 
read it at your leisure.' 

''' ' Oh, I can 't. Can 't you give it to me in brief ? ' ' Yes, ' 
I said, 'come into the back room. Here is a cigar which 
is appreciated most when smoked slowly.' I hoped if 
he did, I could pin him down until I should get through. 

" 'Now please sit down and take it easy, 

" ' I know when I give you the synopsis of this book, 
you will at first wonder that I gave it a second thought, 
but no matter, here it is. 



Their Silver Wedding 207 

" '1. Bellamy portrays social and political life as 
existing in the year 2,000. It is similar to a community 
of interests, or a colony, which in a small way, from time 
immemorial, has come and gone and exists to-day. But 
his plan embraces the whole of the United States and 
foreign countries. In brief, a grand National Trust. 

" '2. The people would own jointly all existing prop- 
erty, would build, construct and produce all that is re- 
quired for the public welfare. 

" '3. Each would get precisely the same pay as the 
other, the common laborer as much as the most in- 
tellectual, the weak as much as the strong, the sick as 
much as the healthy. The pay is based on effort ; as long 
as a person does his best, according to his endowed 
strength, it makes no difference how much or how little 
he produces. 

" '4. All have the same opportunities for education, 
which is compulsory from the age of 6 to 21 years. After 
this all must serve three years, to their 24:th year, as com- 
mon laborers, and during those three years every one is 
required to ascertain for what vocation he feels himself 
best adapted. 

" '5. After one has made his choice he labors in his 
chosen trade or profession to his 45th year, after which 
he is retired, but retains a general interest and over- 
sight over the public welfare, and performs the duty of 
electing officers. A certain class elects the president. 

" ' 6. The stores, banks, and all other sources of pro- 
duction and distribution will be operated by overseers 
or managers appointed by a board of commissioners. 

" '7. There will be only one general store in each 
ward or precinct, which has only samples, on which the 



208 John and Kose 

quality and price is labeled, needing no further explana- 
tion. There will be no clerks to bother or to bother you, 
they only appear when you ring the bell, take down the 
order, check the ticket, and send it to the general ware- 
house, from where all is delivered to the buyer. 

" '8. There will be churches, but you need not go 
there, as every house has a telephone room so constructed 
that the full volume of sound will be wafted to it when 
connection is made. In this wise you can hear the ser- 
mon, the singing, the organ, all or as much as you can 
digest. 

" '9. Besides this there is a city band playing dur- 
ing every hour of the twenty-four, the program of which 
is in all rooms. These you may listen to, one or all ; also 
at night, in ca^e you cannot sleep, you can connect it in 
your bedroom until it will lullaby you to slumber. 

" '10. There are beautiful club rooms, offering en- 
tertainments of all kinds, in the most interesting manner, 
excelling anything in our present day. 

'' '11. There will be no money; instead of this, there 
will be tickets by which all are paid. Of these each will 
get precisely the same each month for his labor, or for 
no labor. 

" '12. There will be no state government, no army, 
no navy, no taxes to pay, no saloonkeepers, no bankers, 
no politicians, nor lawyers. 

" 'These, then, are the twelve commandments.' The 
last one struck his vital spot, 'no lawyers.' 

"Although I saw his cigar was not half smoked, I 
feared that the last commandment would break the 
camel's back, and he break loose, so I quickly summed up 
thus: 'Now look here, would this not be a paradise to 



Their Silver Wedding 209 

live in ? What enormous waste could be saved in produc- 
tion and distribution? I venture to say that it would 
exceed 75 per cent. If all need work only three hours 
each day to ten now, how much more time could be given 
to education, comfort and pleasure. No worry for the 
present nor the future, no struggle in life, no envy, no 
strife, no motive to lie, to deceive, or to cheat. Well, I 
need not enumerate them all, for I know your broad 
legal training can grasp them in a minute.' 

"But I was sorely disappointed when he relieved his 
pent up feeling by bursting out with: 'AH confounded 
nonsense! Why, this Utopia has been dreamed of from 
time immemorial, has been tried and always failed. 
What incentive to effort would there be?' I answered, 
'More than now. Look at children in school: without 
material reward, they strive at times beyond their power 
to keep up with their mates. Look at our soldiers, with 
no incentive of material reward. They will offer their 
lives for merely the honor and fame it will bring to their 
names. Look at our office-holders : how many could earn 
more in other pursuits ! and many, vdthout any compen- 
sation at all, will work harder for the public than for 
themselves, mainly because they are continuously in the 
public eye. How content are they if they get the public 
approval of their services, so seldom appreciated ! They 
would value this more than dollars and cents. No nor- 
mal person wants to live in a community and be con- 
sidered a drone, and be despised by all.' 'Well,' he 
asked, 'do you mean to say that a lazy subject should 
get the same as the industrious one ? ' 'Yes.' I thought 
laziness is a disease. It would be harder for any nor- 
mal, healthy person to be lazy, than for a lazy person to 



210 JopiN AND Rose 

be industrious. The intention is that all shall exert 
themselves and do their best, according to their strength. 
Again he askfed, ' And a person endowed with great bodily 
or mental ability would not fare any better than a weak- 
ling or a fool?' 'Why, no,' I replied, 'are you re- 
sponsible for your strong body and cranium, and I for 
my frailty and foolishness? We are born that way, are 
we not ? Because you can work out a problem with less 
effort in three hours than I can in ten hours, why should 
you expect more when you exert yourself less?' Now 
came the climax, when he asked: 'Look here, this will 
prove the pudding : would you divide, give all your hold- 
ings to such a community of interests?' We had now 
reached a practical, cold test. After gathering my wits, 
I answered : ' Yes, to get rid of my worry, and live a life 
in ease and comfort to the last of my days, I would. But 
hold on, before I do this you must draw up an iron-clad 
government bond, so that in case the trust should burst, 
all must be returned to me with interest.' He left in a 
hurry, with not even the hope that he would ever make 
a fee by drawing the bond. 

"After so able and broad-minded an attorney, for 
whose experience and honesty 1 had great respect, had 
ridiculed the idea I completely collapsed and tried to 
dismiss the whole matter from my mind. 

' ' But every little while I was regretfully reminded of 
the flagrant, unequal distribution of wealth, the con- 
centration and consolidation of interests, by which im- 
mense corporations were created, and while through such 
combination cheaper commodities could be produced, 
and even if the people got the benefit thereof, still it 
would have to be at the loss of individual independence, 



Their Sil\^r Wedding 211 

and at the loss of opportunities for young men to open 
up a business of their own; which is valued and enjoyed 
more than all the reduced price of commodities can 
effect. 

"I have always thought that the income and inheri- 
tance tax, which is now recommended by the president, 
would in a measure keep down large accumulations, and 
hope that such laws will be enacted. 

"Now, after all I have said, I fear we will hardly 
know where we are at. But in one particular, I can tell 
you where I am at : I am a Republican, have the utmost 
faith in the principles of the Republican party, believe 
it has done more for mankind than any other party on 
earth, that it will continue on the same lines in the 
future that it has heretofore, and is at present clear- 
ing out of our political field all noxious weeds, which 
are bound to spring up in the best of fields, carefully, 
without pulling out the good grain also. "While I be- 
lieve in republican principles as a whole yet, in some 
particulars, I thought they might have progressed faster. 
At times I was conceited enough to imagine that if I 
were a Bismarck, given absolute power to enforce any re- 
form measure I might entertain, how quickly could I 
improve existing conditions. 

"But it is perhaps fortunate that such power was 
withheld from me, as otherwise there might be nothing 
left to reform. The monotony would prove unbearable. 
People wiU rather be without easier life, and increased 
luxury, than to lose their independence. This I can best 
substantiate by my little launch cruise. 

"Some ask, 'Why are you so foolish to cruise in your 
little launch, where you are cramped for room, in great 



212 John and Rose 

danger of being drowned, when you could cruise on a 
palatial steamer at one-fourth the cost, with far more 
luxury, comfort and safety?' 

"My answer is, 'I enjoy paddling my own canoe, even 
if cramped, more than if carried by some one else in a 
roomy, luxurious, safe, palatial craft, even if at less cost, 
and less danger.' 

"Another illustration: — 

"Upon a time I found myself surrounded by eight 
widows. They were so near as to influence my study of 
their peculiar habitations. They nearly all lived single 
and alone, within a radius of a block of my home. One 
of these lived alone in her large house on a large lot, 
which had ample room to comfortably house all eight 
widows. I said to my wife, ' What nonsense ! Why can- 
not these eight widows room together, instead of keep- 
ing eight houses? One would do. How much could be 
saved, and how much more pleasure be derived, by al- 
ways having company. ' 'Why, ' she said, ' this would not 
do at all; they could never agree; each would rather 
live alone in a shanty than live with another in a 
palace. ' 

"So this shows how difficult it is to get the people to 
adopt a new order of things even if it mil give more 
comfort at less expense. But while it is difficult for a 
speedy reformation, we are gradually adopting im- 
proved measures and slowly getting nearer perfection. 

"I often hear the old folks say: 'What are our people 
coming to? In our younger days all was better,' I 
answer, 'No, our people and existing social conditions 
are an improvement over those of earlier days. They will 
continue to improve, but whether we will ever near per- 



Their Silver Wedding 213 

fection is a question. That we will ever reach perfection 
is hardly to be expected. And if we should we would 
want a change, even if for the worse ' ' ' 

When the men rejoined the ladies they found them 
inspecting a tiny photo card. "We are comparing our 
present appearance," said Rose, "with that on our en- 
gagement cards. You remember our little tilt over them 
twenty-seven years ago, and my judgment is shown to 
have been right. " " How John has changed, ' ' said Mrs. 
Sontag. "Yes," said Mrs. Candid, "he has changed 
considerably, but his hair, what there is left of it, is still 
dark." Mrs. Lure said his nice smooth skin reminded 
her of her baby. "Yes," said John, "I am getting 
younger." Mrs. Trade remarked, "Is it not queer that 
Rose retains her looks so well?" "Yes," John said, 
"Rose is so saving that she wears her feature dress with- 
out change, while I change mine every year, and am al- 
ways in fashion. While the ladies bare only their shoul- 
ders, I do it higher up, on top of my head." "Well, 
John, ' ' said Rose, ' ' did I not tell you that without these 
cards no one would have noticed our change in looks?" 
Rose then told the story of the cards. John admitted 
that he had been mistaken. "But that is not impor- 
tant," he added. "When it came to the real question, 
you must admit that I exhibited excellent judgment. 
In life's rose garden I selected the most beautiful one 
in it, one without thorns, and the most lasting ; and that 
was you. Rose. ' ' Rose blushed, but it was with pleasure. 

After the last guest had departed, Rose said, with a 
radiant look, "WeU, John, while this was not a large 
party, I feel happier than I did at the first one." To 
which sentiment John heartily agreed. 



CHAPTER XXVII. 

Eva Gets Married and Departs From Her Childhood Home 

A MOST natural event, hoped for, and yet accepted 
with apprehension, now confronted the parents, 
in the marriage of their only daughter Eva. 

Rose had observed during her life so many marriages 
which had turned out disappointing that she looked 
upon matrimony as an uncertain thing — a gamble, its 
future clouded in mystery. 

But what could she do ? She could not choose a hus- 
band for her daughter, because the one selected by her 
might not suit Eva, or Eva might not suit the one she 
had selected; and even if her choice should be entirely 
satisfactory to both, it might be a great misfit. 

She could not bear such responsibilities; she must let 
Eva follow her own inclinations without interference, 
and trust to fate. As Eva after marriage would move 
about fifty miles from home, it grieved Rose nearly as 
much as if she would lose her forever. 

Eva being the only daughter. Rose could devote much 
of her time and ability to the education and training of 
her character, and she had done her duty in this regard 
better than is done by most mothers. 

But she feared (as John did about Adam, when he 
left) that Eva might forget the moral lessons she had 
endeavored to instill, so at the final parting she gave 
her the following farewell precept, as a memorial : 
214 



Eva Weds and Leaves Childhood Home 215 

Now, Eva, for these many blessed years 
From childhood to this, to you, eventful day. 
You shared our home, were always near 
Your parents who led you on the righteous way. 



Although you'll lose a mother's constant care, 
A father's sometimes sterner reprimand. 
You never lose their love and sincere prayer 
That truth and virtue escort you to the end. 

So let us hope that all the moral lessons 

Your parents wished your youthful mind to grasp 

Have tahen root, so they will never lessen 

To he your constant guide as long as life may last. 

You'll miss the compayiy of many of your friends 
With whom you lived a life of youthfid Miss, 
But youthful joys as everything else will end 
When married life brings holier 



And when in silent hours you meditate, 
Your thoughts will often wander to dear home; 
But as the scenes of childhood one cannot forget 
So for the actual scenes the memory will atone. 

And yet for all that's dear you leave behind, 
You'll find a recompense in wedded life 
If, as you have sworn, that for all time 
You'll love each other, will be realized. 



216 John and Rose 

As you will feel a void, so we will miss 
Your charming presence when you do depart, 
But will console ourselves with memories 
And keep your image ever in our hearts. 

Now when you part from all these happy scenes, 
The hallowed home, the garden, lake, and shore 
Your whole life has embraced, let it not seem 
To you as lost, and not to he restored. 



So, then, farewell, our dear, your future guard 
With whom you joined your future life this day 
To share the joys and sorrows of your hearts 
To him, your dearest, we give you now away. 

Now they stood at the parting of the ways, and it 
must be expected that this was a trying moment to the 
parents, who were so deeply concerned in Eva's future 
welfare. 

Especially was Rose sadly affected, as she lost the 
companionship of an only daughter. With the bless- 
ings of the parents and many good wishes for her future, 
Eva tore herself loose from the dear ones, to enter a new 
life to which fate had ordained her. 



CHAPTER XXVIII. 

John Makes a Cruise, and Describes it in a Yachting Magazine Thus: 

CRUISE FROM MANITOWOC TO OSHKOSH AND RETURN VIA 

LAKE MICHIGAN, GREEN BAY, FOX RIVER, AND 

LAKE WINNEBAGO. 

All sunshine without rain — 
A weather all the same — 
A sea always in calm — 
In a cruise has not the charm, 
As mixed with rain and shine, 
With thunder so sublime, 
With wind and roaring sea — 
It breaks upon the lee. 
And even a little wrecked, 
When safely we get hack 

To port again, 

I'll not disdain. 

I HAVE had in mind for some time to write up a 
cruise, if not all too smooth, for I consider a story 
of all love without tragedy, or music without variations, 
too monotonous. At last such a condition presented it- 
self, which enabled and urged me to carry out my inten- 
tions. 

The weather had been cold and dreary the whole 
summer, and we had passed the middle of August, when 
one would expect to see sunny skies, and I determined 
if I wanted to take a cruise I must take it now. So I 
informed my friend, Charles S., that we would go the 
217 



218 John and Eose 

first promising day, which finally presented itself on 
August 20th. Our course was laid out to the North, 
past Kewaunee, Algoma, Sturgeon Bay, and to Bailey's 
Harbor, for the first day. Then to North Bay, Detroit 
Harbor, through Death's Door to Chamber's Island in 
Green Bay, to Menominee ; then to Green Bay City, Ap- 
pleton, and Oshkosh, where we intended to stay during 
the yacht-race week. 

I must here describe our little gasoline launch. It is 
35 feet over all, 7 feet beam, draws 30 inches, and has 
a little cabin 6 by 7 feet, the roof of which is laid on 
loosely and is filled between beams with 100 tin cans, 
and in emergencies can be used as a liferaft. The power 
consists of a double-cylinder, 8-horsepower engine, and 
it has two spars and sails stored underneath the floor, 
and only set in place when cruising on the lake. It has 
no cooking accommodations, as we depend upon taking 
our meals on shore at hotels. When necessary two men 
can sleep aboard, but this was seldom done. 

Our party consisted of Charles S., his son Walter, 
his companion John B., Emil S., the engineer, and my- 
self. Thursday morning, August 20th, opened up most 
promisingly. Mr. S., with his son, and John B., drove up 
back of my residence, on the river bank, near the dock, 
where our launch El Tempo was moored. Mr. S. was 
busy preparing things. My dear wife and daughters 
were preparing lunch, and at a quarter past seven 
o'clock all went to the dock preparatory to departure. 
My son came from across the river with a yachting 
cap, which he thought an important reserve, as on my 
last year's cruise I had lost my hat overboard at Hat 
Island, in Green Bay, after which I thought the island 



John Takes a Lake Cruise 219 

had been named. Now all was ready; the lines let go; 
and, with good fare thee well, we sped out of the harbor 
into Lake Michigan, heading northeast for Two River 
Point. 

What a glorious morning it was! The lake like a 
mirror, the sky without a cloud, the morning sun glisten- 
ing gently on the blue waters, only the swishing of the 
spray from the speed of the launch breaking the quie- 
tude. We soon passed Two Rivers, when the Two River 
Point lighthouse came to view. When abreast of this, 
we came in view of Kewaunee Point, and at half past 
eleven were off Kewaunee Pier. By this time the wind 
had freshened to a summer breeze, which freshened still 
more when off Algoma, which was about 1 p. m., and 
we concluded to set our foresail, as the wind came from 
the southeast. After setting sail we all joined in taking 
our dinner, which consisted of cheese, ham sandwiches, 
and bottled beer, and our dessert, cigars. We were now 
abreast of Whitefish Bay and in sight of Jackson Port. 
Bailey's Harbor lighthouse now came to view, towards 
which we kept our course, but on nearer approach we 
discerned the entrance a mile to the west and a vessel 
lying at the pier towards which we pointed. Bailey's 
Harbor is a natural harbor or bay, or cove, protected by 
reefs on either side. It has a deep channel, about 1,000 
feet wide and 20 feet deep, while the water above the 
protecting reefs, or ridges, is only about two to five 
feet. A buoy indicates the channel. We tied up to the 
pier close to a fish shanty, threw out our small anchor at 
the stern, so that in case the wind shifted the launch 
would not pound on the dock. 

Then all proceeded to the hotel. It was now half past 



220 John and Rose 

five, and I 'phoned home of our safe arrival. We all 
agreed that we had had ideal weather, smooth sea, made 
85 miles, and created a good appetite on our first day's 
cruise. 

- After supper we sauntered around the little village. 
I inquired about a certain gentleman, to whom my firm 
had sold flour and feed some 25 years ago, and who 
owed it over $500 — the amount it charged to loss and 
gain. I was told he had been dead these many years, 
but his wife was then still living. 

At ten o'clock we all went to bed. Early the next 
morning, when looking out of the window, I observed 
a dark sky, a strong south wind, and the lake in the 
process of commotion, and remarked to my companions 
that we were cooped here for the day. After taking 
breakfast we all proceeded to the dock, I asked a life- 
saving officer whether he thought we could go out and 
get around the point, after which we would have fair 
wind and the sea running with us. He did not know. 
Then I asked a fisherman, and he thought we might try 
it. So we did, and steered through the channel to the 
buoy. The sea was making fast and broke with aWe- 
inspiring breakers over the shallow reefs. We were 
pointed square into the head seia, and took three seas 
over our bows. We now ran towards the stake and 
turned north, running with the wind and sea towards 
North Bay, our objective point, eight miles distant. The 
waves rolled high behind us, but as they were not chop- 
py, but long, ocean-like, our little launch labored most 
gently. As I had never seen her in such high seas, I 
looked behind every little while to see if any of the 
high seas would wash over the stern, but was relieved to 



John Takes a Lake Cruise 221 

find that they did not. After having been out one-half 
hour, we could see North Bay, but did not discover the 
entrance. After a little while we saw a reefed schooner 
pointing to where we thought the entrance ought to be. 
We surmised that she was running in there for shelter, 
as the wind was increasing and ahead, which afterwards 
turned out to be correct. So we pointed our launch on 
the same course, and saw breakers on two sides of us, 
and kept onr course in the middle where the water ap- 
peared more quiet, indicating deeper water. In ten min- 
utes we had passed the entrance, and now entered the 
smooth inner North Bay, which is about five miles long, 
east and west, by one to one and a half miles wide, 
north and south. The wind was now howling through 
the trees from the south, and we tied our launch on the 
south shore to an old pier, where the water was as quiet 
as in a river. 

A feeling of peaceful contentment crept over us all, 
as we had escaped the dangers of the sea and were now 
in the quiet harbor while the elements were at their 
height. 

We all went on shore. Walking along the beach, we 
heard the hammering of carpenters. We followed the 
sound and found a Norwegian building a small cottage. 
We asked him if we could find accommodations near by. 
He said no, but we need not go hungry, as he would have , 
pity on our souls. About a mile along the beach, to- 
wards the lake, we saw a cottage and what appeared a 
small boat on shore, towards which we wended our way. 
Coming to a fish shanty, in which a lone fisherman was 
eating his breakfast, we inquired about the way. He 
laid down his knife and fork and offered to show us the 



222 John and Rose 

way. After guiding us for about ten minutes he pointed 
out the path to us. I gave him $1 for his kindness. 
After a ten-minute walk we arrived at the cottage, 
which we found out belonged to a concert troupe man- 
ager. There were three gentlemen and three ladies and 
a few children in the party. He told us that he had 
purchased forty acres of land, and intended to make this 
his summer home. A gentleman was painting the cot- 
tage dark green. I told him this was a mistake, as all 
the surroundings were green ; it would be better to paint 
it red, with white trimming. This seemed to impress 
him most favorably. He consulted his companion, and 
I should not wonder if the cottage were red and white 
when I visit there again. They further told me that 
they had given a concert at Manitowoc. We were treated 
to a lunch, lemonade and cigars, and they regretted they 
could not provide lodgings for us, but they recommended 
us to a Mr. Marshall, across the bay, who kept boarders, 
and would be glad to have us stay with him. 

"Why," I said, "the wind is blowing a gale; we 
cannot lie over on the other side of the bay." "Oh, 
yes," he replied, "there is a little cove and a pier and 
five feet of water. All the yachts dock there." This 
looked tempting. I ordered my men to bring the El 
Tempo from her moorings at the old pier. After its 
arrival we crossed the bay for the little pier in a cove, 
which only took ten minutes. The wind was south. We 
found the pier built of logs, like a log house, the butts 
of the logs protruding. It was about twelve feet wide, 
and, as we had to lay at the end, our launch overreached 
the corners about twelve feet forward and aft. There 
was a little sea, and as there were no fender piles the 



John Takes a Lake Cruise 223 

little launch was in danger of getting damaged by the 
butts of the logs. We attempted to put down planks in 
front of these logs, so that the launch could lie safely 
against them, but could not make them hold. Then we 
threw our small anchor to wdndward, so as to keep the 
launch riding away from the dock. 

All our satchels were on the dock, to be taken to the 
hotel. Now the wind changed to the southwest, the most 
unfavorable course for a launch, and blew a gale. I at 
once saw that we could not remain, and ordered all our 
baggage to be taken aboard again. By this time the 
resorters had gathered on the pier; men and women 
helped to hold the launch away from the pier, so that 
we could get away. The lines were cast off, and we again 
started. All jumped on board, and we pointed away 
from the pier across the bay. But, lo ! the propeller 
wheel struck the protruding dock logs and broke one of 
its two blades, which stopped the headway of the launch, 
leaving her at the mercy of the sea, and threw her on 
a ledge of rock, on which there was about fourteen 
inches of water, alongside the pier. A long line was then 
thrown ashore, and all the resorters, ladies included, 
pulled on it, so as to get the launch as much as possible 
out of the water and out of the force of the waves. My 
notion to scuttle her was not necessary, as she lay upon 
her side and filled in a few minutes. There she was; 
nothing could be done until the sea went down, except- 
ing to take out cushions, sails, oars, spars, anchors, and 
all things movable, which we laid on the pier. 

After these last rites were performed we prepared 
for dinner. We all agreed that an actor's advice and 
information as to navigating into harbor or cove must 



224 John and Rose 

not be given much credence, for if we had followed our 
own inclinations our shipwreck would not have occurred. 
The little cove into which we were lured might be safe 
in perfectly smooth seas, but a death trap in any little 
wind from the southwest. 

The dinner was not partaken of with the best of ap- 
petite. Mr. Marshall, our landlord, consoled us by say- 
ing we were not the first wrecked there, and that about 
four miles on the road to Sister Bay there lived a fisher- 
man with his four sons, who was an expert wrecker, and 
had rescued many out of the same hole we were in, and 
was reasonable in his bills, as wrecking charges go. Of 
course, I must see him at once, so he furnished me with 
a buggy and driver, who made daily trips to Sister Bay. 

We departed at 2 p. m. The wind was holding its 
own. The little launch rolled gently back and forth 
on its side, the stem chafing on a log in the pier, which 
at each roll made a mournful sound. This affected me 
about the same as it would a mother, hearing the groan 
of her sick child. I was relieved when we drove away 
from this sound, but then again was reminded of the 
still raging storm by the rustling of leaves of the forest 
trees. While this at other times was music to my ear, 
now it sounded like demons. We now arrived at Fisher- 
man Monsen's house, who promised to be there next 
morning with his four sons, with tackles, etc., provided 
the wind died down. 

From here we drove to Sister Bay, six miles distant, 
from where I telephoned to my family that we had had 
a splendid run from Manitowoc to Bailey's Harbor; that 
we left there for North Bay in a heavy sea, and were 
now safe at North Bay, but caught on the lee of the 



John Takes a Lake Cruise 225 

bay at a small pier, from which we could not get away, 
and that we might have to stay there for several days, 
as the storm was severe. Here I bought several kinds 
of nails and some other material, which I thought might 
be used in our wreck; but they were not needed. On 
our homeward drive I observed, as expected, that the 
wind had spent its force and was slackening. When in 
sight of the launch I noticed that she rocked less and the 
sea was more quiet. 

We all now went to supper and had quite a discussion 
how and in what manner best to get the launch off, and 
how much, if any, she might be damaged ; and how long 
it might take to get everything in shape again. After 
supper we sat with the tourists on the veranda. We 
noticed that the rustling of the leaves was getting fainter 
and fainter, and felt hopeful that the morning would 
bring us favorable weather to proceed with our wreck- 
ing expedition. 

At about 10 :30 all were in bed. From my window I 
could at times faintly hear the groaning of the launch 
chafing against the pier, and in spite of the most favor- 
able prospects for the morning I had but little sleep. 
At the dawn of the day I was up and found the wind 
and sea down, the launch lying quietly awaiting the 
wreckers, who had promised to be there at 7 o'clock 
sharp. After breakfast I walked impatiently up and 
down the bank, awaiting their arrival. In the mean- 
time our crew had lifted down the cabin deck into the 
water, testing its buoyancy, and found that it would 
easily carry our crew. Finally, at 8 a. m, the fisher- 
men arrived with tackle and ropes. Now all went to 
work turning the launch on an even keel and then bail- 



226 John and Eose 

ing her out, when a hole about 3 by 4 inches was dis- 
covered on the water line, which had been pressed in 
by a stone of that size, lying on the ledge. This was re- 
paired in less than one hour. She was now examined all 
around for leaks. After going over the seams she was 
pronounced O.K. The broken propeller blade was found 
still firmly embedded in the butt of a protruding log 
in the pier. We placed a set of reserve blades on the 
wheel, and now set the tackle for launching, and in less 
than one-quarter of an hour had the launch afloat along- 
side of the pier. Now the cabin deck and all the belong- 
ings had to be replaced, which took us to about 2 o 'clock. 
The wrecker's bill was $20, which we gladly paid. We 
paid our landlord, took our grips aboard, and at 3 
o'clock cast lines to proceed to our next point, Detroit 
Harbor, 16 miles distant, which we expected to reach 
in about two hours, as the weather was ideal, no wind 
or sea to contend against. 

We breathed a breath of relief at having fared so well 
in our first shipwreck. I took an extra cigar, to appre- 
ciate my contentment so much the more. We pointed 
out of North Bay, and before getting out to Lake Michi- 
gan I heard the engine racing, and was informed that 
the shaft coupling had cracked. This again dampened 
our fond prospects. We put our sail up, and in a light 
breeze sailed to our little pier again. Mr. Chas. S. volun- 
teered to drive to Sister Bay to get two rings shrunk 
on the cracked coupling, which would only take about 
one hour, and we expected him back a little after supper. 
The launch was now pulled away from the treacherous 
pier and anchored in the bay. Emil S. and John B. re- 
mained on board. After supper we awaited Chas. S.'s 



John Takes a Lake Cruise 227 

return. We waited till 12 o'clock; but no Chas, S. in 
sight, and I went to bed ; but after one-half hour I heard 
someone whistling and hallooing, which I recognized as 
being Chas. S., and I surmised that he had returned and 
called to the launch at anchor, to let them know that he 
had laid the coupling on the dock, so it could be put on 
early in the morning. Now he came to my room and 
said : ' ' Oh, I had an awful time. ' ' I asked, ' ' Have you 
got the coupling?" This was the most important mat- 
ter to me. "Yes, yes; but wait, wait — an awful time — 
at Sister Bay the only blacksmith there was drunk; 
then I had to try Ellison Bay, four miles further. Now, 
it was past working hours; and so I had to hunt him 
up around town, and at last, induced by an extra fee, 
he consented to open up the shop. I paid him $2.00 
for one hour's work, the highest wages he ever earned 
in his life." "Well, have you got the coupling?" I 
asked again. "Wait," he said, "till I come to it. Well, 
it was a most disagreeable trip ; roads not the best, the 
buggy without springs, and I was reminded of my 
younger days, riding on a lumber wagon. It was dark 
and cold, as we had no robes. But this was not the worst. 
After I had paid the driver $4 for the drive, and when 
he had proceeded some distance on his journey towards 
his home, which was about four miles distant, I was re- 
minded that I forgot the coupling, and he was taking it 
back with him. Now I sweated blood. I ran, hallooed, 
whistled, till I finally drew his attention. After having 
chased him over half a mile the precious doctored cou- 
pling was in my possession, and I laid it on the dock." 
I could not resist laughing aloud in my bed. "But this 
was not all," he exclaimed. "By gosh! I must have 



228 John and Eose 

dropped my pocketbook in the buggy." He fumbled 
around in his pockets and searched the room for a quar- 
ter of an hour. I had another chance to laugh. What 
mattered a pocketbook to me, as long as I knew he had 
the coupling. Finally he exclaimed with a sigh of relief, 
' ' Here is the confounded thing ! ' ' and went to bed 
saying, "What fools we mortals be." I pretended to 
sleep, surmising that he regretted having entered the 
cruise with me, with which I did not feel like disagreeing 
with him, and we were soon asleep. 

Next day was Sunday, and we knew that breakfast 
would not be served till 8 a. m. When I arose the launch 
was at the dock again and the coupling connected, ready 
to start. We took breakfast, went aboard and continued 
our cruise, which was intended to be made to Detroit 
Harbor. The sky was clear, the wind freshening up and 
the sea making from the northeast dead ahead. After 
entering, the lake, we concluded that the wind might 
increase, so that we would have hard work with the 
head sea. While going to Sturgeon Bay Canal we had 
the wind and sea with us, and a chance to reach Green 
Bay City before evening; so it was agreed to abandon 
Detroit Harbor and proceed to Sturgeon Bay. The wind 
was freshening up, and we hoisted the main and foresail 
and made good time, arriving at Sturgeon Bay at 12 :30 
and took dinner at Hotel Waldo. We intended to start 
for Green Bay after dinner, provided my son-in-law. 
Dr. R. W., who intended to take a little trip, was not 
at home in Menominee; but after telephoning we found 
him to be at home, so our course was changed to Me- 
nominee, about 22 miles northwest. We left at 3 p. m., 
and arrived at Menominee at 5 :30. The wind and sea 



John Takes a Lake Cruise 229 

were quite strong from the northeast. We had both sails 
set. Some of the party were seasick for the first time. 
I stayed with my son-in-law, and the rest of the party at 
the Stephenson Hotel. 

The next morning the sky was cloudy, the wind brisk 
from the northeast, with quite a little sea running. We 
all proceeded to our launch to continue our journey to 
Green Bay, which was about 53 miles south. It was now 
10 A. M. When just out of the harbor pier, where the 
inrolling sea is the heaviest, our launch rolled fearfully, 
so that the electric batteries fell over and broke the wire 
connections, which disabled our electric spark, on ac- 
count of which the engine stopped. We were in danger 
of being thrown against the butt of the harbor pier, but 
by quickly setting our sail we managed to get clear and 
sailed slowly to the north, parallel to the shore. After 
this close call it was suggested that we turn back into 
the harbor, but as the engine was going again in less 
than ten minutes we resolved better to proceed, as the 
wind was favorable. For the first six miles we had to 
run in the trough of the sea, about east-southeast, to 
clear Pestigo Reef Buoy. After that we pointed about 
south-southwest, with the wind nearly east-northeast. 
At about 11 o'clock it commenced to rain, continuing for 
about ten minutes. This was the first rain on our cruise, 
of which we had our fill thereafter. We now took our 
lunch and after-dinner smoke, and looked out for Long 
Tailed Lighthouse, the entrance to Green Bay Harbor, 
which finally came to view. The wind was dying down 
and the sun battling with the clouds, gradually gaining 
the mastery, and we entered Green Bay Harbor in a 
clear sky and balmy air, which was encouraging. It was 



230 John and Rose 

now 4:30 p. M., and we concluded that we had better 
run to Depere, where we would arrive before supper. 

The young men in the party agreed to take the trolley 
for Green Bay in the evening to see the sights, as it 
was only about a 20-minute ride. We stopped at the 
California Hotel over night. Aug. K., the proprietor, we 
discovered, was born in Manitowoc. 

Our next point of destination was Appleton. As I 
had taken the trip before, through fourteen locks was 
too tedious for me, although the scenery is like a minia- 
ture Hudson. The next morning I went by rail to Ap- 
pleton to stop with my friend, Judge Fred H., to await 
the arrival of the launch, which was due there at 1 p, m. 
Mr. H. was confined to his home by hay fever, account of 
which he did not take this year's cruise with me, as he 
did last year. The launch arrived at about 1 :30 and 
the crew took dinner at Mr. H. 's. After dinner I went 
aboard again, adding to our crew Mr. H., Jr., who of- 
fered to pilot us to Oshkosh. We left at 3:30, going 
up the river to Menasha and into Lake Winnebago. It 
was now 5 p. m. We pointed south to Oshkosh, which 
was about 15 miles distant. The weather was glorious, 
and the lake smooth. A little island, 10 miles away, 
loomed up in the distance, but it took longer than we 
expected to get abreast of it. Somehow or other it 
seemed that our launch did not make its regular speed, 
which was accounted for by the fact that the launch 
had struck a stone just before reaching Appleton, and 
her brass propeller wheel was bent out of shape. It 
was getting dark when we were about four miles from 
Oshkosh, and as there is no harbor pier, nor lighthouse, 
we could not make out the entrance. We observed a 



John Takes a Lake Cruise 231 

large building lit up brilliantly, and concluded that it 
must be the yacht club building. It was now quite dark. 
We steered past it, then past the point, but could not 
see the entrance, although we were immediately in front 
of the city. Knowing that there were shoals and rocks 
at the entrance, we hesitated, as we were not sure about 
the channel, until we saw a little launch going into what 
we supposed was the harbor. We followed and entered 
all right, making our landing in the former yacht basin, 
an ideal landing. It was now 7 -.30, and we all wended 
our way to the Tremont House, and were fortunate to 
get two rooms for our party. 

Chas. S. and son and John B. intended to stay a few 
days at the yacht races and proceed home from there 
by rail, and one of my sons expected to come here by 
rail with some companion and take the launch home 
with me. 

The next day, Wednesday, was the third yacht race. 
The day was not pleasant — clouds, threatening rain, and 
rather too much wind from the northeast. In the morn- 
ing Oshkosh celebrated its semi-centennial by large pro- 
cessions, music, and speeches. The city was under a 
cloud of bunting and flags, the population on all the 
streets. Their festivity ended at 1 p. m. At 2 p. m. the 
excursion steamers and all kinds of private craft left 
the harbor for the yacht lagoon, where the races were 
to start. 

My daughter arrived in the morning. She had in- 
vited a few ladies to accompany us to the races, so we 
left the harbor with a party of eight all told. When 
we arrived at the starting point the yachts had all 
crossed the line, and some the first stake. The race 



232 John and Rose 

course was a two-mile triangle, twice around, making in 
all 12 miles. There were twelve yachts in the race, 
nearly all of one size, scow-built and sloop -rigged. The 
scene did not appear to me as beautiful as it had on a 
like occasion, three years ago, when I attended a race 
there. Then the sun was out, the air warm, the sea 
smooth, and I was struck by the splendid marine pic- 
ture which presented itself to my view. The little yachts, 
with their white sails, looked like butterflies hovering 
over the water in a serene midsummer air, surrounded 
by over 70 craft of all kinds and sizes. How much more 
enchanting a scene viewed in sunny skies and warm air 
than in dreary weather! We started out and followed 
the racers a few hours, and when the first racers had 
completed their course went to our dock again. In the 
evening we attended the yacht club ball at the clubhouse. 
By 9 p. M. it was so crowded that a person could not sit, 
stand, or dance, so we squeezed out as best we could and 
retired. 

The next day, Thursday, was a dreary day, cloudy, 
sometimes drizzling; a cold and strong wind was blow- 
ing from the northeast. We did not attempt to go out, 
but the race was on, all the same. We viewed the racers 
from the yacht clubhouse. Most all had entered. The 
sea swept the decks of the racers most of the time. The 
crews were lying on the windward rails, and were as 
wet as rats. I wondered how such sport could be en- 
joyed, and why such racing machines had not long ago 
been condemned and in place comfortable yachts substi- 
tuted. Then the sport would not be so disagreeable 
and tortuous. 

Friday the wind was about the same, but it rained 



John Takes a Lake Cruise 233 

more than before, and most of the day was spent in vis- 
iting friends. The yachts raced the same as before, but 
we paid no attention to them. Our party had left for 
home by rail, but we were reinforced by my son, who 
arrived to see the races and go home with us on the 
launch. 

Saturday opened up about the same as the former 
days, but in the afternoon it began to clear up. Dur- 
ing the day we had our launch hauled out to straighten 
the brass propeller wheel and put in a new coupling. 
This was completed about 4 p. m. We then started out 
of the harbor to see how inviting it looked to go to Apple- 
ton that afternoon, but after we had passed the point 
it looked so black and threatening to the northward, the 
course we had to take, and there was such a heavy sea 
running, that we concluded to turn back and try again 
in the morning. Now we had been here four days, of 
which we had expected great things — yacht races, then 
cruising around to Calumet Harbor, Fond Du Lac, Omro, 
Winneconne, Berlin, all in the immediate vicinity of 
Lake Winnebago and Fox and Wolf rivers — but the 
bad weather had brought these expectations to naught; 
and so the terminal point of our cruise was reached. 

Sunday morning, at 6 a. m., we started on our home- 
ward journey, my son, Engineer S. and myself, the only 
parties in the launch. The sun was out, sea still rolling 
from ahead, but the day promised to be fair. After a 
run of two hours we entered Menasha, where we took 
lunch at a bakery. From here I left with the trolley 
for Appleton to visit my friend, F. H., and my son and 
engineer piloted the launch to Appleton, where they 
arrived about 11 and took dinner with us. Here F. H., 



234 John and Eose 

Jr., joined them again, and they started for G-reen Bay at 
about noon. As the weather was perfect, they arrived 
there at 6 p. m. I intended to join them at Green Bay 
next morning, to go from there to Sturgeon Bay, thence 
home. I stayed with Mr. H. over Sunday, intending to 
leave on first train early the next morning, but was told 
that the first train for Green Bay would not leave before 
8:40 A. M. This would bring me to Green Bay about 
10 A. M. After waiting at the depot ten minutes over 
time, I inquired of the agent whether the 8 :40 train 
was late, and was told that it was 50 minutes behind 
time. I asked him why he had not posted the fact on 
the bulletin board, as the law required. He said they 
had none. I pointed to the one on the wall, which he 
said was no slate, and made some other trifling excuse. 
I went uptown again, came back before the 50 minutes 
had expired, and soon enough to see the late train pull- 
ing out of the station. This excited my temper. What 
now ? To lose such beautiful weather, in which we could 
easily sail from Green Bay to Sturgeon Bay and reach 
Kewaunee before sundown, was too exasperating. I was 
told that the next train would leave at 11 a. m., so I tele- 
phoned the clerk of the Beaumont House at Green Bay 
to tell my son I had missed the train and expected to 
arrive there by the next train, 12:30. On arriving on 
this train, which ran close to the river, I failed to notice 
the presence of the launch El Tempo. The weather 
was so beautiful that I said to myself : " If I was in com- 
mand of the launch I should not want to lose such an 
ideal day by waiting for the old man who missed the 
train, and should proceed on my journey and let him 
follow us a little further by rail. And so it turned out: 



John Takes a Lake Cruise 235 

When I arrived at the Beaumont House the clerk told 
me that my son had left about 10 :30, and requested him 
to tell me to take the 3 p. m. train for Sturgeon Bay, 
where they would be on my arrival. I now had a few 
hours left to stroll around. I remembered an old ac- 
quaintance who lived in Manitowoc 50 years ago, but 
moved to Green Bay ten years later, Mr. Joe Kalb, by 
name. I looked him up. Stepping into the hall, I said, 
"Hallo, Mr. Kalb. I am so glad to see you so well. We 
have not seen each other for 38 years. You must be 
nearly 80 years, and I find but little change in your 
looks during that time. But I see I have you. You 
don't recognize me, do you?" "Of course I do; just 
give me a chance to open my mouth. You are John 
S." Well, this sounded familiar. I had to sit down, 
sample the wine of his own production, and of course 
pronounced it excellent, although I was no judge of the 
same. Then he wanted me to pass judgment on his 
other varieties, and in order to stem the flow T had to 
explain that the first glass was more than I usually 
drank in the whole year, and must be excused. After 
recalling olden times and friends I was going to depart, 
but he pressed me to stay a little longer. I told him 
I had missed two trains in the morning, and would not 
like to miss the third in the afternoon. So we walked 
slowly to the depot, and went over many of the old- 
time incidents. The train left on time, 3 p. m., and went 
through mostly cut and burned-over timber land. At 
6 p. M. we arrived at Sturgeon Bay, where my son met 
me at the depot, having arrived with the El Tempo one- 
half hour previous. I told him he had done a sensible 
thing not to have waited for me. They had an ideal 



236 John and Rose 

time coming. We took supper at the Hotel Waldo. 
After that we walked to the launch. Close by lay the 
beautiful steam launch Thistle, owned by E. P. V., a 
lawyer, of Milwaukee. He invited me on board. It 
was a bright moonlight evening. He introduced me to 
his wife, who was enjoying the quiet evening on deck. 
I was shown around, and was told that he had a crew 
of six, and his wife and himself were the only pas- 
sengers. I thought it too bad that the ample, luxurious 
accommodations should be so little utilized, but he said, 
"I don't know. The yacht was used from the first of 
July. She was moored in Milwaukee outer harbor, and 
since then we have always lived aboard of her. My wife 
keeps ship and I come for my meals and lodgings every 
day." He seemed to be in love with the water. Of 
course, at times it was exciting. The other day they 
struck on a bar, in a heavy sea, running into Detroit 
Harbor, but with no damage. All which tended to 
make a cruise more interesting. He had come from 
Green Bay and was bound for Marinette, where he in- 
tended to go the next day, and from there to Sheboygan, 
and then to his home in Milwaukee. 

Early the next morning we left, and when we went out 
of Sturgeon Bay Canal into Lake Michigan the sun with 
all its splendor was just emerging from the lake. The 
lake was smooth as a pond. Two dredges were already 
at work at the entrance. We pointed south with the 
intention of running into Algoma, 15 miles distant, to 
take our breakfast. We expected to arrive there about 
'8 A. M. I lay down on the seat to get some rest, as I 
had but little sleep during the night at the Waldo Ho- 
tel, because in the room above there was a racket until 



John Takes a Lake Cruise 237 

half past twelve, made by some mysterious crowd. Sev- 
eral times I pounded against the ceiling with my cane, 
but with no effect. I was told by the chambermaid next 
morning that it was a minstrel troupe, which she ad- 
monished to silence several times, but no attention was 
paid to her. They were a rough crowd. After a little 
while I fell asleep on the seat. When I awoke we were 
abreast of Algoma, and I asked my son why they had 
not gone in for breakfast. He replied they did not like 
to wake me, and as the weather was so nice they thought 
it too bad to lose time, which, if lost, might prevent our 
reaching home that day, in case the wind and sea should 
increase, as it generally does, in the afternoon. ' ' Yes, ' ' 
I said, ' ' but will you go hungry ? " " Oh, no, ' ' he replied. 
"We had our lunch, and have some left." It consisted 
of crackers and sausages and Lake Michigan water. 
Well, I considered if they could subsist on this, I could, 
and so took my morning meal from the supply on hand 
and my after-breakfast smoke. By this time, about 9 
A. M., we were abreast of Kewaunee. The weather was 
grand, but the wind had freshened from the south, dead 
ahead, and we knew that it would keep on increasing 
and make a sea till late in the afternoon. The spray 
commenced to go over the bow, so we put up our bow 
canvas-splasher. The sea was getting heavier all the 
time. We were now 18 miles from Two River Point 
Lighthouse, and 30 miles from home. The lighthouse 
came to view in an hour, and in another hour we were 
nearly abreast, when we encountered many trap nets, 
which extended into the lake for over a mile. But these 
did not start immediately from the beach, but about one- 
fourth of a mile from the shore. We went inside of 



238 John and Rose 

them, close to the shore. At half past twelve we were 
abreast of Two Elvers, and from here on we had the 
roughest part of our cruise. We changed our course to 
southwest, the sea running in quite strong, nearly dead 
ahead. To avoid the heavy pounding and spray we 
headed a little out of our course, so as to quarter the 
waves, and pointed west-southwest towards Little Mani- 
towoc River, as from there on we could run southeast 
under the lee of the Manitowoc Harbor pier and break- 
water. Under these conditions it took us nearly an 
hour to run from Two Rivers to Manitowoc, a distance 
of six miles, which under more favorable conditions we 
make in 42 minutes. We reached the harbor at 1 :30, 
tied the launch to the dock behind my residence, and 
the little cruise of 1903 here ended. 

In spite of our little wreck and rainy weather, this 
cruise will always remain a pleasant remembrance to 
dwell upon. 

P. S. — A picture of the wreck was contributed by a 
mysterious person, presumably by one of the tourists, 
who overheard our conversation and intended to play 
a joke, or to give me away. While at the scene of our 
wreck I passed the remark that no one must betray me 
by telling anyone at home of our disaster, because my 
reputation was at stake. Many of those who enjoyed 
our little afternoon cruises, because they had the utmost 
faith in my navigation abilities, might, if they heard of 
our wreck, thereafter feel nervous under my captain- 
ship, or might refuse point blank to risk their lives with 
me. 

It was three months after our cruise my wife received 
an envelope with Mrs. conspicuously marked, enclosing 



John Takes a Lake Cruise 239 

only the photo of the wreck, without a scrap of explana- 
tion. If I had not relieved myself of my launch-wreck 
secret long ago, the joke would have carried and placed 
me in an unconfiding situation; but as it happened, it 
missed its purpose, but nevertheless was a welcome ac- 
quisition, for which the sender has my thanks. The 
moral is that : — 

All secrets, if concealed 

In any human heart, 
Will tring far more relief 

If to others we them impart. 
And if we do succeed 

To keep them in our 'breast, 
Some other may reveal — 

So candor is the best. 



CHAPTER XXIX. 

John, as the Only Surviving Charter Member of the Singing Society, 
Delivers His Farewell Address on Its Fiftieth Anniversary 

THE Freier Saengerbund, a singing society, was 
about to celebrate its golden Jubilaeum (50th an- 
niversary). 

A committee waited on John for the purpose of get- 
ting him to agree to deliver an address, and tell about 
the early days of the society at this celebration. On any 
other occasion such an invitation might have flattered 
him in the belief that he was selected because of his 
superior abilities; but in this case it was because they 
had no other choice, as he was the only surviving charter 
member, and had a monopoly on personal experiences of 
the society's history from its birth. 

As he had often related to others the good times he 
had enjoyed in the society, and having quite a store 
of reminiscences on which to draw, he agreed to per- 
form the part requested of him, and when the time came 
he delivered his address as follows : — 

' ' My dear associates : 

''When I stand upon the stage, 
And turn to the first page 
When this Society was horn, 
How I enjoyed its early morn! 
How hright all to me seemed! — 
While now it's like a lovely dream. 
240 



Only Surviving Charter Member 241 

"Since then fifty years have flown, 
And I am left old and alone 
To celebrate with you to-day 
As all my chums have passed away 
Who then were my companions. 

"Yes, ladies and gentlemen, when I look around me 
dnd fail to see a single one of those who were mem- 
bers of the Freier Saengerbund when I joined it, 
and with whom I enjoyed so many of my youthful days, 
it may well affect my emotions with extreme sadness. But 
as we are not here to-night to dwell on the dark side of 
life, but rather on the sunny side, I will speak of the 
happy times in the earlier days of the society. First, 
I shall relate when and how I became a member of it, 
and recall and wander back to the sunny, happy path of 
my youth, and invite you to accompany me in my wan- 
derings. 

"It was in the spring of 1855, fifty years ago, that 
I, at the age of 18 years, became a member of the Freier 
Saengerbund. Manitowoc was then .a small village, in 
its first stage of development. Its inhabitants, mostly 
Germans, were nearly all in their youth or in the prime 
of life. Everyone was inspired with great expectations 
for the future. Then it was that the society was organ- 
ized. 

"My friend Theodore Paulson, who had become a mem- 
ber a week before, persuaded me to join, and introduced 
me to the Saenger Hall, which at that time was a lower 
room in the Dusold Building. At times it had been used 
as a shoemakers' shop, but a month later the singers' 
headquarters occupied the whole of the second floor. 



242 John and Eose 

*'As new members were not voted on till after the 
singing, I sat in a corner, listening and observing all 
that was going on. The singers sat at a long table ; each 
one had a glass of beer in front of him, from which he 
would take a sip after each song. One glass would last 
a member a whole evening; with the exception of one, 
who sipped several glasses. As he was the best singer 
I got the impression that beer was necessary, to lubricate 
the throat so as to stimulate the voice. After the sing- 
ing was over the introduction of members was in order. 

"I was yet a green boy, and that was the first meet- 
ing of any kind that I ever attended. I was nervous 
when my friend proposed me as a new member and they 
proceeded to ballot. However, I was soon pacified, as 
no vote was cast against me. The room seemed quite 
crowded, which probably induced my friend, because he 
had me safely installed to make a motion that the mem- 
bership should not exceed one hundred, of which there 
were about eighty then. But the motion was defeated. 

' ' Then came the crucial test of my voice, to determine 
to what class I should be assigned. This did not in the 
least embarrass me, as in school I could out-sing every- 
body in the class, and my father used to say I had a fog- 
horn voice. So when the director, Schindler, asked me 
to sing the scale, I climbed it courageously, and when I 
got to H-F and was going to repeat, the director ran his 
fingers through his long hair, and said, 'Enough, 
enough ! Second tenor ! ' 

" 'Aha,' I thought. 'He knows what is what.' He 
jumped me at once over fourth and third class and put 
me in the second — I would soon be in the first. 

' ' Since then I have learned that all voices that cannot 



Only Surviving Charter Member 243 

be clearly determined whether they belong here or there, 
are dumped into a second tenor class. This explains 
why that class is always overcrowded. 

"At the next rehearsal the notes were placed before 
me. I had had some lessons on note reading at school, but 
the most from my violin teacher, who at the very first 
acquainted me with the names of the strings — G-, D, 
A, E — and he said the best way to retain them in one's 
memory was to think of the first letters in, '6eh-Du- 
Alter-Esel, ' which means ' Go, you old ass, ' which I shall 
never forget. 

"Now I was in it, and as the German proverb says: 
'Who is among wolves, must howl with them, ' so I did for 
several years, until one after another of my chums hav- 
ing dropped out, leaving for other fields, I began to feel 
that the society could get along better without than with 
me. So I, too, retired as an active, but remained as 
passive, member for twenty-two years. Being a passive 
member means, 'Keep your mouth closed, but pay your 
dues,' which I always continued to do. For my devo- 
tion and constancy, which the members admired, I was 
rewarded by being elected an honorary member. This 
means, 'Entirely useless, even as a contributor.' 

' ' In the earlier days the society was the leader in most 
of our sociables. In the summer seasons it would arrange 
country tours and picnics ; in the winter, sleigh parties, 
concerts and dances ; and I must say when I review my 
whole life the brief time of my active membership was 
the happiest. How often now do I hum the dear old 
songs we used to sing, and how joyfuUy do these revive 
the happy days of my youth. 

"I have often wondered why the native born entirely 



244 John and Rose 

neglect and ignore the elevating effects and joy fulness of 
song. They are so much more edifying and refining 
than the games now prevalent as the only recourse of 
amusement. I might, as a sample, sing a few of the 
songs we used to sing in the early days, and give you the 
charm of my voice, but I fear it might so affect my emo- 
tion to sadness that I would break down, or you might 
say as my director said, 'It is enough, be done,' which 
I will follow and leave this for your imagination. That 
which has been most vividly retained in my memory and 
the most prominent episode when an active member of 
the society, I will now relate : 



THE SERENADES 

"It was a beautiful mid-summer evening. A warm 
wind stirred lightly from the west, and the moon shone 
brightly. It was an evening when one would seek com- 
fort outside rather than inside the house, which is seldom 
the case in our climate. The singers had just adjourned. 
AU had retired to their homes except four young men 
about the same age, who were called the 'Four-Leaf 
Clover,' because they were always found grouped to- 
gether. They remained, and were seated on a bench be- 
fore the singer's hall. Three of them were under the 
guardianship of their parents, while one was an orphan, 
and therefore to be excused for his uncontrollable tem- 
per. The orphan looked at the moon, began to sing and 
kept up the refrain, 'Moon what a face you dispose, one 
eye open, the other closed.' He kept on repeating the 
refrain, and it required all our entreaties to make him 
desist. After we had quieted him, we talked about the 



Only Surviving Charter Member 245 

picnic the society had planned to hold at the Rapids the 
following Sunday, and whether we would invite our 
girls, as a concert and dancing would be the main fea- 
tures. 

"The picnic was to be held on Indian Hill at the 
Rapids, on the top of which was a level spot or opening, 
suitable for games and dancing, and was often fre- 
quented for such purposes. As no one wanted to reveal 
just then the name of the girl he would invite, and as 
there might be a clash if it should happen that all 
wanted to invite the same girl, this matter was left in 
abeyance. The orphan, who had come from Germany, a 
few years before, told about the journey across the ocean, 
what glorious times they had, while singing on moon- 
light evenings, on deck until midnight; then he ex- 
claimed, 'Boys, what a glorious evening to serenade our 
sweethearts.' 'Sweethearts!' all exclaimed. 'Yes, sweet- 
hearts. ' 

" 'But,' said another, 'if we have none?' 

' ' ' Have none ! then you ought to be ashamed of your- 
selves. I have four.' 

"His companions laughed, but nevertheless his sug- 
gestion appealed to them as opportune. 

"Yes, they would serenade. They instinctively went 
upstairs, to the singer hall. Each took a singing desk, 
and one was in the act of carrying the notebooks along, 
when he was reminded that they could sing better from 
a board than from a book, so the books were left be- 
hind. Now all went down-stairs into the open again. As 
on such occasions there must be a leader, one of them 
generously offered to take this important part in their 
exploit. 



246 John and Rose 

''Now the question arose, who to serenade first. The 

leader commanded straight to Miss No. 1. In those 

days the roads were yet in their natural state, especially 
the one they traveled, which was deep lake sand, on 
which we had hard work to drag ourselves, with our desks 
on our shoulders. Arriving at Miss No. I's home, after 
recovering our breath, some one asked the location of 
her bedroom. The leader pointed to it. 

' ' ' Ah, ah, ' said one, ' how do you know ? Never mind 
answering, we believe you. ' 

' ' The four desks were planted in the sand in front of 
her window, and then they noticed how ridiculous it was 
to have carried them along. One of the singers, however, 
said they were all right, as they had something to lean 
against if the singing should weaken their knees. It 
would look more dignified, they would draw more atten- 
tion, and even if the singing did not come up to expecta- 
tions, all would see by their extraordinary efforts, carry- 
ing the desks as a cross on their shoulders, their good 
intentions; the friendship we had for them, which they 
would appreciate and enjoy more than the best songs of 
opera singers. This phase palliated for the burden of 
the desk carrying thereafter. It was discovered that two 
sang second tenor, two first bass; therefore they were 
short one first tenor, and one second bass to complete 
the quartet. 

"The orphan had a suggestion, which would easily 
overcome their difficulty. He thought that if one of the 
second tenors climbed up one step, and one of the first 
basses down a step on the scale, the quartette would be 
complete. Some expressed their doubt, but they had no 
better plan to offer. The next question arose what song 



Only Surviving Charter Member 247 

to sing. The leader reminded them that Miss No. 1 was 
a musical critic, therefore they had to select something 
classical, and render it in voices that would be critic- 
proof, or else they would be the subjects of ridicule. All 
of them were throwing out suggestions as to what to 
sing. One of the company suggested the song: 'Under 
all the trees is rest, all the birds are in their nests, ' ' 0, 
no,' the majority exclaimed, 'it would be too much like 
a funeral song. They would sing that at her grave in 
case they outlived her. ' Another one proposed, ' Slum- 
ber gently, my dearest.' 'Pshaw,' said one, 'we don't 
want her to snore : we want her wide awake. What are 
we here for?' 

" 'I have it,' said another, 'let us sing, "Awake, my 
dear, awake, come down and shake. ' ' ' This song was not 
agreed to because it was too much like ragtime music. 
They would not sing such trash as that. Finally they 
settled on singing, 'The Evening Bells.' The leader 
called attention, brought dovni his stick, and their first 
song was launched into the air. After the first verse was 
sung, no one attempted the second verse, as they all felt 
that they had failed, and they would have been glad if 
the moon was the only witness to it. Each took his desk 
on his shoulder and quietly withdrew, without speaking 
a word, and marched back to the singer 's hall. 

"After we had somewhat recovered from our fiasco 
the orphan said, 'Now then, to Miss No. 2.' He was 
asked if he had not had enough. 

" 'Why, no, do you suppose that a little set-back like 
that would make me give up? Where would we be, if 
on such occasions we should become so easily discouraged 
as to never try again. You have been taught in school. 



248 John and Rose 

that if at first you don't succeed, try, try again. I can- 
not understand your timidity. You do not suppose that 
my sweetheart should lose the pleasure of a serenade. 
Not by any means; I will go alone rather than that she 
should be deprived of it. I have an idea : let us change 
the quartette to a grand chorus. By the volume our 
false voices will be covered up, drowned, so as not to be 
detected, and we will sing the old folk songs, ' ' My Dear 
Moon, You Glide So Gently." ' All looked up to the 
moon, and as it smiled so encouragingly we agreed to 
make a second attempt. 

"The desks were again shouldered, and we proceeded 
to the home of Miss No. 2. After the desks had been ar- 
ranged, our leader gave the sign and we sailed with the 
moon through the clouds. We were so pleased with our 
singing that we sang the second and third verses, but 
were disappointed that we did not observe anyone at the 
windows, nor anywhere else. It was too bad, if the song 
had fallen on deaf ears. But in one thing we all agreed, 
and this was that our voices were not at fault, but the 
song, the melody, if we failed. 

"No one asked where to go next. With the fullest 
confidence we wended our way to Miss No. 3. When 
under way we expressed our regrets that the second 
serenade had been so barren of results, in spite of the 
beautiful singing. Our problem was to attract atten- 
tion. One said, ' If I only had my revolver I would shoot 
off a broadside, which would call attention of the dead. ' 
Another said, ' How would it be to build a bonfire 1 No, 
no, that would not do; it would bring out the fire bri- 
gade, our voices and ourselves would be drowned by 
water, and the police might lodge us in jail.' 



Only Surviving Charter Member 249 

"Dejectedly casting his eyes on the ground and de- 
tecting a pebble, our leader said, 'Boys, I have it. "We 
will sing again "Dear Moon," and when we enter the 
clouds with it, some one throw this pebble near her win- 
dow, which will force attention. ' 

" 'Why, yes, a splendid idea,' said one, and another 
volunteered to perform this part, and to prove how well 
he was fitted for this task, he related the following: 
'Wlien I was a small boy my sister and I played William 
Tell. I placed a large potato on her head, and at ten 
paces, with a pebble, hit only an inch below it, so that 
the potato and all under it fell into a heap. ' 

"Of course his ability was at once recognized. The 
leader called attention, and ordered that as soon as they 
enter the clouds, the pebble should be thrown, and so it 
was. But, oh, mercy! It had gone a little out of its 
intended spot, and through the window. Although this 
disconcerted the singers somewhat, still they kept on, as 
they knew it must arouse attention, which was their main 
object. While singing one more timid than the rest 
stopped, and called the attention of our leader to a 
shadow, surmising it was the father with a shot-gun. 

' ' The leader looked, fell into a panic, and with a com- 
manding voice said, ' Boys, stand from under ! Retreat, 
double quick. ' He ran ahead and in the excitement left 
his desk behind. The others had saved theirs. When 
we thought ourselves beyond the range of the gun, we 
were near the grounds where this hall stands now. 
Through these grounds ran a small creek, and on its 
banks we rested. As we sat there everyone tried to put 
the blame on the others, and we discussed the probable 
damaging effects of our exploits. As no one hoped for 



250 John and Rose 

approval, we were much perturbed, and while convers- 
ing the shrill whistle of Guyles' Mill was heard as it blew 
every night at 12 o'clock. 

" 'Oh, my!' one exclaimed, 'already twelve o'clock. 
How often did my mother tell me to return home as soon 
as the singing was ended! How often did I promise, 
and how often did I break it ! How often did she tell me 
I was the black sheep of the family, and that I would 
worry her to death. Yes, she was right. It is a shame. 
I would not care for punishment if that would give her 
relief, but I can't bear to see her grieve.' 

"Our orphan had again struck a saving idea. In a 
triumphant manner he arose from the sod and said: 
' Boys, it is really a shame how you treat and ignore your 
mothers. I can appreciate this better than you can, be- 
cause I lost mine in my childhood. To think that you 
lavish your love and attention on girls, who only trifle 
with you, while your mothers have sacrificed their lives 
for you, and have more love for you in their little fingers 
than is contained in all the bodies and souls of your 
girls. Is it not shameful that you never serenaded your 
mothers in preference to the girls? 

" 'Now I propose we serenade your dear mothers. I 
know they deserve it and will enjoy it more than the 
girls, and you may feel assured you will forego your de- 
served punishment.' 

' ' All agreed that this might wind up their unfortunate 
serenades into a glorious ending. The desks were again 
shouldered and our way wended to mother No, 1. This 
boy in the meantime had selected a song which he 
thought would please his mother, and this was, ' The Day 



Only Surviving Charter Member 251 

of Our Lord.' This was sung V7ith solemnity and we 
knew it would be appreciated if heard. 

* ' The second son had in mind a song, which his mother 
often sang when she was in a happy mood, which gave 
him the impression that she sang it often when she was 
courted by father. It was, ' Oh, When I Pass Her Door. ' 
This, too, was well rendered. 

"After that we came to the last mother, whose son had 
selected a song, which he knew would soften her anger 
over his disobedience. He said, 'When the soldiers 
marched through our village and sang the pathetic war 
song, "Morning, Eed," the tears poured from her eyes 
like a shower bath. ' On our arrival at her home, her lamp 
was still burning in her room, as she would not retire 
before all her chicks were under her wings. The song 
was started pianissimo, gradually grew louder and to a 
strong crescendo when coming to ' Shot in his breast, and 
now at rest. ' 

"We looked up to the window and observed that the 
light had disappeared, a sign that she had listened to our 
song; which so overwhelmed her emotion that she had 
to retire. All knew that her lost son's punishment, if 
there had been any in store for him, would be sus- 
pended. 

' ' Now our program was completed. We delivered our 
three remaining desks to the Saenger Hall — sang as a 
close, the song, ' Good Night, ' all went to our homes and 
the serenade of the night ended, and became a memory. 

"Since that time nearly 50 years have passed, and as 
is to be expected, most of those who were with us then 
are no more. The girls, all but one, are alive, and with 



252 John and Rose 

considerable accretions. The parents have all passed 
away. But what has become of our 'Four-Leaf Clover/ 
our serenaders? The first we lost was Oscar Linde- 
mann, who but a few years later met his death in the 
Mississippi River. The second, Gus Esslinger, served 
all through the War of the Rebellion, which so taxed his 
frail constitution that he died at the early age of 34 
years. The next was Theodore Paulson; but before I 
lower him in the grave I must relate the visit I paid 
him while passing through Omaha in 1876. It was on 
June 4th at 4 o'clock in the morning when I arrived at 
the hotel in Omaha. I at once inquired for my friend 
Paulson, and was informed that he was well-to-do, had 
a dairy farm close to the corporation line. He brought 
milk to the city every morning, and if I waited a little I 
could meet him as soon as he brought milk to the hotel. 
I had not long to wait, when he came driving along, and 
was pointed out to me. I went out on the sidewalk to 
meet him, and saw his name on the wagon, which as- 
sured me of his identity. I approached him with a 
hearty, 'Good morning, Theodore, how goes it? Up so 
early?' He looked astonished. 'Don't recognize me, do 
you ? ' he strained his brain to remember. I assisted 
him with, 'Wisconsin, Manitowoc' That did not en- 
lighten him. ' Serenade night ! ' 

" 'Well, well, my dear John. You surprise me. How 
are you? It is just as if you dropped down from 
heaven. ' 

" 'Oh, no. If I had been there we never would have 
met again.' 

" 'Why not? Don't you think I will get there if 
you do?' 



Only Surviving Charter Member 253 

"I don't know — but never mind. I wonder that you 
did not recognize me at once. We only parted eighteen 
years ago, and I have yet my full hair, neither white nor 
bald, and I can't have changed much. I knew you on 
the instant.' 

" 'Yes, because you saw my name in six-inch letters 
on my wagon box — you could not fail. ' 

" 'Yes,' I admitted, 'it assisted me.' Then we went 
into the hotel to refresh and calm our excited nerves by a 
stimulant, and a cigar. 

' ' ' Say, John, wait here a little while. I have to serve 
a few more of my customers with milk. I will return 
soon, after which we will drive to my house to take 
breakfast. ' 

' ' ' Oh, no. I will drive with you in your milk wagon, 
which will be more pleasure to me than a carriage, pro- 
vided your milk is not watered.' 

" 'What do I hear? After you have known me so 
long, you are still joking.' 

' ' I jumped into his wagon and told him to give me a 
sign to ring the bell when arriving at customers' houses, 
and so I peddled milk in Omaha. 

"After we were through, we rode to his home on the 
farm. He told me to look over the stock in the stable, 
and in the interim he would tell his wife of their new 
guest, and have her prepare breakfast. He soon re- 
turned, introduced me to his wife and then to his chil- 
dren, of whom there were a great number. 

" 'Well, well, you are certainly blest,' said I. 'How 
many children have you?' 

" 'Let me see — ' Then he turned to his wife, and in- 
quired of her the number of children. She twitted him 



254 John and Eose 

on his ignorance, and then replied, 'Eleven. Don't you 
know?' 

"After this we took our breakfast, and at this feast 
Mrs. Paulson heard more about her husband's early 
pranks than she ever knew before. As soon as breakfast 
was over and during the day we rode in his carriage 
through the city. I was shown his buildings, introduced 
to his friends, and entertained in the usual way. In 
this manner the day drew toward evening when my train 
was due, and we parted with the sincere opinion that 
this meeting was and will be among the happiest to be 
stored in our memories. 

"And Paulson, too, passed away about twelve years 
later. When I was at the Omaha Exposition I called on 
his wife, who told me that her husband really worried 
himself to death. That he had become a politician, was 
a state senator, a friend of the state treasurer, for whom 
he had given security as bondsman, on which he was sued 
to make up the shortage of the treasurer, and which ab- 
sorbed most of his property. 

"So of the once blooming 'Four-Leaf Clover,' three 
leaves are beneath the sod, and the last, now in a wither- 
ing state, stands before you, soon to be called to join his 
companions, and when the end has arrived, then you 
may sing the impressive German funeral song : — 

''JJnter alien Gipfeln ist Ruh, 
In alien Wipfeln spurest du 
Kaum einen Hauch, 
Die Voglein schlummern in Walde. 
Warte nur, warte nur, halde, 
Balde schldfsf auch du!" 



JOHN SCHUETTE, PrCS. 

Louis Schuette, Vice-Pres. 



Edwin Schuette, Cash. 
Henry Detjen. Asst. Cash. 



iiattitnmnr i^aumga lank 



Pay 

3 Per Cent 

Interest 

on 

Savings 

and 

Certificates 

of 

Deposits 




Sell 
Drafts on all 

Places 
Much Cheaper 

than 

Money or 
Express 

Orders 

Make Loans 



Capital 
Surplus 



$200,000.00 
35,000.00 



1^ UlliC^^^-i^llll Municipal 



First 
Mort^a^es 

Acts as 

GUARDIAN 

TRUSTEE 

EXECUTOR 



^t##C@. 



CAPITAL STOCK 

$50,000 

Deposited with State Treasurer 



Agent for 
INSURANCE 
REAL ESTATE 
SURETY BONDS 



CUSTODIAN OF FUNDS FOR INVESTMENT 
TRIPLE-KEY SAFE DEPOSIT VAULTS 



Emil Baensch, President 
John Schuette 



BOARD OF DIRECTORS: 



Louis Schuette 



Oscar A. Alter, Secretary 
Edwin Schuette 



LIBRARY OF CONGKtbb 




014 184 815 A # 



